AIBU to have nicknames for my neighbours?

[MedicalCannabis]

I saw a very funny thread on Twitter about this. I can't remember any of my neighbours' actual names, except one whose is amusing...

Please join me in sharing your unique neighbour nicknames!

We have:
The underwear model
Guy who owns the place
The fat family 🙈
Build-a-cunt 😬

I think sharing more would be too risky!

YABU - You should learn their names and stop being rude about them.
YANBU - Keep nurturing your creativity and being a massive curtain twitcher.

I dread to think! 😂

*The Clampets - the hoarding has spilled into the two broken down cars parked in their garden.

Cunt 1 and Cunt 2 - both motorcycle hobbyists.
Cunt 2 is also one if the Clampets.

The Accidents - short for 'The Accidents Waiting to Happen' 😭 Two bed house directly opposite. Nice old lady moves in a couple of years ago. Quickly followed by her (great?) grandson and his 3 broken down cars, then his stupid massive dog, then his girlfriend. Now she's pregnant, and they've just got a puppy...
Watch this space!

Love this thread....

We have:

The Stoners
The Welsh lady
Rocky (Hes about 7 stone dripping wet but hung a punch bag in the front garden off a tree during lockdown to keep fit)
Sonia the Jehovah

Flammable Gary 😂😂😂

Live this thread

We have:-

Baldy Bloke - no explanation needed
Matey Boy - always parks in the road when there’s plenty of room on his sodding driveway
Fat Steve - no explanation needed
Rusty Cunt - entitled 30 something guy who lives behind us and thinks he can do whatever he wants

We've had new neighbours on both sides in the last year and are not sure of/can't remember the names of any of them, so we just call them new Mrs Smith and new John and Sheila (the old neighbours' names).

We also have 'cunts two doors down' and 'Wolves prick over the road'. Not very imaginative but we know who we mean.

The Weirdo
Shaky
The Hermit
The Arseholes
Smokey
Moobs
The Alkies
Grumpy
That Young Lad
That Old Guy
Crazy Cat Lady

I could be a few of these 🫢

Prince Harry and Plandemic are our two most despised neighbours. We also have Iggy, Biggy and Piggy who are a family and The Renters - self explanatory and they change regularly.

I know the names of my next door neighbours but the rest of either the house number or a nickname. I did have ‘news of the world’ across the street (little old lady) who had to know everything about everyone. She even quizzed my parents on the contents of the black sacks they took from my house! (Garden rubbish for the curious)

Now it’s mostly ‘the one with the dog’, the ‘one with the baby’ and ‘the one with the overgrown garden’

We lived next to a family whose surname was Bell.

They used to have parties until 3am in the summer. Loud, music blaring, screeching karaoke.

We called them the Bell Ends 🙈

Mr Arsehole

I think this is a bit immature & unpleasant to share

We have -

Johnny Bravo - guy up the street who works out and is huge on top, but has clearly never done a leg day in his life. Unsure how his matchstick legs are supporting his upper body weight 😂

Beefcakes - Johnny Bravos brother who visits him almost daily (beefcakes is huge all over and doesn't skip leg day)

The Jitters - couple directly across the road who are up and down to the window every 2 minutes checking what's going on every time a car door opens/someone gets a delivery/someone had a visitor and are always asking "what was going on there"

The Garages - family across the road and up a bit who spend an inordinate amount of time fetching things in and out of their garage

Hahah🤣

Here's mine

• Shit for brains
• Captain bugger-nuts
• Rent-a-gob
• F-word

Oh. I forgot

Two Cats - really boring one, when we moved in we thought the woman had a cat that was very active and always going in and out. Found out she has 2 cats that look exactly the same

Got a guy called either Christian or Gabriel, something biblical. I never remember so I just call him Jesus.

Family of over 10 living in a 3 bed. Call them The Pontipines.

Raisin and Victor Meldew (old and moody)
The Pissog (gossip)
Lurch (That's how they look)
Old man wi' dog
Pelican (neck)

Old neighbours who we absolutely hated as they were all vicious scrotes:
Dock-Picker and Dirty Mop (self explanatory and she wore her hair in a grey chav bun that would flop over the fence when she was being nosey)
Their kids Rio, Cleo and Dolmio (one of those names and is real and the others were more ridiculous and "fancy")
Unwashed fanny (her house smelled like one when you walked past and the door was always open)
Crimson Chin (huge jaw)
4 kids to 10 dads (self explanatory)

I know this is very judgmental and possibly gossipy of me but tbf I would never, ever say these things in real life to these people or anyone else. That's just the first thing that pops into my head when I think about these people and sort of sticks! I don't have any nicknames for nice people. I live in a horrible place 😄

I also know my neighbours call me neighbourhood because when I walked in the pub one night, someone yelled neighbourhoods here, ask her

Yep, I'm a nosey fucker 🤣

I think I’m ok with dog less Dave. He had a dog, it died after the neighbour’s dog three doors up attacked and killed it. He still went for a walk every night on his own 😔

As a child we lived opposite Mr and Mrs Revver. I was surprised to find out eventually it wasn't their name at all.
Mr Revver had a habit of sitting in his clapped out van endlessly revving the engine.

@DoAClassicCamel Aww that's a sad story.

He always looked sad, and me and DH would watch him pass the window and one of us would say ‘aw there’s dogless Dave’
He’s moved away now and I have a feeling DH saw him a couple of months ago with a new dog. So we should really call him Dave again.

I’ve got Cheese man (lovely man who works at the cheese factory and gives out cheese) and The Spies (weirdos who need to be avoided or they will tell you a long winded story about when they were “working for the government “ in a country they’re not allowed to name etc etc.) Turns out he used to work for BT.

The perv moved away a few months ago.

i know everyone’s name now but still think of them by their nicknames.

These are the best, although I am glad I don't live on your street.

Gollum