Are people just less tolerant of disability accessibility now ?

[Takemeback02]

I have been raising a disabled child 11 years now and the first 5 ish years I never really dealt with many issues regarding to the assistance she received or disability access.
the last 5 years has been a real struggle. Usually transport / theme parks etc

most recently 6 of us went on holiday abroad to a European destination, 2 disabled children who require a lot of extra care with very high medical needs and equipment. We always check the hotels first and we speak to before choosing one that works for us. We picked a hotel that offered reserved disabled Sun beds. We arrived and they offered us 6 ( same as whole party ) but we told them we only needed 3. We chose ones away from the kids sections and to the side of the main pool,
they were reserved everyday. They placed disabled badge stickers on the beds for the duration of our stay. I reckon there
was 3 days out of 10 where we didn’t have an issue with someone taking them. Most would move on once asked but have a little moan as they did it and a few who got obviously very upset.

one of the days was a nightmare, we were at the pool bar and physically saw a women tair off the disabled badge sticker and throw it on the ground. I put it back on before going to get the kids
changed and when I got back lady was on bed and had removed the sticker again and lobbed it on the floor.

I just feel the last few years there is an obvious difference in peopls
Tolerance for accessibility or has it always been this way ?

don’t get me wrong I know from the past actual accessibility had got far better but it just feels like it annoys people now.

I doubt they have time to be experts, they seem to spend their days drowning in paperwork to try and get ANY resources at all to support children.

You can't be dyslexic if you are logical? 😂😂😂😂🥴 this is so wrong.

Dyslexia has nothing to do with logic. It's a language processing disorder. It can affect the ability to decipher, read and to write letters, words and sentences. People with dyslexia often can't figure out rhymes or puns and can struggle to retain information if it's in the wrong format for them to decipher but it doesn't make them illogical. I know a dyslexic woman who runs a chain of fast food restaurant's and I know a dyslexic man that has a degree in architecture and a masters in engineering. If anything people with dyslexia have stronger reasoning and logic skills than average 😂🤷🏼‍♀️.

And some schools, even when the child is clearly disabled, will do their level best to not fork out money to support said child.

I would always support that parent to get an EHCP. If the child does not need one, they will not get one. If they get one, it's because the LA agreed that they need one according to their criteria.

Who are the Sencos to say otherwise?

@Britneyfan excellent post.

Then you're believing them that their nasty opinions on parents trying do get what they can to support their child with needs, is somewhat unfounded.

Yes you're right. I'm a visibly disabled person and most people treat me horribly. Every time I go outside I am mocked in some way by people who feel it's OK to shout things at me. Even just shouting "wheelchair" at the top of your lungs is ableism unless you shout "legs" at every person who walks past. People feel entitled to say something to or about me. I've been hit by people being asked to move luggage on trains. Bus drivers slam the ramp down to hurt my ears when they get fed up of it being me waiting at the same stop every day. They feel entitled to moan about me using the bus during rush hour as though they assume I don't work. I get stopped for "shoplifting" all. the. time. Teenagers throw things at me. They stand in the pavement and refuse to move and say "run me over then" or they push each other in front of me. I have been spat at. Had old neighbours leaving obstacles on my doorstep and dog muck laughing about it. Council workmen do shoddy jobs upstairs as they know I can't check until my carer is home. People who come to my house to help me steal things. I've had druggie neighbours take medication from the pharmacy. Grown men shouting "pop a wheelie" in my ear while their families look on in disgust. The ambulance service would abandon my £9,000 chair in an emergency because they don't have a metal loop to secure it to. Premises don't have ramps or reasonable adjustments and don't care when you point out that's not to legislation. Almost everything I want to do in life is totally inaccessible to me. Apart from changing places toilets... who has actually been inside a fully accessible WC. Nobody cares. Except other disabled people.

Does not change the fact that is precisely what has been happening in the UK, under the Conservatives though. The British public has been receiving that message loud, and clear.

Next Friday (July 19th) is Changing Places Awareness day. They are amazing as they help people keep their dignity and give families more opportunities to go out together while removing some stress.

Standing and balance on a moving vehicle is difficult for me too. Most of the time there are other seats, thankfully. However, yesterday for example, two young women were in the priority seat nearest the door. They way they ran along the road after getting off the tram suggests they didn’t need to be. We have morphed into a society where everyone is very aware of their rights, but much less aware of the possible needs of anyone else.

