To Feel Angered by People Taking So Many Photos for the 'Gram...?

[LilacCatt]

I am feeling so nostalgic right now for life pre-social media and pre-smart phones.

I am mid 30s. When I was 17 I had MySpace. When I was 19 I had Facebook. I deleted social media when I was 21 and have been without ever since. I use WhatsApp and occasionally have a peruse of Mumsnet.

Anyway.

Lately (for the past few years), I feel like whenever I visit a remotely interesting place (days out are my favourite thing to do) I am just so distracted from my own enjoyment by people around me posing for photos. Sometimes I see people doing really cringey things such as taking a few steps forward whilst getting their photo taken as if "candid", then quickly checking the result, and then going back to their original spot to take the same few steps forward whilst posing again.

Oh my god. This is all with people around them who are trying to enjoy the moment of the place of interest.

I feel it really repulses me, and actually angers me.

But I can't articulate WHY that is.

I don't want to be a bitter or angry person.

So I just want to explore this emotion a bit more, and open up the floor for a debate here.

Am I being unreasonable to have the inner emotional reaction when I see this sort of thing going on around me?

Should I live and let live?

Is it a symbol of everything wrong in society???

Questioning myself and my thoughts.

Thanks.

I was at a famous landmark recently. There was a low wall in front of the landmark. No one could get a photo of them at the landmark because a girl kept insisting on walking across the wall towards her boyfriend (towards the middle/end of the wall) and swooshing her hair as she walked past him.

The moment she walked past the camera she would immediately stop, swipe the camera from him, watch the footage and scream “It’s not right!!”

Then she would repeat it; walk, swoosh hair, watch video, scream at boyfriend. It was quite hypnotic but deeply weird.

However I am in two minds about this feeling weird to me as in my opening paragraph I wrote:

”No one could get a photo of them and the landmark because...”

and I originally wanted to write:

“. No one could get a normal photo of them and the landmark because…”

A normal photo of someone at a landmark to 40 ish year old me is very different concept than this girl. Just like my idea of having my photo taken was different from my great grandparents. I just want to smile and get a snapshot. She wants more. My grandparents didn’t smile.

However I do hate how vain everyone is. When I grew up the worst thing you could be was a poser and I detest that posers are the norm now.

And there’s always been a particularly high concentration of arseholes at tourist/ visitor attractions. This is just the latest strain

It's absolutely dire, I totally agree with you op.
In my town there is a particularly insta-famous street of houses and, honestly, there are hundreds of people there every day all taking the same damn photo.

You might think it's harmless but I worry for global warming - storing all this pointless data causes a massive carbon footprint.

I also worry for our brains and our memories - we don't need to remember anything anymore because we have 73936 photos of the event.

It terrifies me how unbothered so many people are actually.

Yes you're right... The mainstream vulture has changed.

So, do you think it will change again?

Do you think we will look back on these times and find it crazy that people used to spend an entire duration of a gig with their arms up, filming?

Do you think AI might change photo-taking habits? Why take a real photo, when you can just generate one.....? Especially since there is clearly no genuine interest in visiting these places, but only in having the photo (in the case of Instagram tourism). So why even bother going if AI can pretend you have?

Someone upthread uses the word vapid, and another said everyone thinks they are a celebrity- I agree with both.

I went to the British Museum and a young couple were taking photos outside the main entrance. Except it was the man taking endless snaps of the woman, who was posing up a storm with her top pulled off one shoulder. What for?! I may have muttered something when she turned her back to the camera and looked over her shoulder. Vacuous twats.

I also hate those fake flower arches that restaurants now have outside their doors for the Gram. I avoid those restaurants. Or people taking photographs of their mundane meals. Cheese and ham toastie with skin on fries - snap snap.

I would never go to a flower arch restaurant either 🤣

My husband won't stop for people taking photos now. He just carries on walking through.

Yes, I know I don’t, but maybe if you saw me taking pictures you’d think I was. And I’m jealous your shithole town has been done up, mine hasn’t and I honestly feel embarrassed seeing tourists here because it looks so dated and shite!

