Anyone else hate sundays?

[tearsandtiaras]

I find Sundays so hard- lone parent work full time in very demanding job

Sunday is 8 hours plus of non stop chores, prep for the week. Everywhere ( parks, woods, shops, etc ) is filled with families /
Couples enjoying each others company.

I push on and crack on, try not to look and ignore the crippling loneliness. Try to look away and count blessings. I cry every sunday at least once. I am desperately lonely. There is zero capacity to see anyone with the list of relentless chores.

I know i should be grateful for what i have. Does anyone have any tips for the crippling loneliness?

Cooking, - get a new roasting tray and start doing tray bakes
cleaning - choose one chore each evening over the week and do less in one go
Lunch preps - 14 yo should be helping you with this. Choose easy lunches like wraps
Ironing - Only iron the few things that actually need ironing.
Dinner Preps - see above tray bakes
Food shop - write a list on Monday, online shop on Tuesday and delivery on Sunday

Please don’t get the Sunday blues.

I think Sunday hammers home the grief of being walked out on by family and DH. Every
Other day seems to be ok, successful. Theres something about Sunday, the same as Christmas day etc the days that are family days, how alone You are a lone parent. Its hammered home further by the chores and burden of planning/ prepping the week. Arguing with a teenager to complete chores homework etc

I wish I could sleep through it all.

Huge empathy, I hated Sundays as a single parent, the loneliness was crushing .

Your child is 14 they should be helping you out around the house. Get them doing reasonable tasks like washing up, general tidying etc.

do your food shop online and have it delivered at a time convenient for you and try and batch cook if you can. Things like bolognese that can then be eaten with pasta, in a lasagne, jacket potato or chilli than can be eaten with rice, wraps, jacket potato etc. This can save you a night or two of cooking a week. Also allow yourself an “easy” dinner a week too. A pizza you can throw In the oven, beans on toast etc.

I personally prefer using my Sundays to get everything done ready for the week ahead. It makes me feel organised and like I’m making my following week easier however if this doesn’t work for you, change it up.

sort yourself a weekly schedule for cleaning and housework so you’re not doing it all on one day. Bathrooms on a Monday, hoovering/cleaning floors Tuesday, changing beds Wednesday etc.

try and make the space for something with your daughter once a week to bond. Even if it’s going for a drive thru Starbucks after school, the cinema for a film you’d both enjoy or a walk somewhere nice outside.

and more importantly find time for yourself. Your daughter is only going to get more independent and wanting to spend time away from you. Join a club that interest you. Get into a hobbie. Anything from running, dancing, reading.

Please read the whole thread

Thank you this is really comforting to know there are some people who get it

Give up ironing
Get your food shop delivered

And I understand when you're feeling lonely, it seems like absolutely everyone else you see is coupled up or in a happy family, but that's because you're focusing on them.

Weekends are actually difficult for many people. I found weekends the most difficult when I was single, in my twenties and living alone.

You are not alone in how you feel. As your children get older, the drudgery and chores will lessen a little

Don’t want to victim blame here, it’s hard, and you have it the hardest, but ironing…..I’m pretty sure that shit is against the law now a days, drop that job like a hot potato.

Your Sunday sounds tough alright!

I’d really look into what this 8 hours of non stop prep is and see what can be changed. Can you get the cleaner on a more regular basis for shorter periods, e.g. an hour every week? Are you cooking complicated meals, could you do some easier prep for lunches and dinners? One large pan of lasagna and one curry could do multiple dinners when you add naan, garlic bread, salad, etc on the side.

Personally I’d want to get 2 or 3 household jobs done throughout the week so that it’s not all built up on the weekend. Just as an example - Can DD dust and hoover once a week after school, and you do the bathrooms for 30 mins on a Wednesday?

