To want my adult niece and nephew to call my Aunty Emma?

[egaley]

AIBU? Am I old fashioned?

I have an adult nephew and niece (28 and 26). They have always called me Aunty Emma.

We were having a big family meal and my cheeky nephew called me just “Emma” when he wanted to say something. I corrected him and asked him why he called me Emma, my name is Aunty Emma!

I think it’s up to the individual really. Some nieces and nephews will carry on using ‘auntie’ and ‘uncle’ into adulthood, some will drop it at some stage and some never really used it in the first place. I find it very weird how many people seem to think that a close relationship hinges on using a ‘title’ 🤢 I am very close indeed to my brothers children but they only sporadically call me auntie muffin as opposed to ‘just’ muffin. It doesn’t make any odds to me, we still love each other dearly!

Dropping the titles suggests you see no value in the familial relationship. Using the title is a recognition of the role of that person in your life and if you don't think they are important there's your fragmentation.

Dropping titles for aunts and uncles is a bit like those trendy parents in the 60s and 70s who insisted their children call them by their first names. Or those that laugh at people who call their parents mummy and daddy. It's all trying to imply you are oh so modern and progressive. But you're throwing away the baby with the bathwater. The title is not childish, it's a mark of the importance of your relationship.

I think its OK either way. My DH has one uncle still alive, well into his 90s, and he is called "Uncle Ted" by most family members, even by wider family.

I have nieces and nephews and great-nieces and great-nephews. I was always "create" to my nieces and nephews as there wasn't a big age gap between us. My great-nieces and nephews called me "aunty create" when they were young, but once they got to their teens I started signing cards as just "create".

I wouldn't personally insist on it, but if it's a family tradition then I would continue to use it where appropriate to the older generation but I would be telling the younger generation not to do it for me.

I am 70, my niece and nephew have never called me aunt, neither do my great nieces.

I’m 40s and generally call uncles and aunties as such. Sometimes I drop it and just use names though. My kids (late teens) seem to have mostly dropped it for their uncles and aunties, though for mine (their greats) they seem to usually use it.

I think it depends on your culture. I know of a few cultures where its seen as a mark of respect, and any good family friend is referred to as auntie / uncle.

If you're white British then I think you're being OTT, it's unnecessarily formal

This post isn’t for real…..but if it was then very unreasonable….I have 13 nephews and neices and 15 great nephews and neices…..we are a very close family….no one ever calls me aunty

Mine call me auntie and my adult DC also call theirs auntie and uncle. I'm 55 and still use auntie for women who had an 'auntie role' like my mums best friends. It's very common in my circle. I wouldn't insist though.

I’m in my 40’s and still call my Aunties “Auntie”
Just because I like it. But I wouldn’t correct my niece calling me by my name only so YABU

YABU! It's totally normal to call your aunt and uncle by their first names once you get older than say 16. They aren't children anymore!

My children are 12 and 14 they have always just used their names. Not sure why really.

I’m in my 30’s and still call my Auntie and Uncle, Auntie and Uncle .

I think I’d feel weird just calling them by their first name, but that’s just me!

I think it’s entirely a matter of personal preference. If someone preferred being called “David” to “Dave”, you would respect that. If an aunt wants her nieces and nephews to address her with the honorific “auntie”, then politeness should dictate that they will do so. I know it varies from family to family - in mine, we say auntie and uncle; not everyone does. I don’t think there’s any prescriptive right or wrong answer here - but if the OP wants to be called auntie, it’s rather rude of her niece and nephew not to.

Years ago, I was mocked for calling my aunt, 'Aunty Emma', when I started at Oxford. I didn't realise that it was such a class thing.

I have umpteen aunts and uncles and even more cousins and we all still use Aunty and uncles. I’m practically 40! But then we are in Lancashire where you are aunty/uncle to your friends kids too.

Same! I'm 60 and wouldn't dream of calling any of my aunts/uncles by their first name only. To be fair, I don't have many left now, but they will always be 'Aunty Joyce/Uncle Frank' (or whatever!)

My own nieces and nephews call me Aunty and my own children call theirs aunty or uncle.

In all honesty, I wouldn't be offended if they dropped the title (maybe a bit sad, but not offended)...but I can't see it happening 🤷‍♀️ It's obviously something that's personal to each family dynamic I guess.

Not sure why most posters feel it's outdated or ridiculous for adult 'children' to still use the title...your aunts and uncles are still your aunts and uncles whether you're 3 or 33!

In my family it’s a sign of affection.

But withdrawing that affection and being openly hostile because someone doesn’t call you ‘auntie’? It’s not very affectionate!

No you're not. You are their aunty and it's nice to be acknowledged as such and it's a sign of affection. My own nephews are all over 40 now and still call me aunt and their children also call me aunt. I called my own aunts 'aunt (insert christian name here) until their dying day.
The folks who have eaten a sociology book for breakfast (or worse have read one) can just do one!

We all still use Auntie and Uncle in our family.

Don’t be daft.

I have 2 nieces (sisters), aged 23 and 19. 23N calls me "Auntie Vicky" and 19N calls me "Vicky".

I prefer just my first name but am happy to leave it to their preference.

I’m 37 and I still call my dad’s aunties and uncles auntie x and uncle y! Let alone my own aunties and uncles!!

My adult DNs still call me Auntie Hat and my adult DCs call my DSis the nickname she's had since my eldest couldn't pronounce 'auntie'. In fact, my DIL had no idea that the nickname wasn't my DSis's real name!

I think you just have to go with the flow. My aunt told me to stop using 'aunt' and 'uncle' and just call them by their names when I was about 21.

This made me smile. I’m the same with my adult nephews who I absolutely adore and have an amazing relationship with.
noone else has the privilege of that title and so I’ve told them tongue in cheek that even when they are 70 they have to use it. They fully indulge me, because I’m ace.