To think a lot of homes are “soulless” and all people care about is size?

[Spicegirl1234]

I love homes that are full of personality, stuff picked up around the world in trips, fleamarket finds, family objects, homes that are not perfect but keep your eyes “busy” when looking and fully reflect the life of people that live within them and make you feel warm when you go in.
I very rarely come across such homes, the majority of the ones I see (in RL and online) tend to be very boring with no personality whatsoever and people mainly seem to be focussed on buying the biggest possible places with their money and then upgrading/extending etc rather than enjoying what they have and make it “theirs”.
Does anyone else feel this way about home decor?

I think having a strong, independent interior design style is quite difficult and not very common (just like a lot of people don’t have a strong sense of personal fashion style and tend to wear whatever is convenient, comfortable and smart).

yep

Does anyone else feel this way about home decor?

No.
I hate clutter. It attracts dust and makes me feel claustrophobic.

I grew up in a house that was so full of clutter and dust. I prefer light and airy and spacious.

That said my house does not look like a show home. I have bookshelves filled with books, photos, paintings, plants etc, but I don't have clutter.

@Spicegirl1234 You do you, but please don't judge other people's home decor preferences.

Your soulless is my carefully considered

Your personality is my stress inducing “stuff”

The oddest home I’ve ever been in was that of some neighbours from years ago. We thought they had just moved in (as had we) the first time we were in their house, because other than the furniture, no possessions at all were evident. The hall didn’t have any stray shoes or keys or bags on the hall stand, there were no pictures on any walls, the kitchen had completely bare work surfaces and table, not even a fruit bowl or mug tree (kettle taken from a drawer and returned to it), the dining room had a long table and ten chairs, and bare walls. So far, so minimal, you might say, but their taste wasn’t at all ‘minimal’ — it was chintzy floral fabrics, flouncy patterned blinds and curtains, elaborately-patterned wallpaper, patterned carpets. Is minimalist cottagecore a thing?

It's horses for courses really. Some people don't want to put in a lot of time and energy and just look around for what's popular and do that, which is fair enough.

The same way some people like to drive nice cars and keep them pristine, whereas, while we could afford a nice car if we wanted to, we just consider it a thing to get us from A to B so we drive around in a battered 2nd hand tin box we've had for nearly ten years, it's just not where we put our effort in life.

My house is probably to your approval. I have spent a lot of time thinking very carefully about how to decorate my house and it's been a slow process. I've inherited some furniture, trawled flea markets and antique shops for others and my home is full of things I love and reflect our lives, interests and personalities.

However, much as I wouldn't or couldn't live in a grey box and find a lot of what's fashionable soulless, I try very hard not to judge. People like what they like and they live with what makes them happy.

I do wonder if the relative cheapness of redecorating and the transient nature of our lives means that people's homes are just a reflection of how we live now. Gone I suppose are the times of owning one house you worked your life for and filled with your worldly goods. My grandparents' generation all lived in houses of hand me down furniture and adored trinkets, Methodist embroideries and hand made rag rugs. It was all so individual and hard won. Everything mended and cherished and little thrown away. I acknowledge of course that it was also bloody hard work and money being tight and no free access to other options was so hard. But it does play a part into the way we live.

There's a conversation to be had about this social change but the tone of your op will just attract a lot of knee jerk ire.

OP you're a superior person with exquisite taste that has been crafted through years of independent travel.

Happy now?

Or maybe you're just a snob. I'm not sure.

Me too. I dont like loads of clutter in my house - it makes me feel anxious. I like seeing wide open spaces, its mentally calming and attractive to me.

Having bits and bobs from flea markets everywhere doesnt indicate "soul" to me in any shape or form. People can have whatever the fck they want in their own home and a lack of clutter certainly doesnt indicate a lack of soul LOL

Genuinely astounded the op started a thread saying she can’t beleive folks buy big houses and don’t decorate to her personal taste.

i mean seriously/ 😂

My dad refers to lots of pretty knicknacks as "froo froo", pointless stuff.

Twice I have stayed briefly with gay men whose homes were stuffed with froofroo. One of them had travelled around the world, had multiple careers, met Prince Charles, he had such an interesting history & many of his things were beautiful. All nicely dust free, I add. His garden was also stuffed with plant pots, he just liked lots of stuff. But he said he needed to downsize & I think he was going to struggle knowing what stuff to keep.

