To judge this mother?? (mother said loosely)

[SparklyGothKat]

I was at the shops after picking up the kids from school. I had Callum in his pushchair and the kids were standing beside, when I heard this woman shouting. She was shouting at her DS (she had two) and then she shouted 'I am going to smack you in the mouth if you don't shut up!!!!' In front of everyone in the shop. After I left, I could hear this boy crying and saying he wanted his daddy, she just kept screaming at him like a fishwife!! Why do some people have kids?

Yes, I'm sure some of them do. But I'm equally certain some don't give a flying fuck, and I reserve the right to judge them, and pity their children.

It's surely better not to think of it in a judgey way..I mean it would be great if they are all just stressed or whatever and its a one off/bad patch - and we can all relate to that!...as that means the kids aren't suffering that all the time..surely that's the important thing?..

Georgie...ffs lay off.

EVERYONE has BAD DAYS. you're one of the lucky ones (or robotic) if you never lose your temper or get het up... Congratulations.

yeah fine, whatever, pity their children, I guess you're right some of us just don't deserve to have kids do we.

I'm pretty sure their children don't need the pity of such a judgemental woman..... I could be wrong though... after all, I'm not perfect.

I would love to think that every anecdote on this thread relates to a one off isolated incident but that's pretty unlikely isn't it?

yeah, you're probably right, because those mums, like me, who are crap enough to have said such abhorent things to their children on more than one occasion never go home and cry for hours about what bitches and crap mums they are, because we don't give a fuck do we??

You're pretty bloody angry aren't you FAQ and WallofSilence? Am I the only person on this thread who has found it distressing to see a child being verbally attacked by their parent? Does that make me judgmental?I don't think so.

I once heard "If you run off like that again, the bad man will get you and I'll not come for you" in a shop, me and the girl on the til were like , but she may have been having a bad day.

and where exactly did either of us say that we didn't find it distressing????

ambi, you didnt watch cotton wool kids last night on channel 4 did you? that programme terrified me, and ivowed to 'let go' of the reins a bit more with my dd's.

I'm not angry.

I just hate mothers judging other mothers.

In the example you used the mother was explaining to the child why he can't have everything he asks for..you say he was 3... what's the right age to explain why he can't have everything then? In your opinion of course....?

So what is your point? What exactly is winding you up so much? I find it upsetting, you find it upsetting. We agree.

because obviously you've never been such a shit mother as I am and said any of those horrible things/spoken to their child/ren like that.

you think that we don't give a shit and don't regret any of it...

She wasn't explaining anything, she sounded like a cold, heartless bitch. If I was being charitable, I'd say she was unwell. You weren't there, you didn't hear her.

FAQ - the fact you care means you are NOT a shit mother..my mother said these things to me and a lot worse..and never ever thought she was in the wrong..that was pretty bad..you are clearly a good mother..be kind to yourself..sorry if I ever appeared judgy, you have made me see things from the other side

Oh sod this, I'm going to bed. I don't see a conflict here, you obviously do.

yes well georgie - I probably sound like a cold heartless bitch (that I am) too, doesn't mean that we regret every word/the tone it was said in afterwards.

oh so you can make snide comments about me "quoting", but then just can't see a conflict and fuck off to bed?

OK Georgie, you were there, that obviously makes you know all there is to know on the subject.

I think i'll leave this thread now, I can see you will never think less judgementally of others & maybe next time you see someone being spoken to by a cold hearted bitch of a mother you will phone ss.... really teach her a lesson eh?

ok Georgie let me try and spell it out for you.

You: Think that anyone speaking to their child like that is a cold, heartless bitch and totally wrong, and never regrets any of it afterwards. And you'd never do it to your children. Anyone that does speak to their child like that doesn't deserve to have children.

I: (Also) Think that speaking to a child like that is absolutely disgusting, and hate myself even more when I've done it. I also think you're probably right, I don't deserve to have my children.

I actually think it is important that we do judge and act on those judgements.

Most of the mothers judged on this thread probably need help.

I don't think anyone observing these parents as a one off should just assume that these are one off occurences - that would be for professional services to assess. To do nothing though, may very well consign these children to a life of misery. I can't see how any parent would want a child brought up in these kind of circumstances.

FAQ you do deserve your kids, im the same with DD, i say some ridiculous things when im out with her like "if you dont shut up ill take you home to bed" etc and i feel so bad about it but the more people look at me when im ranting on...the more wound up i become

wohh!! I can't believe it desended into an arguement.