Behind every sports success is a pushy parent. Aibu to agree?

[Breakdancing]

https://non-perfectdad.co.uk/does-every-sport-success-have-a-pushy-parent-behind-them/

I would agree with this article to a certain extent.

Friend is a single parent. We and others help with lifts, minding, logistics.
A team sport or being part of a squad means lifts can be arranged, duties swapped, coaches take the team.
We have a couple of kids who’s parents struggle to come to stuff so we coaches usually take them or another parent does.

Actually, that’s not a bad thing anyway. We have 2 kids in 2 entirely different sports and do a lot of asking for favours and doing favours for other parents. Honestly though, I can see that the benefits far outweigh the inconvenience.
Having sporty teens means much of their spare time is filled doing something healthy that they enjoy, keeps them occupied, they’re learning to be part of teams, meeting lots of new people, learning to be competitive, learning to lose. And trust me, if they don’t like it we wouldn’t do it!
They can go get another hobby that doesn’t involve most weekends spent getting up at the crack of dawn and week day evenings driving them around to training.

I have to push just to get my son out the door to school in the morning, does that count he does have football training two nights a week and I do strongly encourage him to go even when he's tired and so on but it's not about wanting him to reach elite level. It's just about getting some exercise in and learning to stick at something, and all the other benefits that come with team sports.

I was wondering about that. When people talk about the sacrifices made 'as a family', I can't help thinking of the brother or sister who isn't the budding swimmer or whatever, who would rather have the family holiday sacrificed for the sport meets but doesn't get any say in it.
You wonder whether, in families where income is stretched by the expense of the one child's Olympic dreams, what is left for the dreams of any other children in the family.
Awesome though it would be to be the proud sister of an Olympian, it must be hard for parents with more than one child to make sure that any other children who might have talents for other things don't miss out on having their own skills developed because there isn't any money or time left for them.

I suspect that means you are on the inside and don't see it most of the time.

I played tennis. At one point I could, and did consistently in tournaments beat about half the county squad. I was never asked to join.

What was the difference between me and, for example Kate, who I'd always beaten easily 6-2, 6-2 or better)? I was several levels up on the rankings too. She played in the same club as the county squad's coach. All the others had similar reasons.

And that was one where there was an absolutely easy way to check.

I'm not, not was I then, that bothered I didn't get to play. I got plenty of other games. There was a certain satisfaction in beating his squad in tournaments matches in front of him though.😁

Wow, I'm impressed! May I ask what sort of community projects your son is involved in and how you found out about them? I'd love to get my children involved on helping the local community..
Thanks!

True. But I'd much rather have parents who will push me to achieve than those who'd let me be complacent. However, I do appreciate success means different things to different people so people should feel free to parent however works best for their families. Key point is they should also let others parents how they want to. In summary, people should perhaps focus on their own kids

Margaret I'm most definitely not on the inside of anything. I don't have a clue what I'm doing half the time 😂

Ds gets invited to stuff and I just complete the online forms and make sure he's where he's meant to be!

Yes, he's very lucky he does get some funding as nominated by his NGB.

But it has nothing to do with me knowing anyone or what's going on!

You’d know if you weren’t on the inside.

Like pp said with tennis your child would be left off squads others he’d beaten were invited to. Others would be put forward for the funding when he has better results.

other parents would be called in for meetings about their child’s future, when yours beat them in every comp.

it’s very labile as well. One day you’re filling in the forms and getting your child where they need to be, the next someone else is getting the emails and you’re not.

if you do get invited you find you are asked to foot the bill while others get it free.

thing is if you are on the outside you don’t question why as that just gets your child marked as trouble and the selections completely dry up.

Of course! The key thing for him has been wanting to help the homeless, so he has done fundraising to create summer care packages for them and then we took them to our local soup kitchen where they gave them to their clients. He’s now working on fundraising to do the same for winter care packages. He’s also really keen on being eco-friendly so has done a lot of litter picking. So all self-initiated really! Although he attends a special school and they have really celebrated his efforts and are now looking at making him their “fundraising lead” for charitable pursuits at school 🥰

I know a young cricketer playing at county level, multiple age groups above his actual age, on track for England etc. His younger sister has tagged along behind him since she was a toddler and has sacrificed so much.

@WeAreManyUArefew, depending on how much your young relative likes doing social media, maybe a Patreon or similar would work, with subscribers being given exclusive behind the scenes access to his journey to get to LA or the like. But that's not an approach for everyone.