Friend thinks I've been "sneaky " am I wrong?

[redredridingout]

It's my best friends 30th birthday
She is having afternoon tea on Saturday for her close friends and then a party on the night.
She invited my friend (who comes on nights out with us ) to the party on the night.
She doesn't meet my friend alone only with me.
My friend lives 45 mins away from us and 1 hour from party venue and also doesn't know anybody but me and my best friend at this party.
So I said she could stay at my house to save taxi fare and I would drop her off next day.

I've decided I'm just going to go to the afternoon tea and skip the night party - so text friend saying I wasn't going now.
Friend is annoyed saying she can't go without me going as she knows nobody and it's too far for her to get home /has bought friend gift and bought an outfit.
Surely that's not my problem?
And should be up to me if I don't go
Aibu ?

Does anyone have the link to that thread? Please?

Put it this way, me and ex bf once went to a wedding, we took another couple who didn't drive, I was designated driver.
Halfway through the night bf found venue hotel had some rooms free at half price so we decided to stay over.
Rather than screw the other couple over (who couldn't afford to stay over) I still drove them home as agreed then drove back to hotel, approx 90 mins drive.

The person described in the op has not been sneaky but they have been bloody shitty.

Reverses should be banned. So tedious.

Yes you are in the wrong.

If this is not a reverse, then you're being pretty shit. At the very least, still keep the option of taking her to the evening do and letting her stay at yours.

Anyone got a link to the thread being referred to please?

I see... yep it does sound exactly the same. 🤦‍♀️

I don't think 'sneaky' is the word I'd use, but rude, and selfish, yes.

I'd be telling you f right off

I can understand you driving the couple home, since you had promised...... but why on earth did you drive back for your selfish boyfriend? The mind boggles...

Ah it was this one:

To be annoyed with friend cancelling last minute ?
7 replies

wardrobescmose · 21/07/2024 17:16
My good friend introduced me to her friend around 10 years ago.
We are friends but not as close as she is to good friend.
This girl is getting married on Wednesday and my good friend (we will call her Kelly ) is invited to the wedding and night do.
The wedding is only for a small number of people so totally understand why I was only invited to night do.
It's a hour away from me and I don't have a car,so was getting public transport (bus ) and then a taxi.
I said to my good friend a month ago it's quite far for me to get too and she made a song and dance "oh you have to come,it's her wedding ,we will be together ,I know you don't know anyone but it will be great ,why don't you stay at mine on the night "

So anyway booked the day off work
Bought my outfit
She text saying "sorry I've decided I'm not going to bother with the night do ,only the wedding "

That's it ...so I've taken a day off work
The bride thinks I'm going
I've bought a outfit
I know nobody else and she's turned around and said that
Aibu to be annoyed here ?

I'm guessing she fancied a night in a nice hotel with her bf (not sure why you're calling him "selfish").

If your friend is only calling you "sneaky" you're getting off lightly.

Yep you’re out of order.

Selfish in expecting her to drive for hours, late at night, after attending a wedding? I'm not sure any hotel, however nice, could make up for this...

What, it is your best friend's 30th birthday, and you are going to the afternoon tea only but not the night out??? So you let down best friend and your other friend.

Soon you'll have no friends. You are a self absorbed misery guts.

You’re either a really crap friend or you’re posting reverses which is really annoying and usually banned. Which is it?

Can she still stay at yours? If not, that's not sneaky but it's rotten to let her down like that.

YABU. You've spoilt things for your friend and the friend. And let down birthday friend. Pretty bad IMHO.

YABU but I also call reverse.

YABU and a crappy friend. Although the other friend should just go by herself and not rely on just your company.

You're also a crappy friend to not go to your best friends party. So I call BS on this thread.

I'm still new to the site what do you all mean reverse posting?

Yes you are being unreasonable. I wouldn't be happy with you if you were my friend and I'd probably reconsider why I wanted to be friends with you atall.