What really gets under your skin, what really gets your goat, what really really makes you mad when you know actually isn't a big deal, is usually something about you.

Is there some part of yourself that you push down, don't acknowledge, reject, that you see in these other people? Is there something that you need to let out or accept about yourself?

It's clearly late! Good luck!

Wow, I didn't even THINK about servers and carbon footprint. Woah.

The thing that also gets me is...

..and this is about non-selfie Instagram tourism...

If I visit somewhere, I generally wouldn't take a photo that would likely be on the internet already. I'd experience being there... And then when telling my friends/family about it, I'd Google image search it 🤷‍♀️

If you're in any way academically inclined read Marshal McLuhan & Jodie Dean.
I don't like insta tourism either. It's because of the values that this kind of communication embodies - about how things look to others to the detriment of all else

Well, yes, you have a point!! This is what's making me think...

But I dunno what it is????

Thank you! I am just popping out briefly to hit my 10,000 steps. Then I'm coming home, getting in bed, and will take a look. Do you happen to have a link? ☺️

Fucking hate flower arches.
Another thing I hate now are those naff photo booths you get at weddings and office parties - the ones with comedy moustaches on sticks etc for those who want to take humorous snaps with a crazeeee vibe.

No thanks Sandra from accounts - I don't want to pose with a giant inflatable microphone while you do that annoying kissing face wearing a tache. While Bernard the manager holds a sign saying hashtag live laugh love 🙄. So you that can cycle it round everyone's Instagram stories all weekend.

Ha yes the insult “poser” my dad used to say it not heard it for years I guess because being a poser is basically normalised now.

I completely get the rage. We were in the gym on holiday and a girl was fannying on in flip flops, making it seem like a full work out and posing with her arms up in a strong pose. She had done a single squat and her boyfriend filmed it in slow mo. I was incensed. But why? I couldn’t tell you. Absolutely nothing to do with me, or my workout. Had no bearing on my day or life whatsoever but it really irritated me. Is it just the fakeness of it all?

don’t get me started on dragging poor kids to the freezing cold pumpkin patch for the gram.

We were at a national trust place a few weeks ago and people were blocking a grand staircase so they could lounge on the steps and pose (and check the pic, and pose again...) and sitting on the walls overlooking the grounds looking wistfully away from the camera and flicking their hair about. It's more about "how good can I look in this place" than enjoying where you are. I agree OP, nothing wrong with a few pics yo remember a day out, but posing like you're in a photoshoot for vogue is a bit much.

Thing is, your outrage is futile- it doesn't change anything and only results in you getting internally furious. There are some causes or issues that we can fight or do something proactive- campaign, sign a petition, donate, volunteer etc but I just don't think there's anything productive to channel your fury into.

You can debate it in on forums like these, talk about it in real life, not have any social media yourself... but besides that I just don't think there's much you can do.

So for your own wellbeing it's probably better to accept people choose to live differently to you and live and let live. You won't change anyone's mind by telling them they should do things differently.

I hear you op

It's depressing x

I have found as I get older that I just really don't give a shite what other people are doing. If they want to spend their time taking pictures for instagram, let them get on with it. I don't understand why it would bother you so much. Get on with your own life and don't worry about what other people are doing.

@Babbahabba there is joy to be had in a pointless rant into the void, though. Especially when it goes completely unphotographed.

I don't think it's ok to just sit by and mindlessly accept that everyone is a phone zombie now. I like to protest these things, however futile.

YANBU

I could have written this.

it makes me just feel like I can’t be bothered to even go to certain types of events and it will just depress/annoy me

It's depressing that none of these people can actually enjoy anything simple like sitting in nature and observing everything happening around them.

Get over yourself and just let people be

Well, how would you have been treated in your family - by parents/siblings - if you had behaved like that?

Did you get get told you were a show-off, or shallow, or anything along those lines?

How would you have been treated if you were into beauty or fashion or selfies when young? Would that have been scorned?

I wonder if part of you wishes you had the freedom to do some of what they do, not to care they look like idiots, or self obsessed, or whatever.