To think a lot of homes are “soulless” and all people care about is size?

[Spicegirl1234]

I love homes that are full of personality, stuff picked up around the world in trips, fleamarket finds, family objects, homes that are not perfect but keep your eyes “busy” when looking and fully reflect the life of people that live within them and make you feel warm when you go in.
I very rarely come across such homes, the majority of the ones I see (in RL and online) tend to be very boring with no personality whatsoever and people mainly seem to be focussed on buying the biggest possible places with their money and then upgrading/extending etc rather than enjoying what they have and make it “theirs”.
Does anyone else feel this way about home decor?

You'll hate me. I used to buy souvenir knick knacks - a blanket, rug, plates. And I liked all the individual things. Still do. But in the end I gave a lot of them away as they weren't purposefully bought and didn't fit in with my actual style at home as I grew into my taste. Despite being beautiful items, they looked like eyesores in my actual home and looking at them made me feel a bit unsettled as they didn't fit in and felt like I was looking at a job - find a better place, redo the decorating to incorporate it better, pass on etc.

My home is a calm, colourful, practical, minimal and clutter free space. I have a few carefully chosen knick knacks that fit and make me smile and that i rotate. But stuff isn't happiness for me. Space, easy cleaning and purposeful spaces are my bliss.

It was a hard lesson and not for everyone. I'm not saying i don't have the odd mismatched item, I do. And I still buy trinkets IF I know exactly where they will go and how they will fit.

It also makes it easy to tell our DS "no" to random impulse purchases because we as adults just don't do that ourselves by routine so we aren't hypocritical.

He catches me looking at stuff sometimes and asks if I'm buying it and I'll say no, lll probably have forgotten about it next week or that I want to consider it a bit longer or that I can love something and appreciate its beautiful and not feel the need to own it.

My - as you would no doubt judge to be boring - home reflects my interests. I don't want my eyes kept 'busy' when I get home, quite the opposite. I work long hours in a mentally demanding job and like to spend my free time seeing friends and family, outside enjoying nature and being active. I like a calm, relaxing home which is easy to maintain and practical in terms of supporting my interests. I have no interest in going round flea markets or spending my time acquiring and curating stuff.

My parents' home is like yours, it works for them. They are happy to spend the time cleaning and tidying all their 'stuff' because the stuff itself gives them joy and they enjoy going round antique shops and markets and picking stuff out. I'm happy it makes them happy but it would make me stressed and unhappy. Different people want different things from their home. One isn't superior to another (excluding extreme issues like hoarding or particular health based needs).

I'd also like a larger house, it would allow me more space to host friends and family which again I value far above collecting stuff.

To me, lots of ‘things’ means clutter and dust. Surfaces are much easier when you don’t have to move a hundred things. Clutter makes me think of confusion, clear space is calming.

You're being judgmental and obviously feel that your style is the correct one. I disagree.

Well the OP has just called other people's homes boring and soulless. When in truth, others would call hers an eyesore.
Many people IMO don't even think about it. They have other priorities and just put things wherever.
I like ary and some carefully chosen pieces to draw the eye but loads and loads of crap like what the OP wants is just going to look like mess.. my house isn't a showcase of my personality.

I much prefer space to stuff. I like big windows, lots of light, a good view (I am lucky to live on the river and watch boats, paddleboaders, horses on the field opposite) etc.

I don't need loads of things in my home to bring personality. I fill my home with family and friends. They bring much more personality than trinkets and knick-knacks.

We've just come back from a holiday travelling across a few European countries. Didn't bring anything back with us as a souvenir. I'm not against bringing back souvenirs, but I don't feel obliged to find something just to give my eyes something to look at.

I agree OP. Looking on rightmove, trends for home decor have gone in a very bland, plain and dreary direction.

I'm not sure exactly when it changed and houses became so identical, bland and dull. Through the 70s, 80s and 90s people had more individual items on display and colour and patterned wallpaper.

I use Pinterest and fortunately there are still many inspirational homes and interiors there if you train it to your taste with the right searches. When I see stunning homes there that make use of antiques, plants, art, fabrics and natural materials, I can't grasp why anyone would stick with the tat found in a lot of shops nowadays.

I do appreciate that not everyone is interested in trawling flea markets, eBay or skips for treasure though!

Check out Jessie Burton's house on Instagram, she's got a very bold style.

Ps I disagree about needing money to achieve the boho or eclectic look. My friends and I have always gone for this look even back in the days we had hardly any money. It was cheaper to scour eBay and charity shops for second hand items. I couldn't have afforded new furniture so actually this look was the only option!

I think it's nice to have a mixture of both.
Too much clutter and a lot of things around stresses me out. I like minimalist stuff, but we do have plenty of pictures on the walls, fridge full of magnets from places we've been to and the kids school awards and artwork etc.
We do also have random ornaments and things where people ask either "Ooh where did you get that?" Or "Oh...what is it?" depending on the particular item 😅

I love my house, it's very much a riot of colour and thus I've found. In my living room I've papered my chimney breast with floral illustrations from a vintage book and instead of curtains I've got a sari I picked up on holiday above the window. I'm a glass artist so lots of bright colours and contrast. I also have a full on book case in every room as I love books and literature. Lots of plants too but I know my tastes are pretty extreme compared to most. My bathroom is jelly bean orange with turquoise fish wallpaper and a singing fish above the loo 😂

I hate clutter. My house is somewhere in the middle - minimally decorated with a variety of things acquired anywhere form Africa to Ikea. But we're not very old, so we haven't acquired masses of stuff yet, we might be less minimalist after a lifetime of acquiring stuff. I don't see the point in shopping for meaningless decor whether it be diamantes from B&M or car boot "antiques".

