Wedding abroad night before meal

[spanieleyes22]

So I'm going to friends wedding in franc in august. Staying in a chateau for 3 nights. So the night before the wedding she has arranged a restaurant. It was 40 pp just me and ds going but now it's changed and it's 56 pp but it's a menu ds prob won't like eg foie gras and duck and different things. I feel it's a lot of money 132 altogether and ds will probably only pick at it. I'm not sure how to get out of it though. I was going to arrive in the evening and say we already ate. Is that rude. Then I'm wondering will she want to change the time of the meal to suit us. She needs to know if ds and me are coming to the meal. Wwyd. There's another meal on Sunday night which is 25 pp. not sure whether to stay for that or go back to the city . Will we be tired of socializing by then and prefer to do some sightseeing before flight home on Monday.

Sorry I'm assuming the whole wedding party is invited to the meal. Or anyone who has arrived.

Just be honest - say you won't do the first meal because your DS won't fancy it.

Be honest. Say it's too expensive and your son won't eat it.

It’s a one off and part of the wedding celebrations. Unless you absolutely can’t afford it, I’d suck it up and go. Your ds will pick and bits and there’ll be bread there. Get snacks for him later if he’s hungry. He might surprise you and enjoy the food anyway 😊

Foie gras is cruel, so I don't blame your ds for not wanting it. As meals out go, you would probably pay €132 for a Prezzo anyway, so go but prebook vegetarian for your son.

€132 for Prezzo??

I think you should decline. If DS is a child say you’ll leave it to the grown ups.

Just say no as your DS will be tired from journey and it’s not the type of food he likes

I would decline the meal and leave the final evening to go sightseeing, blame it on DS.
I think the meal sounds pricey if you and DS won't enjoy it and agree that three nights in company sounds like a lot.

Are all the other meals included with the price of the chateau?

There's going to be fruit in the rooms on sat morn and then the wedding dinner is at 8pm. On Sunday there is brunch provided.

If a couple decide to have their nuptials in France and invite guests to a pre-wedding meal then I’d expect them to foot the bill! Sorry. And NO do not expect your child…or any other human being …to eat foil gras. It’s cruelty in the extreme.

@Gall10 I agree.

This OP.
You've already forked out for flights (and accomodation possibly?) the only thing you absolutely need to attend is the wedding itself. If your friend throws a strop about you declining anything optional she's a twat

If she’s asked, she won’t mind if you say no. Just say he’ll be tired and you’ll have already eaten.

Is the wedding reception not enough mingling with others FGS? I'd go a bit mad and would decline with the "tired after travelling" reason. Sorry to say it, but no one will either miss you or mind, they can enjoy their own company. Will you be able to get you and DS something to eat elsewhere though, because if you are stuck in Le Chateau it might cost the same to eat there as at Maison Foie Gras anyway.

With a DS in tow (not sure what age), I'm a bit alarmed at the fact that there is only fruit available until the reception meal at 8pm though! Having said that maybe breakfast is also provided by Le Chateau!

You will be making the effort to get there and join in the wedding itself, and presumably the brunch on the day after. That would be more than enough socialising for me, but I am not a wedding lover. Maybe that explains it for me.

Hey, thanks for the invite! The food on the first night is really not my cup of tea and I'll be heading off before the Sunday meal but thank you so much for thinking of us. Let's get a takeaway when you're back from your honeymoon and have your photos back 😁 xx

Presumably you’re paying for yours and your DS’s travel and accommodation to attend your friend’s wedding. I don’t think you’re obliged to participate in all these expensive meals as well, particularly as that sort of food is not what you usually eat especially your DS.

It’s a bit mean (vulgar and money-grubbing really) for your friend to expect you to stump up costs of travel and staying in a chateau but that she isn’t hosting you all to at least one of the meals beforehand. Sounds like aspiration without the means to achieve it, frankly.

If the chateau is like most I’ve stayed in there’s a village nearby and a decent cafe where they’ll do you a nice simple meal your DS will like. Go for a walk to the village and suit yourself rather than pay a huge amount on gussied up food - I mean, the menu you describe is lovely, but not all the time or for a young boy!

an alternative view is that it’s a chance to get to know people before the wedding. I’d go unless you really can’t afford it and your son can eat what he can.

How old is DS? Why are you so sure he won't like the food? Why aren't you even considering the possibility tjat he might try it and like it?

Check what other option to eat there is. Will you have your own car or is village in walking distance? If you have to get a taxi somewhere remote it might cost the same!

Yeh think I will bring some snacks in the suitcase for ds ! He's 16 but is a fussy eater. He will come to the meal but it seems like a lot of money after the flights and accommodation and transfers etc etc . I won't have a car so am hoping we can get an Uber or similar to the local village.

It’s fine to say you’re not going to the meal the day before.

Shall I try and arrive late. I think it will be embarrassing if we are there and they all
Head to meal

Agree, it’s fine to say you’ll do something casual with your son.

No it’s fine, say your little one is tired and you’re sorting yourself out and are so looking forward to the next day.