Stop saying my baby is small!

[leedsmum21]

AIBU to ask everyone to stop commenting when a baby is small?
My baby was born small, has stayed on their centile line and now, nearing age 1, is still very little. I am finding it quite hurtful how many people comment on how little he is. It's particularly annoying when they express huge shock at his age! I appreciate it is probably my own insecurity as I have been worried about his growth, but it just seems unnecessary to point something like that out. Maybe mums of big babies have the opposite problem, but in my experience big babies are always considered to be 'thriving'.

Mines 2 I'm over it, she's small but mighty and more advanced than others. Take the win and enjoy less clothing shopping lol

I have one that was big and people always mentioned it. His little brother is average sized and everyone mentions how much hair he has... people just like to comment on babies. Try not to let it bother you.

I think often people just like to engage with parents about babies and children so pick something they can mention to start up a conversation.

I always had this with my DD, she was tiny. Often had people commenting on how she was too young to be having solids and the lady in Clarks told me she was too small for shoes until I took her out of her pram and she stood up.

I know exactly what you mean. My DD was premature and I had to take her into hospital for a check up when she was not even 5 pounds in weight. Some woman leaned over and breathed right in her face, 'she's like a little DOLLY!' I was so mad. People need to stop and think!

I have a big 5 year old born on the 99th centile and stated that way. He’s always been too big for age appropriate toys like ballance bikes and things. And people expect a lot more out of him as he looks like a 8 year old but he’s 5

But yes, I agree with the others, people usually find something to comment on, so much hair, huge eyes, chubby cheeks etc.

But babies are small. All of them. It's one of the few attributes a baby even has and when one is put in a situation where it might be polite to acknowledge a baby 'oh aren't they little?' is just standard smalltalk like 'oh isn't the weather nice/chilly/wet today'. What's the alternative 'oh look at how bald they are' just doesn't work as well given that small is associated with cuteness etc whereas bald is generally not considered a favourable attribute.

Same!
Was born tall and always been tall. We got kicked out of a soft play when he was 2 as they thought he was a lot older!

Weirdly I have one on the 96th centile and one on the 0.2nd for height, both get constant comments! It’s very annoying and sometimes pulls on my insecurities/worries but people just like to make trivial conversation.

Im afraid it happens, they are babies for a tiny time and when you don't see babies any more (I'm 49 and no one I know has a baby) when you see them it's like a magnet. I get drawn over and then want to see them more so say some bollocks.
I apologise for this as I'm sure I say something irritating.

You get issues the other way- a 99th percentile height baby girl- everyone thinks she 2 years older than she is. Throw in delayed speech and the tantrum years created some judgemental looks.
fact is people throw out comments without a second thought so don’t take to heart.

My first child was on the 91st percentile, my second child is on the 9th (gone down to second which is a worry). I've had comments on both but it's who they are, as long as they follow their percentile path there is no worry. My second I am concerned because of the drop, but I am too old to care what people think or say about it.

I say all babies are small because my youngest is 13 now so all babies seem teeny tiny to me! It's just chit chat

‘Great things come in small packages’ and leave it at that. No need for an offended sulk. You know your kid is healthy.

Totally agree op, only comment especially from strangers that one should make is that the baby is beautiful, lovely etc...

No idea why but it seems people always have to comment on something about a baby/toddler. Oh she's tall for her age, oh what a head of hair, oh he's dainty blah blah. Try not to let it get to you. My dd was a small baby and has remained small but it hasn't held her back at all

Have the opposite with my 3 year old, he's a big boy and has been since birth. He's a head shorter than his 8 year old brother.

Oh no someone commented that your small baby is small, it's really not a big deal

People can't judge these things anyway. I got told mine was "enormous". 9th percentile! Girl got called a boy etc. Just ignore. They are only trying to make conversation.

Someone called my daughter big the other day and I laughed at them. She's an absolute dot and I love how dinky she is. My son on the other hand is an absolute giant for his age! They all grow their own way - try not to take it to heart ❤️ most people equate small with cute so it may be a clumsy attempt at a compliment

My dd is tiny. She’s 8 but in 6-7 clothes and some 5-6. I love it. She loves it. She’s the smallest in her class. Little dot. It doesn’t really matter their size. It’ll all even out in the end

I have the opposite problem! Even the doctor on the day my LO was born said "wow, that's a big baby!" People are always saying how big he is and I find it really annoying. Especially as they treat him as though he's much older than he is. I don't think people mean anything by it but I feel your pain, even if it's for the opposite reason!

I totallyyyyyyy understand this OP. Both my DC were small babies and people frequently remark how small they were/are. My first was on the 6th percentile and 5.13lb at birth and gradually reached the 50th when he turned 1. The most annoying thing people would do is comment just how HUGE their baby was in comparison more of an attempted humble brag at their child / veiled dig at my child.

My second weighed more at birth at 7.7lb and has stayed on the 50th percentile but she was shorter than my son, so she still at 9 months gets comments on how small she is by literally everyone i meet. But she's too big for 6-9 month clothes, is still on the 50th percentile, so make it make sense!!?

Many posters on here assume it's just people generally remarking on a cute tiny baby but when you are a mother of a 'small' baby you know exactly what they are getting at. And yes I too find it rude, unhelpful and accusatory.

My daughter always gets the "oh she's so small" comments, and it's most definitely not because all babies are small. It's intended in a "she's much smaller than others her age" kind of way. I'm happy she's smaller than average, but the comments do still sometimes annoy me!