Anyone else hate sundays?

[tearsandtiaras]

I find Sundays so hard- lone parent work full time in very demanding job

Sunday is 8 hours plus of non stop chores, prep for the week. Everywhere ( parks, woods, shops, etc ) is filled with families /
Couples enjoying each others company.

I push on and crack on, try not to look and ignore the crippling loneliness. Try to look away and count blessings. I cry every sunday at least once. I am desperately lonely. There is zero capacity to see anyone with the list of relentless chores.

I know i should be grateful for what i have. Does anyone have any tips for the crippling loneliness?

You need to restructure your evenings. If you are batch prepping at the weekend why is your evening meal taking so long? Surely your 14 year old could pop something into the oven before you get home?

Your DD should be responsible for her own homework. You only need to check that she has done it - though I will be honest, I didn't check on any of my three when they were that age. I trusted them to do it, and it was on them if they didn't.

How much life admin takes half an hour every day five days a week?

Son or Dd?

Also the sky won't fall in if you don't do housework for a weekend.

I think there will be some ways you can rearrange what you are doing to make your life easier. Like online shopping.

can I ask why are you working at home in the evenings (are you a teacher?). I think it’s a separate conversation to be having with work, it’s not within your hours and if it’s happening all the time then that’s not on. It means all your work can’t be done within the hours they are paying you to do.

can you finish earlier on a Friday? Personally I don’t think you should have that much cleaning to do on a Sunday. Even 10 minutes every day of targeted cleaning/tidying can make a difference. The big things like bathroom/beds on a Sunday.
You are out a lot, your house shouldn’t be getting that dirty/messy.

Does DD cook or start to get dinner ready? Prep ingredients etc I think that might be a better use of time than ironing (and get non iron). I find DD wears a blazer and honestly you can just iron the front of a shirt.

I think also having a teenager on Sundays is very different to having a primary aged child. It’s hard to find something to do and you do tend to fall back on house stuff. No parties, softplay, parks, it can feel a bit empty in comparison.

No i haven't

Child protection social worker for a local authority. Front line social work arena involving court

Agree with@Ahhhmarsbar
It's ok your parent saying they don't want carers / only want you , it's hard work and if / when you become ill - who will take care of them?
We had a lovely lady pop in to mum every morning.
Chattered ti her etc - just lovely.
You can't pour from an empty cup.

@tearsandtiaras at 18.57 you said: I have no family, no partner and my son's father is not in the picture in any way.

Does it make any difference?

OP I am full of admiration for how you’re coping- I know I couldn’t do it! I just hope you can carve out a little niche just for yourself. Some things can be left- eg substitute a chore with watching your favouriteTV programme, or relaxing with a face pack. I hope your DC appreciates you.

Sorry i was thinking man for father - my mistake like i said i have a few conditions

@Runnerinthenight if she has a son as well and there are 2+, yes it changes the thread somewhat, especially if younger than the 14 noted.

@tearsandtiaras noted.

Okay so I understand. I’m guessing everyone’s case loads are bursting at the seams. Is everyone working like this? Are your days all out of the office? Even half a day at home once a fortnight sounds like it could make a difference.

However, if you feel like this, you could end up burning out and that helps no one.
I think it might be worth having a word with your manager regardless. It’s their job to come out with solutions to manage this.

Can you side step into another team/are of SW. it’s just DC will be going into GCSEs and May need more support.

Can you get the cleaner to come once a week, do online shopping (10 mins max), no ironing (non iron shirts), cook easy meals / batch cook/ get your child to dinner once a week, stop supervising homework, lower standards around the house, get your child to have lunch at school?

I hate Sundays, it means I have to teach in school on Monday. And lo and behold unlike the rest of the civilized world we are in school until Tuesday week. I actually can’t believe it when all my friends working around Europe have been phoning asking how my summer holidays are going. 🤬🤬🤬🤬

I’m guessing these people saying ‘14yo…really?’ don’t have chatty teenage daughters.

Mine’s nearly 20…she’s been home from her first year at uni for 6 weeks and it’s lovely having her around but I’m ‘on’ all day at work, then come home and have to be ‘on’ for her as she wants/needs to chat (she’s had some stuff going on over the last few weeks).

So on top of the practical stuff and general mental load there’s the mental/emotional depletion of that, plus the difference in what we prioritise housework wise and never been able to leave the house and know what I’m coming back to (it’s often my mess tbf but at least I know and I’m expecting it!)

Fortunately I’m a raging introvert and have lots of online friendships so I don’t struggle with loneliness but I totally get the overwhelm and relentless of it all.

I can't relate to the parenting side but I do understand the Sunday blues. You work through the week, Friday arrives and you're excited to finally be able to live your life, then the weekend whizzes by and then Monday hits again. It's a neverending trudge. And for what? All you can do is hope you catch a break and get respite, no matter how brief, and forget about the world.

I had my mum quizzing me about why I couldn’t visit her this week because I have stuff on in the evenings…I’m working a full week plus evenings…

I bloody love my job but this feels like the longest half term in the history of education right now
(and I’ll still be working evenings and weekends in the holidays…FMAL)

This is very accurate. Tbh i found parenting her when she was younger and i had a couple of hours to myself in the evening when she slept

Eh?

I have got a cleaner once every 2 weeks for 3 hours. She is a god send - i would do more if I could afford it but i am quite poor and really i shouldn't pay the 3 hours i do

Shop on a weeknight after work (I do this)
14 year old can make her own lunches
Do not iron at all
Split the cleaning over other days
Stop feeling sorry for yourself and find a class or something on Sunday
A 14 year old doesn't need parented.