I have stood up quite recently on a crowded bus to let a much older, frailer man sit down, when no one else appeared to even notice he could hardly stand. I somehow don’t think every other passenger was disabled.

20% of the population don't necessarily have a disability based on 20% of the population having a recognised condition.

Disability is the impact that a condition has on an individual, not the condition itself.

Most 'accessibility support' require the individual to prove the disabling impact that their condition has on their life. As you say, the 20% of people with these conditions, all of varying levels will all be impacted differently and therefore will not all be entitled to every or maybe any special adjustments.

Like others I think partly worsening attitudes to disabled people, which is definitely a thing, has a lot to do with the last government’s appalling scapegoating of people with disabilities and encouragement of “woke culture wars” to distract from the absolute carnage they inflicted on the economy and U.K. as a whole.

There is also the subtle but ongoing use of the media to imply that disability is a lifestyle choice.

When I first had a baby and went out on the buses with a buggy I was shocked to discover that we are supposed to somehow “share” the wheelchair space on buses. In my oblivious previous life, I’d simply never thought about it or noticed the problem. That’s a ridiculous thing which just pits 2 groups of people in need against each other. I agree in a head-on clash the person in a wheelchair clearly needs the space more, but the point is, it would be so much better if buses were built to accommodate both groups ie have a space for both. Especially given they can now put those fold up seats in so if they aren’t being used, it’s not like seats are lost. That whole clash only happens because of actual scarcity of those spaces.

This is going to be dependent on where you live though.
I'm in London. Quite often you can have many many people with buggies trying to get on a packed bus. So even if you design a bus with 2 or even 3 designated buggy spaces, there could still be an issue where there will be a 4th blocking the wheelchair space.
Plus if you start removing lots of seats and make them fold up ones only, if they are all being used by buggies, disabled people will have no where to sit as all the priority seats will now be fold up buggy spaces.
Wheelchair users campaigned long and hard for a space on buses. But now they often can't get on as people refuse to move buggies. Buggy owners can try and campaign for more spaces as well. But it could take a while and I imagine once people's babies are out of buggies those people will get bored of it and give up as it doesn't affect them anymore. And even if it did work, those same people that got upset over lack of buggy space would likely then be annoyed that there was generally less seats available on the bus for their 6 year old to sit down on. Or you'd get a buggy trying to get on but there's a disabled person in the pull down seat and blocking the buggy area.
The fact is in lots of places there is just too many people trying to get on too few buses. A normal size bus cannot accommodate a wheelchair space, 4 buggy spaces, priority seats as well as "normal" seats and all the people trying to cram on.

When I first had a baby and went out on the buses with a buggy I was shocked to discover that we are supposed to somehow “share” the wheelchair space on buses.

You are probably one of the few mums that realises that. Most forget the "share" bit.

@MyOtherWheelchairIsABroomstick

As a fellow wheelchair user I am absolutely horrified by what you've described. I experience prejudice in my daily life but nothing on a level like this, though I suppose things add up over time. I'm really sorry for what you've experienced

People parking pavements makes me really angry. The other day there was a CF parked on the pavement near the school near me. There was a reasonable gap but it would not have been wide enough for a wheelchair to get through. I accidentally on purpose knocked his wing mirror as I walked by and he had the CFery to tell me to watch where I was going. Arsehole.

One other thing: the fact that so many GPs require people to fill in online forms to seek help now. That is discriminatory against the elderly or disabled who aren't digitally savvy, and against those who can't fill in forms easily or express themselves well.

They say "get a friend or neighbour" to help. No, the onus is on YOU to provide reasonable adjustments, not the person with the disability! It's easy - make appointments over the phone or in person!

What hope do disabled people have, when medical services won't provide reasonable adjustments?

Not quite what I said. The only thing on the assessment related to logic I struggled with was being given a pattern and told to copy it. But you can give me numbers and ask me what the pattern is (odd, prime, etc) and I can see it.

He said that's normal for a visually impaired person. As everything else was "normal", he decided I can't be Dyslexic.

Your post makes a lot of sense. Unfortunately, many people don't see it that way. Not only does any form of requiring proof get shouted down as being not inclusive. A lot of it requires taking people at their word.