Hi OP, your description of Sundays sums up how I felt when my child was little. I believe our experiences are more common than you think. there is something about Sundays that emphasises what you are missing. I raised my child as a single parent and my parents were dead. Everywhere seemed to be full of families/women and men with children and grandparents. It reinforced what I felt was missing and perhaps others were taking for granted.
Even my closest friends weren't aware of how I was feeling and long BH weekends were worse. I also worked FT too and can appreciate all the chores that need to be done. It's important that you go out and take a walk in the park for some fresh air. Don't get too bogged down with housework, it will always be there. Try to focus on each section of the day, nobody knows what the future holds and my experience also supports that having a partner can bring a different set of challenges. Some of my friends have since told me that they used to envy me being on my own.
I remember putting on some of my favourite music and embracing it.
I am not underestimating the feelings of loneliness. Your son is growing up and will be doing more things on his own.
Take care, you are doing an amazing job raising your son and working FT. All the responsibilities are on you. Look after yourself

Sundays are just prep for the rest of the week imo

I completely empathise with the lonely aspect, and busy job aspect, but I do wonder how much of this you're doing inefficiently. Parenting until bedtime? 14 year old? I'm on my own with a 14 year old and 11 year old at the moment and they chip in, eldest does the dishwasher, helps clear up after dinner, can iron his own uniform and packed lunch, he often does dinner once a week. Your DD can definitely be stepping up a bit more. Get the food shop delivered and do it on a different night.

I thought the poster gave you good advice.

Things aren't working for you, but you are the only one that can change that. I stopped ironing my kids' uniforms, and they were fine. You can buy non-iron blouses/shirts. I don't often buy clothes that need ironing. I have a steamer for something like linen, which is the only concession I will make because I like linen shorts/trousers in summer.

Can't you split the chores between Saturday and Sunday? Take your DC out somewhere for at least part of the day? A 14 year old could and should be helping with chores. As you have a cleaner, you should easily be able to cut this down.

I don't get home until 7 then cook/ dinner / eat until 8pm. 8-8.30 i help dd with homework. Or i pick her up from a club then we eat later. At 8.30 i have a shower and prep lunch for the next day. Clean the kitchen. 9.15pm DD and i both go to bed,

I get up at 5.30 am to do email house school / clubs admin. 6am we both get up and both out the door at 7am.

3 nights a week i work later in the evening after she goes to bed.

Fair point r.e weekly delivered shop i could cut this corner.

I cannot go to bed later as i have 3 medical conditions. I cannot get up any earlier.

Saturday i take her to a club and cook, clean and we go the gym together

@tearsandtiaras homework really? I don't even help my 11 year old except to check it's being done and a spelling test! By 14 they really should be doing homework independently.

Anyway there are 2 issues here; how you're managing your time, you can get lots of practical advice for that, and then the other is being lonely, I suspect the latter you just want some comfort and recognition from and not advice. It's easier to give advice so you might be feeling like you're getting a bit of a pile on and people missing the point. I'm a certain your Sundays could be better from a practical point of view, and I'm sure, if you're that unhappy it may be you need to evaluate things more broadly in terms of your work, but I appreciate that's not easy to do as a single parent when it's all on you.

I hear you op. I'm sure it's the family family everywhere that gets to you and that's completely valid. Hugs.

Yes i spend 30 mins with her in her room it can be homework/ chat/ reading/
Music practice listening to or art i think thats healthy

Yes i spend 30 mins with her in her room it can be homework/ chat/ reading/Music practice listening to or art i think thats healthy

Well yes that's different to making it sound like you're helping her with homework every night. Anyway I think the rest of my post was helpful but feel free to just get defensive.

long commutes, high standards at home, doing it on your own and with
a teenage son is bound to be tiring and lonely, Sunday a maintenance
day -
your son will want to be out with his friends? its grim, many of us will know

I can't relate to this at all. Sundays are the best. I don't think I've actively "parented" since my 16 year old went to secondary school. He gets his own food, does his own laundry and his share of the housework, bins, hoovering, walking the dog etc.

On a Sunday we relax. Any homework is done on a Friday night and he has a hobby on Saturday that he takes himself to and from on the train. I haven't ever got involved with homework in secondary school. It's supposed to be independent.

Today I've read, done a bit of gardening, watched a TV show and relaxed. The teen has gamed, washed and dried his school uniform, made us lunch and is now talking to his mates, where he'll probably remain until bed.

I don't understand the "chaos" that you're describing, from parenting one teenager. It sounds like you're being a martyr. Just... Don't do it.

Wait do you have a son or a daughter, they seem to have changed sex mid thread?

Sunday is my favourite day, time with the kids.

I get all my jobs done Saturday and then Sundays free.
Lay in
Lovely leisurely breakfast
Long shower
Walk
Gardening
Sunday lunch - usually gone 7 pm
Then relaxing on my bed (sat up with comfy pillow) watching Tv.
(Football actually ) got to follow the discussion at work tomorrow .