To want to write to the governors about my DD's suspension?

[UndertheCedartree]

I'm looking for a bit of help. Last week my 12 yo DD was suspended from school for half a day. She has autism and struggles. She didn't want me to leave her and was crying and clinging to me. I tried to get her to go with a member of staff for half an hour but she wouldn't. So the head teacher had to suspend her and send her home. They said I can write a statement to the governors. Does anyone know what I need to say? Is just that it was due to her ASD?

Also if the headteacher keeps suspending her can she be expelled? This is the one and only time she has ever been suspended but it just got me worried.

My SEN daughter gets sent home all the time from high school if she's not coping.

Do they count it as illness as in sending her home because of her mental health? Or do they just informally exclude her?

They could get themselves in trouble if informally excluding her. But I can't see anything issue with sending a DC home due to her mental health.

They just send her home and it's down as authorised absence. Her attendance is about 80% but in reality it's much lower as they often try and keep her into get her afternoon attendance mark then send her home.

Plus alot of the time she isn't in lessons. She's in the office, or SEN room or library.

I know that it feels like your DD is the only child with needs, but it's not the case (they wouldn't have any of those facilities if it were). And if it happens once on a particularly bad day, it'll become particularly bad everyday, as she'll know that it's something that can happen and instead of being in Reception, it'll be around all the other students. I've seen it tried and seen a child who was usually OK in a couple of minutes once their parent left massively escalating and distressing other students with SEND - and, not that you'd like this, another three students suddenly starting exactly the same behaviour after seeing it resulting in one parent coming in and more parents notifying the SENDCO that if x child can have that, they wanted it as well.

The wellbeing mentor has other children, whatever you may believe. Tying her up supervising you in school means that she cannot support the other children that definitely exist and you would have to be signed in, issued a pass, followed everywhere, watched, all to maintain the safety of other students. It would be a huge safeguarding headache that would not be acceptable to Ofsted or the LA if they were to inspect.

As they've said, it's not primary. They cannot facilitate you coming into school each day to have her with those reactions in a place that is specifically for all students that need it, not just one student whose Mum feels it is only there for her daughter's use and nobody else can possibly need it.

It's just not feasible and in all probability not remotely helpful in a secondary setting.

A part time timetable has to be agreed for a short time and a place found in AP (where you could well have exactly the same issues at drop-off). Funding from an EHCP and a place to be available would make it more likely. But then it would go back to exactly the same fulltime schooling again after a maximum of a term, usually.

The school cannot meet your daughter's needs. Hopefully an EHCP can be obtained where she can access educational provision that is suitable.

DD's school have been complaining about her not being in lessons but it isn't a massive amount. Is she on her own or with a learning mentor (or similar) out of interest? Is she doing work or something else? Just trying to figure out what is reasonable.

Where did I say she was the only one with needs? Every DC in her school has needs!! It doesn't feel like she is the only DC with needs - what an odd thing to say!!

I said she is the only DC that is brought into school by a parent. Which is true.

And I'm sorry, that is utter bullshit that it would become a bad day every day. She doesn't have bad days on purpose!! She has autism ffs! It never became a bad day every day at Primary, why would it at Secondary? She is around other students in reception. She would not be in the wellbeing room. And the issue is she isn't ok in a couple of minutes!! And as I said she would not be around any other SEN students.

Of course the learning mentor has other DC! Which is why I'm suggesting something that would reduce the time she would need to spend with DD. I'm hardly likely to suggest something that will make it worse!

I already sign in and get a pass every morning. And I wouldn't be wandering around the school being followed by the LM - I'd be in the wellbeing room for 15 minutes or less. And why is it more of a safeguarding issue in Secondary but fine in Primary??

And as I've clearly said it would not be every day. Maybe once every 3 weeks. And again as I said the wellbeing room is for one student at a time.

So me suggesting something that would mean DD would use the room less and therefore it being available to other students more is an issue? I'm afraid you're not making any sense. You're just making things up!

Again I've done a part time timetable before so I know how it works. She would clearly be at home when not at school not going elsewhere! And yes of course as I said it is for transitioning. We did it at this school last year too.

Unfortunately, I can't get an EHCP right now as school have told the LA they can meet her needs. However they've not put a proper plan in place for DD. Hopefully with that we may not need an EHCP. But I'm still going to follow the process in case she does need one.

I go into that exact room for meetings. Is that a safeguarding issue too?!

If AP was included in an EHCP it would not have to be short term.

When I said ”It [a part-time timetable] should not be a long-term solution. Long term DC should either be in school full time or alternative provision made as well as/instead of full-time school unless full-time education in any form isn’t appropriate (which doesn't sound the case here especially if education in other forms hasn’t even been considered).” I meant considered by professionals. Things like a care farm, online tuition, tuition centre, home tuition…

Meetings are not the same. Don’t bring them into it with the school.

Ah, ok, thank you!

I'm just baffled by all the 'this is secondary school therefore we can't do x y or z.' There doesn't seem to be any reason why except 'this is secondary school.' Very confusing.

I think you need to push more for an EHCP. Your daughter’s needs are obviously not being met at this school and it is not fair on her or anyone else. It sounds as if she needs a more specialist setting. I would contact IPSEA for advice. They are very good.

I actually don't think she does. She was fine in mainstream Primary. She may need an EHCP and I am pushing for that. The EHCNA was turned down as the school said they could meet her needs. But I am appealing. In the meantime I want a proper plan in place to support her.

Secondary is a very different environment compared to primary. Some who manage well in primary find secondary overwhelming even with support.

Yes, that's true. I think all the new routines and lots of different teachers has been hard. I'm trying to look for anything else I can do to support DD in September. She's resistant to anything new I suggest but hopefully can sort some things.

I'm looking at discrete fidgets and maybe a visual timetable to make it easier to see what is happening.