There have been several threads here for example with people trying to queue jump claiming their DC was autistic - the OP who refused to let them in was chastised. According to you it's obvious they shouldn't be allowed to queue jump. Autism is irrelevant. The specific difficulties caused are. You can't just say 'DC is autistic' and except everyone to give wah. Unless it's something blindingly obvious like people in a wheelchair needing more space.

Also threads complaining that just evidence of receiving PIP etc wasn't enough they had to describe difficulties in detail.

The rhetoric is that 'well, disabled people have a hard enough life just let them through'. But as I said

But there's a fine line between an accomodation being 'needed' - service would be inaccessible otherwise. A child that can't queue without having a meltdown for example.
And just 'making life easier' as some sort of compensation for hardship - like having to deal with ND DC all day, keep them engaged in the queue etc.

As conditions get harder for everyone more aren't going to be able to resist the temptation to make things easier even though it's strictly not needed. Of course CFs exist in every situation, disabled or otherwise.

I also think that allowing people to have things that they don't really "need" can cause issues with non disabled people -- children especially, as they do start to resent what other people "get" that they don't as it seems constant. Yes you can explain to children why they don't get the same concessions/adjustments but to a lot of children it will just seem unfair. They get told they must follow rules, but then all they see is people "breaking" them.
So if a NT child doesn't like wearing school shoes they get told they have to. But then they see John and Tina at school in trainers and they're allowed to do that because they're autistic.
They get told they have to sit through noisy classes for subjects they hate. But Mark and Mary have ADHD and have passes that mean they can leave when they want to move around.
They get told they must queue at theme parks and hardly get on any rides all day. But Tim doesn't have to as he has diabetes.
They get told they have to do a presentation for their class but hate speaking in front of people. But they need to do it to pass the exam. But Lesley doesn't have to because they have anxiety.

So it's not just the odd person that you see having adjustments. For children especially it can be constant. And yes, sometimes children can say they get these things in a "ner ner I'm jumping the queue and you can't" type way. It's not because they're horrible children. It's because they're just children. In the same way a child who's parent bought a fast pass might brag about it some disabled children might as well. They're growing up and sometimes get boastful. Then other children who are also just children, can get jealous. And this then over the years extends into adulthood and the same constant stream of other people "getting" things.
NT non disabled people have struggles as well albeit different ones obviously. It just gets draining when you're constantly made to "move over" for others. When sometimes you just want something for you. It's not bad. It's human nature.
(I'm autistic myself by the way and do struggle wording things so I apologise if it's a bit rambled)

I have noticed noticed a change as such except people `are more cynical now as the term disability has expanded.

No @PaperSheet you're not rambling you're perfectly correct. What you describe is the sort of reaction I suffered to reasonable adjustments that were made for me in mainstream around 30 years ago regarding leaving lessons early, to avoid corridor crowds, using a laptop and many other things. Times haven't changed it seems.

"They get told they have to sit through noisy classes for subjects they hate. But Mark and Mary have ADHD and "have passes that mean they can leave when they want to move around."

I find too much noise painful. Would a shutdown (where I can't physically speak) be preferable?

Its a need not a want

All this post does is show the massive levels of ignorance about disabilities

One is that rather than make places truly accessible, lots of venues go for the lazy option of having those with disabilities come in front of a queue so they can be assisted to move in a tight space etc

As a pp said, if you've waited til kids are old enough to manage a queue, and then have paid hundreds for tickets to something, and the queues are worsened by a high volume of people brought to the front, it feels "unfair" or frustrating. This is especially true if you are somewhere it is a given you will wait/queue for long periods.

Not saying i feel this way but there'll be people who do.

What it shows is people, especially children, are human.
Do I think an autistic child should be taken to an access queue? Of course.
Do I think someone with hearing loss in one ear should be? Actually no I don't.
Do I think an autistic child who can actually happily wait in a queue should be taken to the front? No I don't.
All adjustments should be need based. Anyone who cannot queue for whatever reason should not have to. Those that can, should. Regardless of disability or not.
I'm autistic. I can queue. Should I get to go to go to the front of a queue? Thereby making the access queue longer for those that actually need it? Even though I don't need to be there? My life is harder than some so apparently because of that I should get to. But by me doing that, I'm now making the life harder of those that can't queue because the queue is now longer and might become inaccessible for them.