Parents not watching their children at soft play centres.

[Crystalbabe]

Will start with saying I know some people are against soft play for other reasons. This post isn’t about that.

Took my little boy to soft play yesterday. A mum walks in with 2 kids around say 2 and 4 years old. She sits in the sitting area near the soft play and lets them in alone. They are both causing havoc, throwing toys down the slides which hit another child and at one point the 2 year old was trying to go down the big slide head first to which the 4 year old was shouting out to their mum and in the end as I was near her 2 year old boy I had to grab him for her away from the slide as she was shouting “can somebody stop him!”

My DS is my first child and I’ve only taken him soft play about 5 times, but these situations where parents don’t watch their kids and they cause issues has happened twice now (the other time was a 4-5 year old keep shoving a toddler in the ball pit with no parent in site apart from me who told the older kid to stop)

YABU - Parents should be able to let their kids go into soft play unsupervised it’s just one of them things, it should be safe

YANBU - Parents should be watching their children and not expecting other parents to watch their kids (lol)

And also, you've maybe not got to the stage where your child is faster than you. You can't jog after them or stand there bleating 'careful!' all day long.

If your kid is too small to go in soft play structures without an adult, they're too small, I'd say. Don't expect parents of older kids to try to throw themselves through the course trying to keep up with kids, just in case they jump somewhere!

Deliberate meanness is a different question.

Like I say, by the time your 22mo is 5, you might be ready to sit and trust to her judgment rather than attempt to police the whole time.

From speaking to my sister who lives in England I think this might be a cultural difference with Ireland, but adults shouldn't be in the frame. If your DC needs an adult to help them, they're too small for that section and shouldn't be there.

If your DC are prone to misbehaviour you should be keeping an eye from the outside, but one of the main points of these places is to let kids go and play without adult interference in an environment that's physically safe for them.

The 2 year old should have been under constant supervision.

A well behaved 4 year old should be a le to be unsupervised but clearly not the one you saw!

It depends on the age of the child. The 2 year old should be supervised but once they get to about 4/5 then the kids get to roam and the parents (mum) gets to enjoy her coffee and her kindle.

Softplay is for four and five year olds barrelling around the place, that's literally the purpose. 4 and 5 year olds shouldn't be in the baby bit, but a 2yo shouldn't be in the bigger ballpit either, that's just dangerous.

A little boy body slammed my LG today and his parents wasn't there to watch him or his siblings..she then had a go at me as I reported it lol even though half of the soft play seen it. Even said I shouldn't be watching her even tho there's a massive sign where she was standing to say watch your kids! She's 2 so yes I will watch her and turns out she didn't like it when I asked where was she? Parents should parent their kids and stop blaming other parents for being annoyed especially when a child was injuried.

I let mine play and don't go in with them... but I sit nearby and if I see anything untoward I intervene. I would remove my child if they were in anyway hurting another child too.

Another bug bear of mine is someone who lets their older children go into the toddler section.

I don't think adults should be allowed to clamber about in these places. If your child is too young to get on with it themselves then they need to stay in the smaller areas or not come at all.

I remember as a child when soft plays first became a thing in this country. You went when you were about 6 or 7 and older and you would never have seen an adult in there. Parents sat at tables and chatted and the children got on with it themselves. Now the place is crawling with adults clambering about like idiots.

OP, I'm with you on this one ...

... but it also does make me chuckle ironically 😆

On one hand you have parents dramatically dragging their offspring away from strangers and acting as if everyone wants to hurt their child

Then you have usually the same parents abandoning their kids at soft play, at the beach, by the pool, in restaurants, when on the phone, etc.

I wish they'd make their bloody minds up 🙄

Soft play isn't for fun parent-child bonding time. Adults aren't supposed to be on the frame. Many many other ways to have fun with your DC, soft play is for adult-free fun, which is also important.

To everyone responding to my comment here, I should clarify the softplay I take her to is just a small one for under 5s only so she's not out of place and most of the children are under 3 - I'm not trying to take her into one for much older children.

Not getting at the children at all, as I said I know they obviously get excited, as does my own!

I just think parents should always be keeping an eye where possible, especially when your child is one of the bigger ones amongst a lot of little ones.

Soft play is where lazy parents shine.

