My 17 year old is driving me to despair. He’s got an apprenticeship and is on a decent wage for his age. He lives at home, we make him a packed lunch everyday for work, buy him clothes, shoes toiletries etc and pay his phone bill £56 an month and still take him away on every family holiday. For his 17th birthday we payed for him to undergo an intensive driving course so that he would be driving asap as he was really excited to learn to drive. The course cost in excess of £1500, and we had also given him a car. He passed his test first time. Prior to him learning to drive we had already had discussions on how expensive car insurance would be. We agreed that if we got a few quotes he would save half and we would pay the other half. The day he passed his test we were setting up the insurance and asked him to bank transfer his share. He told us that he didn’t have any money in his account and had not saved as per the agreement. Not to cause any further disagreements and to take the shine off him passing his test - I paid the half we promised and then set up a direct debit to cover the other half which he agreed to pay.
we are now 8 months down the road and he has only paid one months insurance.
since passing his test his car has needed 4 new tyres which I had to pay for, he broke a sensor which I also paid for, he didn’t pay his road tax when it was due so I paid for this also, and its recently had to have an MOT which it failed and then required £560 worth of repairs - he had cracked his rear lights and water damage burnt out the eletrics and he needed a new underarm as he has damaged the under of the car on speed bumps. There were also a few other bits and pieces that needed looking at. I warned him prior to the MOT that it needed some repair work and he should make sure he saved. When we picked the car up again the same old story he didn’t have any money to pay so I ended up footing the bill.
I then made a payment plan for him to repay £50 a week towards the repairs and reminded him that he would also need to start paying his insurance direct debit. We are now 4 weeks down the road and I am yet to receive any money for the repairs and he’s missed yet another insurance payment.
I'm seriously considering cancelling his insurance but then I would feel bad taking away his independence and he needs his car for work.
I keep asking for the money and he says things like ‘you must really hate me to be going on and on at em all the time’ or ‘You make my life so difficult asking for all this money all the time when I just want to go out like a normal 17 year old and enjoy!’ It’s really getting me down and causing a lot of atmosphere in the house between us and my husband.
AIBU if I cancelled his phone bill direct Debit and his insurance and refuse to pay for it anymore?