To want to write to the governors about my DD's suspension?

[UndertheCedartree]

I'm looking for a bit of help. Last week my 12 yo DD was suspended from school for half a day. She has autism and struggles. She didn't want me to leave her and was crying and clinging to me. I tried to get her to go with a member of staff for half an hour but she wouldn't. So the head teacher had to suspend her and send her home. They said I can write a statement to the governors. Does anyone know what I need to say? Is just that it was due to her ASD?

Also if the headteacher keeps suspending her can she be expelled? This is the one and only time she has ever been suspended but it just got me worried.

You should really put this topic in SEN section of this forum. People there would be able to advise as they have similar challenges.

I personally don't think that there a different treatement for kids with ASD
if she is in the mainstream school. They expect all children to obey school policy.

I sincerely doubt she could be expelled for " not wanting to go with the staff member", unless she has done some serious disciplinary misconduct.

You have not really described why and where she suppose to go with the staff member.

Talk to SEN Co at school about how to prevent future situations like that.

It’s a tricky one, do you have an EHCP in place for your child? Technically a child can only be suspended I think it is 45 days before exclusion takes place however they can exclude before that. They would have to be very careful excluding a child where the issue was due to autism though as it could be discriminatory. The school would have to be able to show that excluding the child is a proportionate way of achieving a legitimate aim, so say if your child was routinely causing problems in lessons and it was disturbing other pupils then they could say that in order to enable the rest of the class to learn it was necessary to exclude your child. I think if it was just a one off issue with drop off nothing more will come of it but is potentially worth getting in touch with governors as the suspension will be on her school record and so it would be useful for info to show what the reason was

Was it just a normal school day she was supposed to be in for? In which case I’ve never heard of suspending someone for refusing to go in- it would just be an unauthorised absence at worst. Unless they were causing a massive, disruptive scene deliberately to the detriment of others learning.

Or was it that they were supposed to have a consequence, like a detention or apology to a teacher or something? That’s the only time my school would then go to suspension, is that they won’t accept or do the consequence, so it escalates.

They can't just say 'go home' as that counts as illegal exclusion.
But further than that I can't help.

Is this a state school? It costs £1000s to expel a child, so highly unlikely!

Why specifically did they suspend her? Is this quite a strict school?!?! At my school you'd have to do something pretty bad to get suspended!

If she was struggling and wouldn't go in and was clearly distressed, then why didn't you just take her home?

It sounds - though I'm sure the OP will give us further information - like the OP left her DD with staff and she then refused to do as she was asked. It's hard to know what else they could have done, though I wouldn't have let the parent simply leave a child in such distress and non-compliance in the first place.

Definitely think more context is needed:
Does she have a formal diagnosis and EHCP/support worker?
Was this the first time she has done this?
Was she 'just crying' or was it a full on screaming fit in the reception area?
Is it a state or private school (policies will change)
Was she verbally or physically abusive to the staff while they were trying to reason with her.

Very difficult situation OP.

My daughter has been marked sick if she can't attend due to mental health/autism, I'm shocked she was suspended!

They suspended her for crying and being upset?! Or did they just send her home? There is a difference, suspension is for bad behaviour etc, and it doesn’t sound like she was badly behaved.

I don’t understand on what basis a suspension was needed? What is dd being punished for?

Sounds like they did it as an act of kindness as she was school refusing, so had to go home. I’m not sure what you expected them to do?

Because then it would go down as an absence, possibly unauthorised, and too many of them the school will get on your back (as the county make them do).

School’s can not just ‘send some one home.’ The only reasons schools can send a child home is if they are ill or if they suspend them. Autism / ADHD etc is not an illness. For those saying that their child’s head teacher has sent the child home and authorised it as illness due to ‘mental health’ that’s skirting very close to an illegal exclusion and I’ve supported several head teachers who have done this with the best of intentions and then, further down the line, when the problem has got worse had parents turn round and accuse them of “doing nothing and just sending him/her home” and then suddenly the head finds themself in the middle of an investigation for illegal exclusion.

Your head has done the right thing. If your child refused or couldn’t regulate themselves to be able to come into school then they should be suspended. That’s not the same as ‘blaming’ the child for this if it is due to a condition. If it happens multiple times then that can be used as evidence for additional support and you can work with the school to determine what that looks like. Ultimately if the additional support doesn’t work then it’s evidence for a needs assessment. If they've already got an EHCP then this is a new behaviour and barrier and if it continues the EHCP should be reviewed and additional support added. Suspensions are often a way to get additional support rather than always a bad thing. And they are transparent as you will have a letter saying why and you should now be offered a meeting about how the school can support you and your child moving forward. I’d spend my time doing that rather than arguing the toss with governors about a half day suspension,

Not every ASD has a EHCP. Actually, minority has. EHCP is given if there are educational needs or a child poses a danger to herself or other kids.

Surely this would go down as 'school refusal' rather than a suspension?

Did she lash out at the member of staff while she was upset OP?

Exactly! So how she is dealt with would likely be influenced by that.

She was supposed to either go to student services or the learning support centre or to her form room. She wanted to go home.

No EHCP but I have asked for an EHCNA.

She doesn't cause any problems in lessons.

And yes, that was what I was thinking, thank you.

And they suspended her just for this? If there wasn't anything else that she did then surely the pastoral care failed. They should ask her about why she wants to go home and what is happening.
I would write to governors if the suspension was just over it

I would also have a look at the Not Fine in School group (have found that invaluable, particularly the FB page). I am sorry things are tricky (my daughter is also autistic). https://notfineinschool.co.uk/?fbclid=IwZXh0bgNhZW0CMTAAAR1oyPJbUfmeut-CtEHvRNN9X1G1r4kg4Uxapm3cvrm1nXPOO6_zdIlrrzs_aem_BOBF8SFiSf8IfJZbaYaqHQ

I’d be raging if the school gave my child a suspension for being distressed.

Punishment under these circs is completely regressive. I’d consider contacting my local DIAS service or try a national charity like SOS SEN or IPSEA (ask who they recommend to get advice from if they can’t help)

in this day and age! Ffs.

Yes. She wasn't causing a massive scene or affecting anyone else. We were actually in a room and the learning mentor and myself were trying to talk to her. But she didn't want to go with her learning mentor and they can't just send her home so they suspended her.

Was she given an actual official suspicion, or were you just asked to take her home as they couldn’t physically get her into school?

But that’s not what they did. Either you’ve misunderstood or didn’t read it.

the child refused to go on, the op spent 30 mins trying in an anti room, and she refused, so they suspended for half a day so she could go home as it’s the only way they can allow her to go home.

That's good to know!

They suspended her for not following instructions. It's strict but reasonable. Not one of these ridiculous schools.

I did take her home and was then emailed the suspension notice!