Aibu to not want to move up north

[time2changeCharlieBrown]

My dh has been offered a great job opportunity a high payrise
the catch is we have to relocate up north near Leeds
so my main concerns is the weather
I hate winter, rain and snow and up there seems to get more?
also I joined a few online community groups recently to get a feel for it and learn about the areas and what’s around
all I have mainly seen is awful things about robbery’s and car theft and violent crimes! It’s really putting me off!
we have a son who is not too far off an age to go clubbing and for nights out and even though he is 6 foot 5 he’s very striking looking mixed race (Greek) and I worry about him being a target and our eldest daughter too also very striking ,but both quite naive as we currently live in a small village and don’t often go into big cities and they are at small schools.
my dh is from a different town up north not too far from Leeds still has friends there and says it’s fine and all city’s are the same and the kids will be fine as not in any gangs and unlikely to be. I am a worrier so Aibu to not want to move?

Op you’ve just zeroed in on the one negative comment (that was clearly someone taking the mick!) out of the hundreds of positive ones!

This reminds me of FIL, who comes north to visit us with multiple extra layers of clothing packed for THE NORTH, and always starts off by saying how incredibly warm it was in London when they left. Once the sun sets he also comments on how you can’t see the stars in THE NORTH. He also looks completely awkward and uptight when someone says ‘good morning’ on a walk in the countryside. Apparently that only happens in THE NORTH and is intrusive.

it would be far nicer for everyone involved if southerners with the above attitudes wouldn’t come. I’m southern by background but you won’t ever drag me out of Yorkshire. It has everything and more.

Don’t worry, there are loads of small villages full of snobby people all around Leeds. Sounds like you’ll fit right in.
Just bring a big coat.

I've lived in Sheffield and Glasgow, and still have family in Glasgow, and would say without hesitation the weather on Glasgow is considerably worse. There's little difference between Leeds and Sheffield.

@Needanadultgapyear I was very lucky to go to college in Ilkley in the 90s and have managed to stay. Just back from 3 weeks away and I still love waking up to the views from my windows. I'm from the Midlands originally and my parents love visiting as it's so flat there!

Looking back on your post, if he’s travelling around a lot in Yorkshire too then consider villages in close proximity to the M1/A1 as that would make his commute easier.

I'm in the North West (few miles south of Manchester) and it is true it can be wetter up here.

However I seem to recall being told that Leeds is in a bit of a rain shadow from the Pennines so it rains less there than many places in the country.

Yorkshire is certainly a lovely part of the world.

Have a look at the Ilkley area. It’s lovely and has won the Times best place to live in the UK in 2022. Direct trains to Leeds in about 20 minutes, lovely old spa town. Brilliant schools, right at the start of the Yorkshire Dales. I’m from another country originally and will never live anywhere else.

I'm from the north West originally, came home for two weeks in June this summer and was shocked at how crap the weather was. 12 degrees and raining, almost every day

I'm from the south coast. Our June wasn't much better.

Neither was July.

There's been some questionable days in august too.

Of course it's showing pure sun from next Monday when the schools go back 😂

Lol. I've just come back from a week in London. People were really friendly, I'm utterly useless in a big city so had to ask for help with the underground etc and people were lovely. Maybe it was my infectious northern demeanor 🤣 I was glad I left me big coat at home though😁

And wtf about the stars?! Most dark skies will be further north surely?!

I’m in the south west too. Garforth is not my cup of tea. Look at York or Harrogate.

I know 🤦🏼‍♀️
Hilarious.

Just to clarify on your son being mixed race. They’re half Greek and half English? Do Greek people consider themselves a different race? Because a half Greek, half English kid probably isn’t going to be considered as anything other than white by a random passer by. Unless I’ve misunderstood and you are a POC yourself?

No wonder some people in the North think southeners are all effete snobs. Seriously, have you never travelled beyond Watford? The weather is marginally colder, it's not the Arctic. Leeds is a vibrant modern city and Yorkshire is lovely with many nice villages or smaller towns. Crime is present in any big city.

Go there for a week or long weekend to get the feel but leave your prejudices at home. Maybe you're having a wind up on MN.

Just don’t mention that Ilkley is technically part of Bradford to the OP

I’m hoping to move back to West Yorkshire soon. It’s definitely drier than the western side of the Pennines.

I wouldn’t want to be in any of the places your DH has mentioned though. For a village/small town feel look at Ilkley, Addingham, Otley, Pool, Burley in Wharfedale, maybe Bramhope. I’d recommend booking a weekend in one of those places and visiting the others. All very commutable into the centre.

Leeds itself is very multicultural, so there will be no worries on that front.

Some things I love about the north (west) having moved here from the south east over 10 years ago:

• brilliant cities
• gorgeous villages
• lovely period properties
• diverse communities
• beautiful countryside close by
• the Lake District, Peak District, Snowdonia & Scotland all within easy travel distance
• choice of airports for holidays away
• loads of museums & attractions for kids & families
• fast trains into London
• friendly people

All of this depends of course on where abouts you live & work, because 'the north' is massive, not one homogeneous blob of stereotypes mostly conceived by southerners who've never spent any time here.

Please don't go with a set of misconceptions, or expect to get to fully know the area in one short trip, there are some great recommendations on this thread to help you. Hope your first visit is a good one.

Ar least it's the right side of the Pennines...only half joking - we foolishly moved to the north west of England after 20 odd years in the south west and we're still paying for it including financially and health wise. I grew up in the north east and wish we'd waited for a job there or in Yorkshire.

Yorkshire is a bit colder than the south but it's nowhere near as wet as Manchester and there are lots of opportunities in Leeds still plus plenty of nice small villages round about. I also prefer York to Leeds but that's partly because of my age. Both have excellent transport links, Leeds is a real hub these day. As others have said, take a couple of trips, you'll probably be very pleasantly surprised.

@SilverBranchGoldenPears 🤣🤣

If you go onto the met office website you can look at all the stats for the weather averages, rainfall, hours of sun, temperature etc. I used this when I relocated back to the Uk. I’m afraid where you’re looking is around 3 degrees cooler than the south, which may not sounds much, but this is a 30 year long term average.

Leeds is a big city surrounded by gorgeous countryside, including lots of lovely little villages.

This. The countryside around Leeds is terrific, and it's tucked in between 2 national parks. There are nice small towns nearby, too, like Otley and Wetherby, that may be commutable to Leeds, especially if your DH can WFH some days.

Leeds undoubtedly has its nicer areas. A former colleague moved to Roundhay and really loves it, especially as the house they bought is twice the size of the one they sold and their mortgage is smaller. She also says it's more peaceful than the small south coast town they lived in previously.

I think there's a lot of snootiness about northern England, and I'm not being partisan, I've never lived north of the Thames.

Anyway, it can't be all bad - it has a Harvey Nichols!

Definitely. Leeds is Down South for me also.

In terms of rain the area around Leeds is nothing like Manchester. Look at the weather map - most of the rain hits the uk from the west and falls west of the Pennines.
Also, if you live in and like small village life then why on earth would you move to Leeds city centre? There are thousands of villages in West Yorkshire. Many if not most people in that part of the country commute in from towns and villages.