Parents not watching their children at soft play centres.

[Crystalbabe]

Will start with saying I know some people are against soft play for other reasons. This post isn’t about that.

Took my little boy to soft play yesterday. A mum walks in with 2 kids around say 2 and 4 years old. She sits in the sitting area near the soft play and lets them in alone. They are both causing havoc, throwing toys down the slides which hit another child and at one point the 2 year old was trying to go down the big slide head first to which the 4 year old was shouting out to their mum and in the end as I was near her 2 year old boy I had to grab him for her away from the slide as she was shouting “can somebody stop him!”

My DS is my first child and I’ve only taken him soft play about 5 times, but these situations where parents don’t watch their kids and they cause issues has happened twice now (the other time was a 4-5 year old keep shoving a toddler in the ball pit with no parent in site apart from me who told the older kid to stop)

YABU - Parents should be able to let their kids go into soft play unsupervised it’s just one of them things, it should be safe

YANBU - Parents should be watching their children and not expecting other parents to watch their kids (lol)

I agree. I’ve had a child that must have been at least four years old shout at my son for playing with a toy that he wanted. Parents nowhere in sight. My son is one and we were in the under 18 months section so he shouldn’t have been there anyway. I think some children can be trusted to play independently. I certainly wouldn’t have behaved like that at that age. But surely parents know their own children and what their behaviour is like. If you know your child may be rough with other children or otherwise behave poorly there’s no excuse for not watching them closely and intervening when necessary.

I don't take my kids to soft plays because they're hell on earth.

On the rare occasion I have suffered through them (party where I've had to stay, on holiday and it was raining), I've sat drinking coffee but kept an eye on them. They're aged between 4 and 13. Obviously the eldest doesn't go anymore.

They know not to go in the baby area. When they were too young to go in the big kids area they would stay in the toddler area where I've kept a closer eye on them, but not sat directly with them.

Some kids are just feral though. My kids have ended up hurt because of other kids shoving, or my kids have ended up coming to me with another child saying they've found them crying and can I find their parent. That annoys me because while it's sweet of my child to be looking out for them, it's impacted on their playtime

My oldest child has a hidden disability so until the age of 5 I would always accompany him on the larger soft play frame. I’m a bit irked to think that other parents might have been judging me for it.

I never encountered another adult ‘bouldering around’ and knocking children over on the big frames. The ones I saw were simply playing with their children and making sure they were ok.

I wish I could have left my older child and sat with a coffee, and have no issue with other parents doing this! But I also think it’s fine for parents to accompany their own child if they think this best.

The gaps must be huge to see that level of detail. Quick flashes of kids is all you see at ours.

I agree. Adults are usually simply playing with their children.

The number of times kids try and engage with me when I don’t know them makes me think children might like adults in there with them more than several on this thread think.

Soft play is hell on earth. It's easy to find the parent of the feral kids, they're the ones sat drinking coffee with their head in their phones.

@Rfthyhuj

The gaps must be huge to see that level of detail. Quick flashes of kids is all you see at ours.

Soft plays are not difficult to see inside

Maybe this is where the differing views come from. That one looks quite visible and quite small. This is our local one. You can only see the kids whilst they’re at the outskirts. Certainly if you’re in this ship you can’t be seen unless you go to the nets and look down.

nice try
but no, playing with your kids doesn't make you like a total bellend.

Most normal adults are able not to shove little ones out of the way and not to be a nuisance you know?

Kids play with kids, sometimes play with their parents, big deal. What makes you superior for "playing in the sand" 😂😂

Other children who try to jump in and play with the only adult giving their kid some attention are a nuisance. Too much effort for their parents to play with them for a bit, how sad.

if your children haven't mastered basic manners and only behave like total bullies, then yes, you should be in there supervising and being feral.

You know the difference, all the kids do. Most children know how to take turn but sadly there's always a little brat trying to spoil the fun. We all know what kind of parents they have.

I remember once chatting to a couple of other mums at soft play as we were watching our kids from a short distance- there was one kid being an absolute terror and we were moaning about parents that don’t watch their kids.

then one said “omg and now that child pushed that little one down the slide!” And I realised it was my older child pushing his brother right on cue 🤣

But yes, it’s my pet peeve. My older boy is 5 and I can now trust him but only recently! And I still keep an eye from a distance/check in on him regularly. But he is generally quite sensitive and the worst he will do is generally find some poor unsuspecting child and chat their ears off (unless you are his brother 😅)

I am sorry but moaning about someone for playing with their kids rather than sitting on your arse and ignoring them? Not the superior one here.

I am soooo glad my son is past that stage. I have quite a few incidents but the one that sticks in my mind was the six or seven year old boy that walked up to my son and shoved him over hard before I could react. My son got up smiled at me and toddled off. The boy turned to me and said “why isn’t he crying? I wanted him to cry” 😡. When he went for my son again I took him back to his childminder and told her what he had done, she just shrugged.

Well, at my local soft play, there is a big sign, saying 'no adults on the equipment', so we don't have much of a choice! It's on multiple levels and the kids just disappear into it, and the adults cross their fingers and hope for the best!

I really don't think it's superior parenting to insert yourself into children's play in a place that's not intended for adults. It's important that they play without grown-ups too and develop that independence.

They can play with their parents at home, the beach, the forest, the park, the playground, trampoline and inflatable parks etc etc etc.

@Epicaricacy

Another poster who lacks basic reading comprehension skills

but no, playing with your kids doesn't make you like a total bellend.

It's quite clearly context specific. You don't need to play with your child in every single situation in life. Soft plays are for children to run around in, not full grown adults.

Good! Somewhere with some bloody sense

It’s the same in playgrounds but yes, worse at soft play centres.

I went to a soft play place recently for dds friends birthday parties. There’s a little part that had balls and basketball nets in it. We went in and this lad (about 6/7 years old) started full pelting the balls, kicking them as hard as he could. One ball hit dd on the back of her leg, one hit me on my shoulder. I gave him a stern telling off but he just looked at me & carried on doing it, so we left. He ended up hurting another lad about 5 mins later who was crying in pain, rubbing his back. A random parent went up to the crying lad to comfort him & ask where his parents were. They were completely oblivious, sat at a table chatting. The lad who was kicking the ball eventually got turfed out by his dad but it went on for way too long because no one was paying attention.

@Rfthyhuj

If a child can't be trusted to play in there on their own then they shouldn't be going. That is like the soft plays I remember going to when they first opened in Scotland, with drop slides and so on. Adults did not go in.

My nephew can be trusted, he just likes me to go in and play with him. Loads of parents do it, and I’ve never seen them get in the way. The kids like it.

At ours the smaller children are allowed on the big side with adult supervision during the off peak school hours. I can’t believe people feel so strongly about people playing with their children.

@Rfthyhuj

I can’t believe people feel so strongly about people playing with their children.

Again with the total lack of comprehension/woeful misrepresentation. Where have I said I don't think people should play with their children? 🙄 This is specifically about soft plays.

If you jump about in a soft play when there are only 3 other children in there, fine. Knock yourself out.

I think it's ridiculous of adults to climb about in them when soft plays are busy. Previous posters have said their local soft plays have signs up saying adults are not allowed. It's a bloody liability when a 15 stone man is knocking children over because the place is rammed. Save playing with your kids for where it's appropriate.

I can’t believe people feel so strongly about people playing with their children in the soft play, then.

@Rfthyhuj

Believe it baby 🙌🏻

Mixture of both...the 4 year is certainly ok to be on his own in soft play...the 2 year old needs watching.