I will have a soul-less house because I'm kind of indifferent about sentimental stuff. I want to find my stuff, I want useful stuff, I have too much useful stuff so I'm not going to have additional stuff just because it's pretty or memorable. I don't care about decor.

I personally can't bear clutter and tat . A house full of stuff from a flea market would have me on edge, all that dust! No thank you.
I'm not that interested in decor, I like my home to be neat, tidy and functional, not a trip hazard!
Each to their own. Luckily I'm not as judgemental as OP 🙄

@Frasers ,

Why are you astounded?

It is a perfectly reasonable and polite OP about the difference between a house and a home and interesting to discuss.

That is the whole point of a discussion forum, to discuss things!

And judging by the number of posts, including yours, it is a worthwhile conversation.

With the owner saying. My home isn't tidy but it's clean. No if it's not tidy it can't be clean

Haha yes!

I think there's a difference too between having knick knacks and bit and pieces you've gradually amassed over time that have meaning and doing a sweep of The Range for Buddha statues and twee signage to create a particular look. In the end, as pp have said it's totally up to the individual and you do you.

Having dusty clutter everywhere surely doesnt indicate a home with a soul, it just means people have put literally everything they have ever bought on display.

By that rationale, hoarders must have the most soul of everyone I guess?

I expect that most people would find my furnishings old fashioned.

When we moved to the county we live in now 27 years ago we bought some pine bookshelves, coffee table and Wi-Fi unit.

We still have them as there is nothing wrong with them and we can't afford to replace them. I don't view furniture as a fashion accessory, but as something practical. I would love some light oak furniture but it seems like an unnecessry expense to replace something that still works perfectly well for us.

And dust.

I honestly think there is far too much judging (on here and in rl) of the homes people live in.

They are safe (hopefully), secure (hopefully) and comfortable (hopefully). That is all that is needed and the rest is just amusing ourselves to waste time because there are no bears to hide from. And sometimes, it's judging someone else as wanting so we feel a bit better about ourselves.

I have a friend who has a spacious house that is light and airy. All her walls are white. However, she is very artistic and uses the blank canvas to offset paintings (she paints) and the odd ornament carefully placed here and there. In this case less is more because the ornaments and paintings really stand out and draw the eye.

If it was full of the kind of clutter the OP describes it would just look like clutter jumbled together.

Because it’s incredibly judgey, he or she is judging other folks homes, and deciding they don’t meet her personal taste. I certainly don’t go into my friends or families houses and do this. If you do, then you do yoh, but I’m astounded people actually behave like this. And if you read the posts most folks are talking about their own homes, not judging other people’s like the op

and as usual people like the op don’t want to post images because they don’t want others to judge like they are.

I wonder if the horror of "dust" is part of the whole "anti-bac" must wash towels after every use, shower three times a day thing we see on here a lot. That "clutter" is a sign of a undisciplined mind or life. I also think as a pp said that the Pinterest type thing encourages seasonal changes, so the B&M, Range, Dunelm type shops have "autumn" stuff out now and we're all.supposed to spend ££ on the same candlesticks and throws and glass dishes we already have but in orange. And then again in gold or silver in winter and then in pastels come March.

Gid the last thing I want my home to do is 'keep my eyes busy'. My home is my sanctuary from the hell outside. It has things in it, of course but not bursting at the seems. Do you have a poor memory OP? I was present for my life, therefore I remember a very good chunk of it, I don't particularly need things strewn about to jog my memory. I love it when I visit any home where the person has been able to make it look the way they most like, what I like in a space is irrelevant to a space that isn't mine. Your taste is no better than anyone elses. Maybe don't be so uppity?

Well mine is full of crap, but it does look homely. I think I'd like to be more minimalist but I have pets and a 6 yo 😂😂

I hate what I would call clutter in my house I think it’s just individual taste - I see beautiful homes with lots of interesting things and that’s amazing for them but with small kids I really value space, easy to clean and I try to clear out pretty frequently. I also have the kids paintings up everywhere and have left up some fancy things that I don’t want broken that I’m sure ruins the aesthetic. But it makes us happy and all the people we invite to our house are polite and tell us it’s lovely 🤣