Parents not watching their children at soft play centres.

[Crystalbabe]

Will start with saying I know some people are against soft play for other reasons. This post isn’t about that.

Took my little boy to soft play yesterday. A mum walks in with 2 kids around say 2 and 4 years old. She sits in the sitting area near the soft play and lets them in alone. They are both causing havoc, throwing toys down the slides which hit another child and at one point the 2 year old was trying to go down the big slide head first to which the 4 year old was shouting out to their mum and in the end as I was near her 2 year old boy I had to grab him for her away from the slide as she was shouting “can somebody stop him!”

My DS is my first child and I’ve only taken him soft play about 5 times, but these situations where parents don’t watch their kids and they cause issues has happened twice now (the other time was a 4-5 year old keep shoving a toddler in the ball pit with no parent in site apart from me who told the older kid to stop)

YABU - Parents should be able to let their kids go into soft play unsupervised it’s just one of them things, it should be safe

YANBU - Parents should be watching their children and not expecting other parents to watch their kids (lol)

None if the soft play is largely empty.

I watch my kids from the sidelines.

If I'm honest, I can't stand those parents who follow their kids around inside the soft play unless there's a very specific reason.

I see soft play as helping kids to become more independent and learning to play together, I get there's some little gits who do need better supervision but overall, parents should supervise and watch from the outside, not crawling around inside.

Also, keep the big kids out of the baby section!

@Rfthyhuj

From "encouraged" in my post, to "forced" in your reply. Excellent reading comprehension.

Fling yourself about an empty soft play all you like hen, that's not what I take issue with.

Absolutely agree and think soft plays should make this a rule and enforce it. Sick of bloody big brute dads running about with less special awareness than the kids.

Yup. Used to work retail and had parents drop their young kids off in our store like we were a daycare centre. Inevitably when they returned a couple of hours later with shopping bags in hand, if you dared display an iota of judgement they'd give you a tirade of abuse.

We ended up just calling the police but it happened pretty much once per shift.

Nobody is paid enough to put up with a lot of parents, frankly. I wouldn't work in a soft play if it was a choice between that and being conscripted.

I have 3 young children - no I don't go into soft play and crawl about - I can't be in 3 places at once for one - you have 1 child so I can see why you might follow them around but most parents I know with more than 1 child don't do that

Yes I'm the same, but then like I said that's very much the norm here. Soft play is for the kids, not the adults.

I agree that dads doing this are the biggest issue in soft play.

I comprehended the patronising tone you adopted. Not sure why you thought anyone needed your words of wisdom of what you think children need when it comes to socialising.

How do you know they’re doing this if you’re not in the soft play yourself?

This.

But unfortunately most parents of the "little gits" are big gits themselves and will not admit their poor parenting has resulted in a badly behaved child. The parents that do acknowledge their children struggles, are usually keeping a closer eye on them.

Most children are fine supervised from a distance.

Older kids don't need supervising as a general rule. Mine are 9 and nearly 7, I don't watch them constantly because it's not necessary, possible and I would be bored stiff.

Small children shouldn't be in the older kids bit because there will be older ones charging about like loons which is exactly what soft play is designed for. It's best to supervise them just in case they hurt another child or end up somewhere they shouldn't because they are too young to be trusted (thinking toddler age here)

I sit down with a coffee and look at my phone whilst keeping an ear out and looking up from time to time to see what's going on. They wouldn't hurt another child on purpose and they know if there is a toddler in sight just to be careful around them but otherwise it's a free for all as it should be.

I don't generally go in with them these days unless it's necessary but if it was empty and I fancied burning off some energy I probably would occasionally but for me the whole point is to be left alone.

I think most of the responses feel the same as I do. Supervise your babies / younger toddlers. If they are 3/4 + no need to be in the soft play with them, but make sure you are keeping an eye on them. No one is saying you can’t enjoy a coffee break whilst your child is playing, but it’s not other parent’s responsibility to keep an eye on their wellbeing whilst you’re too busy on your phone.

Older kids / parents shouldn’t be running around and playing in the soft play designed for under 5’s

At 7 and 9 I agree you don’t need to watch them like a hawk. Any toddler shouldn’t be allowed in the “older” kids section. And as long as you know your 7 and 9 year old aren’t causing havoc in the under 3’s, let them get on with it.

@Rfthyhuj

How do you know they’re doing this if you’re not in the soft play yourself?

Do you think this is some kind of gotcha?

Don't know what soft plays look like round your way hen, but round here they're big netted things that you can see into. Hence no need to be bouldering about like a galumphing galoot.

If a child is so badly behaved they can't be trusted in the more hidden areas of a soft play without an adult shadowing them, they shouldn't be in a soft play at all.

@Rfthyhuj

I comprehended the patronising tone you adopted. Not sure why you thought anyone needed your words of wisdom of what you think children need when it comes to socialising.

Because this is a public forum. You can ignore my posts if you want, that's up to you.

It depends on the age of the child. I’ve never had a bad experience at soft play, my daughter was an only until she was a teen so I would take her to soft play and let her get on with it. I would watch her though - but it was more so to make sure she wasn’t lonely.

when she was under the age of 5 I would play with her in the younger section.

I think parents need to keep an eye on their kids. They shouldn’t leave under 5 year olds on their own there, with their backs turned whilst they have a coffee. I don’t think that’s right.

There are always parents that let their kids run riot and turn a blind eye because they arsed so YANBU.

I used to go to toddler group and most parents/grandparents kept an eye on them but there was always a few exceptions who would quite literally turn their back and let their kids run wild, pushing in, snatching, shoving etc etc…. It’s was infuriating and ruined it for the descendant carers.

I complete agree about the dads. I also love your use of the word ‘hen’, you’ve really cheered my afternoon up.

Mmm. So you see these dads bouldering at the nets?

Here, the soft plays are three or four storeys high and you cannot see far past the nets, and would have no way of knowing if a parent was getting in a child’s way.

You were replying to my post.

You can't usually see all of it, but you can usually see a fair chunk - certainly enough to see bouldering dads getting in the way in the parts you can see, whatever is going on in the rest.

Adults should stay out of all but the under fives soft play area. TBH it is a safeguarding issue as well.

@Rfthyhuj

You were replying to my post.

As a functioning adult you are still capable of ignoring if you so wish

Mmm. So you see these dads bouldering at the nets?

Mmm.... yes. Seeing as nets have big gaps in them and all that.

but if they have several children in there they should be in there too! I think it rather ruins the point of soft play of it's being structured and led by ab adult.
"Ok, let's all go on the slide. I know you want to go in the ball pit Jersea-Maie but we'll do that in 8 minutes. Right ok let's do five bounces each on the trampoline. No Pauleigh-Dai, that's 6. Go and sit over there and wait for the rest of us!!"

My kids play together but they'll go in opposite directions, at different speeds etc. they don't need me to be anything but on site and in sight if they want me