Not sure where I sit in this assessment.
I'm in the middle of purchasing a lovely big soulless new build and what I'm looking forward to most (apart from the luxury of finally having enough space for our family to function harmoniously, hopefully) is being able to bring out the family treasure.
I'm talking my late grandfathers bits he brought back from all over when he was a marine engineer in the 1940s and 50s, my grandmother's old display cabinet which was her pride and joy, my other grandfather's model warships he handmade to scale and I used to play with at the pond in the local park - pretty sure my uncle will let me have one if I put up a shelf big enough, other grandmothers grandfather clock that I've had in my loft for years...
DH has quite a bit of football memorabilia related to his late father, grandfather and even great grandfather that I know means a lot to him that will finally see the light of day.
None of this can be out in our current much older/smaller home as we just couldn't function around it and the walls would be coming in on us. I hate feeling cluttered and closed in. I'd also not ever be buying other people's stuff from flea markets just too have it there to look and have to dust..that means nothing to me, why would I bother?
I'll be buying some of my own stuff brand new just because I like it for whatever reason and maybe one day my own grandchild will have it in their home because it makes them think of me and smile. Nothing is manufactured with "soul". That comes with time and love.

Oooh great! I'm ahead of the game for once!

The thing is, it's only bland depending on how you decorate.

I have white walls, furniture, wooden, uniform picture frames in neat gallery blocks. All my colour comes from bold furniture, cutrtains, cushions and throws, and the actual art in the frames. I just have very little of it to maintain space. I also have some wild wallpaper but in muted, tasteful colours and in purposefully deigned nooks e.g. built in shelves with candles that light the space up beautifully. I also have discreet diffusers so it smells wonderful.

But if you looked at it on rightmove, a lot of people would consider it a soulless, minimal white box. But when the lights are down, the scents are on and world is shut out, it's a cosy, clutter free haven.

The trouble is, people that hate the minimalist thing don't often appreciate how cosy and comfortable a home can be and how thoughtfully designed some homes are. Depending on where you sit in my lounge, your gaze may fall on the tv(!), art, plants, a small collection of books I want to read etc, all with beautiful bookmarks ready to use. There is also always somewhere to put a mug (on a coaster that I've carefully chosen), a blanket in reach. You just don't see it all when you walk in the door.

I’ve spent years and years in 3 different houses having rooms that have bright vibrant colours on the walls, full of second hand crap and niknaks….eventually it drove me mad.. the clutter and shit everywhere really got me down.

now my house is a lot better, I still have a front room that has a feature wall that is a dark navy blue and yellow and orange autumn themes, book shelves but the nik marks are mostly gone. My room is lilac but the rest is grey/white and on the way to being minimalistic. It’s heaven and so calming. My carpets upstairs are grey and I have subtle colours as as accents.

everyone’s different

I think you're conflating two totally different things, OP. My house is pretty minimalist in style and lots of people would probably think it lacked personality. I like minimalist style and find it relaxing. What has that got to do with caring about the size of your house? It seems weird to accuse people with 'empty, soulless' houses of being materialistic compared with people who spend loads of money on 'stuff'.

OP, let me ask you. Would you be happy to have your home critiqued for the things you have/don't have in it? I doubt it.

All you've done (which may have well been your intention) is to attract a certain type of poster to add their own moronic "I donnnn't liiiiike it" comments about things that other posters may well have and love in their ho9mes. Slow handclap for you.

Editing for the posters who don't mindlessly jump in to denigrate other people's homes - and there seem to be a few; kudos to them.

“I love homes that are full of personality, stuff picked up around the world in trips, fleamarket finds, family objects, homes that are not perfect but keep your eyes “busy” when looking and fully reflect the life of people that live within them and make you feel warm when you go in.”

And for your home that’s perfectly acceptable but not everyone likes that. To me what you described sounds cluttered which I hate but that’s ok because it’s your home not mine so I won’t judge. You only need to concern yourself with your home not anyone else’s. We all decorate to our own tastes

An Art Deco bathroom in a thing of beauty

I have an art deco bathroom, its beautiful, and I get lots of compliments on it, but there is zero clutter anywhere as I cant stand clutter.

Just because you have no clutter or dusty knick knacks on every available surface does not mean something lacks character or is soul-less. My house has beautiful refurbished wood floors, sky lights and many original features but that would all be ruined if it had clutter everywhere because you wouldnt actually notice the character of the house, all you would see is just "stuff" everywhere.

Mine too. Lol at all the " doan judge" comments which are swiftly combined with " non minimalist homes are cluttered shit pits". Love what you love, minimalist is in so people feel they can show that off, confirmation bias is the result.

I've done a little of both: some size and some objects to my own taste to make it my own. My home is not oversized though and I know where you are coming from. Hey, don't be envious of size. We can do any size with the budget we have, depending which area we live in. Relax. It is not a competition. Fill your tummy with good food today, go out and do what makes you happy. There always will be poorer and richer

Firstly, a lot of houses you see online have been purposely decluttered and depersonalised in order to sell them.

Secondly, creativity is a talent not many people have. It's not a case of "try harder", some people, myself included are not arty and even if we appreciate other people's efforts we wouldn't have a clue how to make a space look good ourselves. I find arty types tend not to understand this, they are like but it's easy, just do what you love. But I genuinely don't have a creative bone in my body. I'm not repressing my creativity to fit in, I just don't have it.

I judge homes by how welcoming the homeowners are. Good conversation, plenty to eat & drink, that’s what gives homes a soul.
I barely notice the decor.