Normal parents adapt supervision based on the place, age and number in the group. CF just dump their kids and expect others to deal with them, the way they will expect school to parent instead of them.

I have seen little kids near hysterical because they were stuck somewhere but mummy was too busy posting selfies on social media, kids hurt or having accidents but completely ignored by their stupid parents.
It's also a thriving environment for little bullies.

It's even worst when you go and play with your own little kids and you attract many kids who are desperate for adult attention.

Yes, parents should supervise at all time, in a reasonable manner. Many don't.

Ignore them, have fun with your kids. Soon they will be old enough to be supervised from far away, and when they are in a group, you know there will always be one who can come and alert you if there's problem.

Thank you everyone for your responses and I agree with the comment above.

As long as you’re keeping an eye on them, even if that’s sitting outside with a coffee then that’s better than letting them run off and picking them up an hour later.

Our soft play is usually 3 and under or some are 5 and under that we take my son too. There are usually 8-10 year olds running around sometimes with no parents in sight telling them not to go in.

I agree with comments saying 4 year old doesn’t need a parent to go around with them constantly, but I do think the 2 year old needed someone with him. He literally threw a toy microwave down the slide hitting a child.

YANBU

I'm old enough to remember soft play (and park playgrounds) before mobile phones became popular.

Most parents would watch their kids, rather than bury their heads in their phones.

@MinniesCountdown

Why do they look like idiots for having fun with their child?

Parents don't look like idiots for having fun with their child. They look like idiots if they're climbing around in a soft play. It's not for adults.

Under 4/5 they need to be in a small soft play or not at soft play at all.

I occasionally take my nearly 3 year old son to a very small soft play for under 5s. I can see him everywhere in it as it's so small. I don't take him to big soft plays yet as he can't be left to climb around on his own. Too many parents bring young children to these and crawl about after them. It should be banned.

Parents don't look like idiots for having fun with their child. They look like idiots if they're climbing around in a soft play. It's not for adults.

Looking at the many soft plays who have "adult evenings" for various parties, you are clearly wrong.

Soft plays are fun. Obviously not the baby section.

I see this when taking my grandchildren to soft play. Mothers sat scrolling phones with their backs to the apparatus while kids, some only looking 18 months old, wandering into the big children's area. One little boy age about 3 managed to get up into to top level, cheered on by some older kids, and realised he couldn't get down. He was crying for his mum. Mum couldn't care less even though I had seen her with him before and knew it was his mum.
Taking grandchildren this afternoon so I will report back later 😅

Adult nights are tremendous fun (when you're not in the young DC years anyway, you couldn't pay me to go to one now), but they're very obviously a side line money spinner for the venue. The typical soft play Saturday afternoon session isn't designed with parents in mind.

Quite clearly not the same thing

I think most of the problems comes from kids in inappropriate areas- either older ones in the toddler section and parents nowhere in sight, or kids too young for the main climber either getting stuck and upset, or requiring a parent to hover behind them. Which sounds like what this was OP if a 2YO was causing havoc with mum nowhere to be seen?

Our local one is a specific under 3s area and then over 3s are allowed on the main climber. Mine are over 3 and they know not to go to the toddler area. This place is also massive and a complete maze so I can’t watch them because you just can’t see them most of the time, I can’t split myself in half and follow 2 kids in different directions and from embarrassing experience when my youngest ran off as a young toddler- at adult size you just can’t keep up with them through all the small people sized obstacles! And I think it’s good for them to have to opportunity for physical independent play.

So I sit at a table, yes sometimes have a coffee, but the point is not moving so they know where they can find me. We also spend lots of time in playgrounds where I can see them play and I drilled it into them from being toddlers that they wait their turn, don’t push etc. so I’m pretty sure they don’t turn into little horrors whilst in the privacy of the ball pond!

I think you need to watch the under 4s, over that they can just run around in the big bit. I wrote most of my masters dissertation in soft play or playgrounds while my kids had a fun time running about.

Yanbu the amount of parents who have left their baby with us while we supervise ours in the baby section is frightening. No way would I leave my baby with two strangers and just go off. We've often had to search the centre for a parent so that we could leave and once I had to alert staff to the fact that we were leaving and a small child barely able to walk was being left alone .