Kirstie Allsop's 15 Year Old Son

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Kirstie Allsop has just posted on X (Twitter) that her 15 year old son has just returned from inter-railing around Europe.

He was accompanied by his 16 year old friend.

AIBU to think this is too young?

These situations may seem OK but at that age they think they are invincible, so they can be impulsive and not make the best decisions, especially when something goes wrong!

This. The least of his problems would have been having to worry about being short of a bob, or two, no doubt.

Generations past would have done things like this without blinking. If the DC are sensible and risk-averse, they are likely just as capable keeping safe as older young people who have not previously done things on their own. For all you know, he could be in the CCF at school, and very able at adventuring and looking after himself in challenging circumstances.

DD is 18 but went on a totally self-planned and self-organised holiday abroad, with two of her besties, this summer. She is not well (internationally) travelled, but she's very sensible and a natural-born leader, so I didn't worry. They had a ball.

I think that's quite young. It's more of a 17/18 old after finishing A levels kind of activity I think!

Yess youth hostels are great but a sixteen year old (at least in the UK) cant stay in one without an eighteen year old companion.

That's very different from allowing!

YABU

Different parents have set up their teens for different experiences and unfortunately imo many have infantised their teens. The outcome is immature teens that are not maturing until they are 19/20 years old. Whereas back in the 1970s a 16 year old would get a flat share when they left home, now they are seen as children that aren't allowed to be left at home when parents go on holiday.

Give your younger children responsibility and they will learn as they grow to take on more tasks and become independent. Its not about robbing them of their childhood but allowing them to flourish as a person

My eldest has just got back from interrailling, a couple of his friends were under 18 and they had to have non shared room in the hostels and be accompanied by an over 18.

You “allowed” your adult daughters to go abroad? 🤨🤨

That's clever of him because you can't stay in a European hostel if you are under 18 unless accompanied by someone who is.

The "poor lad"? "Holiday being discussed on SM"? She's literally just said he went inter-railing round Europe?

There are a lot (too many!) of "celebs" who use their kids for social media and monetising purposes from the minute they're born (the Beckhams and Kardashians being the two main culprits!) and don't think twice about broadcasting every single second of their lives. This was just a pretty normal parent post. And I don't think anyone would even know her son if they passed him on the street!

I thought this was normal. Mine did it at 16, and she’s a girl, if it makes any difference,

op parent your own, not other people’s kids

I'm on a Facebook group for university students (the uni my daughter attend) I joined at the recommendation of a friend, it's full of parents micromanaging their kids right up to the end of the third year. Asking what to do about their 20 odd year old being late handing in a paper, reporting being absent and suchlike.

Some parents really need to back off and let their kids learn some independence, I'm sure this boy's parents know his capabilities and have been keeping in touch.

I will admit that I was having kittens the whole time, and nearly didn’t allow it, but at 13 dd2 and a school friend also 13, did a day trip on their own, SW London to Calais. Train to central London and to Dover, foot passengers on the ferry - day in Calais, and same again back. Their idea - they wanted an ‘adventure’.

This was well before mobile phones, and Calais was a lot safer than it is now. But my name, and the name of the other school mum, were mud with most of the other school mums!

That should read parents of university students.

And as young attractive teenage girls on their first holiday without parents, I wanted to be sure they were travelling somewhere suitable, and not where they would be subject to lots of hassle from men.

So how exactly did you find them somewhere suitable where no men would approach them?!?! I'm intrigued!

You do know that men in other countries have seen teenage girls before? And attractive ones too? And you know most 18 year old girls love attention off handsome, tanned Greek men don't you?!

Some parents behave like spirit possessions, literally getting inside the body of their children to take over their lives.

Some teens definitely need to get an exorcist

Especially if at 18 they are still being controlled by their parents, they need to be able to make their own choices without bias

This is so sad. But, as an employer, we've had people in their 20s start working for us and then their parents will ring in sick for them. Or they will ring with questions about their contract or working hours. We have to say we can only discuss their personnel details with the employee themselves and they hate it. It's very strange!

I'm sure she is checking in with him. My son is a similar age and he is quite a confident traveller, good at making plans, working out what to do etc. Friends the same age don't seem to have a clue what they are doing. It depends on the child.

Yes, from what the person who knows her tells me, it sounds like that (but the person I know who knows her says she was never patronising to her).

And good for her. At 18 I was dropped off at the coach station with my cases by my mum. I got down to London, got on the boat train, found the right train at Calais, and went to the Alps for a year to work. I probably made my own ham sandwich though …

My parents thought nothing of it. We were expected to be able to live and work abroad -we were staying with employers so not having to find accommodation. Three years later DB went even further afield on his own at 18.

I think it's great that they allowed him to do it. Character building.

Pithy and on point to some. Opinions innit?

She will indeed say this. She likes to say a lot, but I bet you what she does in practice is very very different.

That's clever of him because you can't stay in a European hostel if you are under 18 unless accompanied by someone who is
There are international hostels that allow over 16s to stay there. They usually need a letter of consent from parents and they are not allowed in the bar area. From what I recall they have to have a so room.
I agree that many are for over 18s but in Krakow, Prague, Bucharest, Paris and Budapest you can find hostels that allow 16 to 18 year old with out needing an over 18 year old with them.

Oh yes - I’m sure all univ heads of department and many staff in general know this. One mother wanted to discuss why her son had failed his dissertation, telling me he didn’t know. I knew very well he knew as I’d told him.

She admitted he had a job, was getting a mortgage and getting married. But she was ringing up his uni HoD to try to discuss his work.

I’ve been harangued by parents demanding to know their DCs’ attendance record or grades. I’ve been reminded that they are making a significant financial contribution. Many parents don’t see uni as different to school, clearly. I’ve had to remind them that it is their right to withdraw financial support if they have concerns - but their child is legally an adult. That seems to be a strange concept to some parents.

@Starlight1979 I doubt my parents knew what course I was studying at University never mind when papers were due in or when exams were happening.

I've advised a couple of parents to get their young adult child to email their tutor or go into their department admin department or make a phone call themselves but it falls on deaf ears.