To want to write to the governors about my DD's suspension?

[UndertheCedartree]

I'm looking for a bit of help. Last week my 12 yo DD was suspended from school for half a day. She has autism and struggles. She didn't want me to leave her and was crying and clinging to me. I tried to get her to go with a member of staff for half an hour but she wouldn't. So the head teacher had to suspend her and send her home. They said I can write a statement to the governors. Does anyone know what I need to say? Is just that it was due to her ASD?

Also if the headteacher keeps suspending her can she be expelled? This is the one and only time she has ever been suspended but it just got me worried.

And do you disagree with this, it’s hard to tell whay you’re acrually thinking. Did you feel they should have done something different?

Ok that’s different to what you wrote before, which was she refused to go in.

Please speak to Sendiass in your area who are able to advise you (free).

This isn't okay.

(pa I also like not fine in school)

Sorry to add to that her attendance is low so I have them on my back about that hence me not wanting to take her home and get another absence. They said they'd suspend her, so I said fine and took her home.

Are you saying they offered to let you take her home without suspension but you didn't want to affect her poor attendance, or have I misunderstood?

Apologies if I have.

I hadn't left her I was there the whole time. And yes, in the moment it was difficult to know what to do. She needed to come home. She had a nap and some relaxation at home and we did a bit of work they gave us. It actually did her the world of good. She was much happier the next day. I think part of it is she gets so tired.

So, if she went into school, vomited everywhere - she wouldn’t be allowed to go home unless she was suspended?

@UndertheCedartree

Head teachers can only exclude for disciplinary reasons. Anything else amounts to unlawful exclusion.

https://www.ipsea.org.uk/pages/category/exclusion-from-school

It sounds like the school is not meeting your child's needs, so they need to start putting support and reasonable adjustments in place as they are legally required to do. If necessary they need to seek professional advice. Sending her home is not an option, as this is unlawful exclusion. I would be making this very clear to the governors too.

https://www.ipsea.org.uk/advice-on-writing-written-representations-to-the-governors

Refer to the Statutory Guidance

"It would be unlawful to exclude a pupil simply because they have SEN or a disability that the school feels it is unable to meet.." Page 16.

I see you have already applied for an EHCNA. Use this incident as evidence that the school is unable to meet needs.

Information here if your child is unable to attend school:

https://www.ipsea.org.uk/school-anxiety

She has a formal diagnosis of ASD. She doesn't have an EHCP or 1:1 LSA but there is always an LSA in her class.

No, it's not the first time but this was the most extreme. We did have a similar situation in her first term where she had a complete meltdown but did go up to Learning support where she fell asleep and after an hour they asked me to pick her up.

So we were in a room off reception. She started off crying and raising her voice a bit but we managed to calm her down but she still didn't want to go with her learning mentor.

Sorry, it is a state school. She was not abusive.

If she's really tired all the time, might there be another underlying medical issue?

I'm having problems with them due to attendance!

Was this when your DD had physically gone into school?

The more I think about it, maybe it should have been an authorised absence as they could clearly see she was in no fit state!

I'm wondering if they should have sent her home as mentally unwell, really.

They can't just send her home aside from that unless they suspend her. They said it was a health and safety issue due to her not following instructions. She wasn't badly behaved. She's just autistic.

So you left them with no choice but to suspend her because you didn't want to take her home?

It was for health and safety. She wasn't being punished.

They could have marked her down as a school refusal.

The thread isn't about what I expected them to do it's about what I should write to the governors.

I have been in this situation more times than I can count and the school never ever have suspended her!! It’s absolutely bloody outrageous! Absolutely write to the governors - that school is a disgrace!

We have similar issues with our child and they have never been suspended. They allow us to take them home if they are too distressed and keep in touch throughout the day. Some days they manage to get in later. My child had an awful mental breakdown this morning and didn’t go in. Pastoral care told us not to worry about school in that moment, to try to get them in later if we could, but mental health was more important than school. My child came out of whatever he was processing, definitely in flight mode, and went to sleep. I’ll check tomorrow what it has been marked down as.

They'd wanted to illegally exclude her but I'd pointed out they couldn't. And of course it would have been marked as another absence.

ASD is not an illness but the related anxiety is. She was in no fit state for school due to her mental illness so I'm thinking of making that clear to the Governors.

To be clear I'm not specifically seeing the suspension as a good or bad thing. I'm just thinking what I need to say to the governors about it.

And sorry, where did I say I was going to 'argue the toss' with the governors?

I've been asked to make a statement and I'm asking what to include!!

No she didn't lash out.

Thank you

Again Google sendiass and your area.

They're set up to advise and found these types of situations and do so regularly
More so than random mumsnetters.

This is going to be a bigger issue than writing a letter.