to ask if you've achieved the nirvana of not wanting to buy stuff you REALLY don't want

[ClownsFear]

I have really want to buy all of the jellycat fruit and vegetables (these kind of things

https://www.gracegentle.co.uk/collections/jellycat-fruit-vegetables )

and display them in a massive basket. I really want them.

I don't need them and I don't really truly want them. If I bought them I'd waste a huge amount of money. I'd be happy for about a week and then I would just become stressed out by the amount of dust they are collecting.

I frequently feel like this about stuff - not just stuffed toys, but random stationery, ornaments, strange furniture and often stuff posted randomly on MN. For example I saw recently a table shaped like a burger not this but a bit like this:

www.amazon.com/TAUODUYY-Decorative-Modelling-Material-Changing/dp/B0CL2CQTNS

I really wanted to buy it but same thing - know I don't really want it and it would just end up annoying.

I would have hoped by now I'd have grown out of this desire for junk stuff. I think it must be peak adult to not have this.

I suppose I'm better as I tend to resist but I want to rid myself of the urge to buy utter crapulous stuff I don't need.

How do you attain this state?

I've never wanted much 'stuff' really. I buy clothes when I have to. I buy books on my kindle. Occasionally a nice bubble bath or facecream. That's about it! Don't like jewellery, ornaments, clutter or candles/diffusers/incense burners ... my sister loves all that stuff!😂 people tell me I'm very difficult to buy presents for 😏

I don’t think this is something you grow out of, exactly. I’ve never wanted a basket of JellyCat fruit and veg. But I grew up with hoarders.

I want space on my shelves to show possibility. I want to see my floors and my walls and the tops of my tables. I want to be able to open a drawer or a cupboard and be able to put something away without shoving stuff I haven’t touched in 8 years to the side.

Jellycat have a new cuddly disco ball

I really really want.it

What exactly does the Jellycat stuff do? I don't get the love.

I just think:
-Why do I want to BUY this?
-What does this bring to my life?
-Is it just clutter that will take up space & offer nothing past the rush of purchasing?'

It's always pretty clear then if it's something that I will use or just become landfill. I hate clutter anyway. DH has stopped picking on my clutter free obsession after cleaning our his DF's house earlier this year when he moved. The crap his DF & (now passed) DM had was mind boggling.

They are ornaments really, I don't think they are supposed to do much other that elicit sighs of "oh how cute'

@JudgeJ Exactly. Who has the spare cash to even consider this??

My "cure" was my friends no fault eviction. I looked around at my own rented house and realised if we had to move it would take weeks to pack up our stuff because it was full of stuff that I had really liked when I bought it but was, in reality, totally pointless. Now I'm ruthless.

I have a friend who removes an item from her house every time she buys a new one to bring in. I wish I could do this

I have to buy all the things, it’s only when I have to move them for building works or decorating that I really regret it

Always been pretty frugal but then I began to see the cost of whatever it was compared to a weeks groceries or a tank of petrol, something I have to buy which seems like too much money every time. It puts the cost into perspective. Spending is a habit to break.

Let me help you: that basket of cuddly fruit and veg is absolutely horrific and doesn’t belong in any home. Likewise the burger table which attains the heights (or depths?) of vulgarity. Honestly, how could you even entertain the thought of purchasing these items for all to see?

I’ve always been an avid shopper and I still buy almost all the books and clothes I want - and no regrets, but I cured myself of buying craft supplies, collectable dolls and shoes (I pretty much only wear one pair of walking boots and have for years) when I overdid the shopping during the pandemic and ended up just selling most of it still new on ebay for a massive loss. I realised I’d been buying stuff I didn’t want or need for years and can stop myself now.

I saw a few videos about playing the recorder on youtube and my first instinct was to order a recorder and some instruction books, but I stopped myself as I have no interest in playing music, never have.

Something I couldn’t have done three years ago.

Thanks, I have had counselling before, but not for the hoarding.

My GP has also kicked off the process for ADHD / ND diagnosis.

Between moving around a lot in my 20's, and working for the big banks during the housing crash seeing people being evicted and all of their random stuff, to having to clean houses of deceased relatives - the thought of collecting a bunch of crap is massively unappealing.

£72 for a Large Avocado?!! No thanks 🤣

I have recently had a provisional diagnosis of ADHD and go through phases of buying stuff I don't really need, often tops/blouses and pointless household gadgets that I am very unlikely to use. My counsellor suggested I run every unnecessary purchase past my adult DD. So far it's working really well!

Yes to all of this, and the bit about the books too.

I haven't had to clear a house yet, but I know the house I'll have to clear one day, and the prospect is daunting.

I'm saving to hopefully move house soon, I've never saved in my life until the last 5 years. Due to ds leaving school I have lost CB, tax credits & his DLA, I'm doing more with much less money & don't buy anything unless it is essential.

I love the cuddly croissant!

The burger table is absolutely disgusting. 🤢 The Jelly cats are cute but one is enough.
I get tempted mainly by clothes and make up. I now buy clothes I'll definitely wear, but I'm still not buying day to day stuff like jeans, tshirts so I do need to change, I just don't get excited by daily things. This past year I've been very skint so most of my purchases have been things I've loved at full price then been reduced. So instead of £50, I've got them for about £20. My most recent purchase is 2 bras, BOGOF. £25 for both. An essential and a good price. Once again I liked them at full price but didn't purchase. I've also learnt to buy better. No polyester (unless it's a REAL bargain and otherwise good quality) no colours that don't suit me, if I've bought it and haven't been tempted to wear it before the return date I'll return it. When I'm tempted by new make up I'll go through what I have and tell myself I have that colour already etc.

What I really want is a Care Bear. I had one as a child. I'd love one for my birthday. Otherwise I'm not overly tempted by such things.

There is a collectors market for Jellycat stuff. Just saying.

These make me smile though.

But yes they are just crap. Or are they

That's true. Once you're fed up of the you can sale them on. Sometimes making a profit. The burger table not so much. 😆

Remember Beanie Babies? I got like this with them. I don't even like toys, I just got swept along by the hype. There was a shop next to my office, which had all the limited edition ones; I genuinely felt like I HAD to have them. Still can't understand it.

I ended up selling them all for practically nothing on Ebay. Last year, I needed some decent handbags - maybe two. I've now got eight in different colours.

Ironically, I'm also doing my 'death cleaning' so am chucking out more than I'm bringing in ... except ... I decided my new hobby is making gemstone jewellery. Nice, huh? Well, yes, but it turns out my real hobby is buying bloody gemstones! At least they don't take up much space.

Just Say No, OP! As for me, no more "must get that while it's in stock" until I've used over half of my gem collection (2030 at the earliest, the way I'm going 😬)