To think this is absolutely joyless of nursery?

[Bettycrockered]

DD attends a private nursery and if you want to, on their birthdays you send them in with a shop brought cake and some candles. Everyone sings happy birthday and the cake gets shared out.

There is around 40 kids in the room, so an average of one birthday a week. By the time the cake is cut down to share, each kid gets a small cube of sponge and jam.

one of the parents via a nursery/parent forum has complained that they feel the cube of cake a few times a month is excessive sugar and so now there’s no birthday cake. On their birthday, the child sits in a chair and everyone sings happy birthday. Once a month the chef will instead bake a sugar free cake for each room and they have a little party instead.

AIBU to think this is totally joyless? DD doesn’t even like cake so I’ve seen the minuscule cubes of cake that come home with her. The meal plan at the nursery is really nutritious and varied - a little cube of sponge cake surely isn’t that big an issue? They could always alternate the children’s pudding with the cake rather than getting rid of it.

YABU - kids eat too much sugar as it is
YANBU - moderation is fine

Does seem a bit mean if its literally a cube! And that's coming from someone who tries not to give their kids too much sugar

Don’t be giving them ideas….

Utterly miserable.

At my kids' nursery they ask us to buy a specific brand of chocolate cake which the kids like and which they know has no allergens or alcohol in it, so that's what they have every time someone has a birthday. It's a lovely thing for them.

I know! As PP said - probably a naturally sweetened cake.

Suspect the alternative would be fruit or jelly..

It was for my kid with an allergy and it left him really sad. He is ok now he is older but at nursery it wasn't great

Mmm sugar free cake. Full of artificial sweetener which is so much better 🙄

Our nursery had a similar complaint. They now bring out a huge wedge of watermelon with candles on it. The kids love when it's their turn.

So yes, I agree batshit parenting - but the alternatives can be fun.

I've had one sweetened with mashed bananas.

I made sugar free cake (actually no added sugar because it was banana cake) and that was allowed in. I think it should all be no added sugar or salt for kids under 5 to be honest.

I suspect they mean just not adding actual sugar, so fruit or veg.

When I was a kid I don't think we ever had cakes for people's birthdays, but we did have sugary puddings every day, lol. That was all I ate in primary school was the treacle sponge!
I also am wondering how healthy a sugar free cake would be? Surely it must have loads of dodgy sweeteners? If they use honey or maple syrup then it's the same as normal sugar anyway?
It does seem a bit miserable. But there is a big issue with childhood obesity right now. I guess it must be to do with that.

Completely joyless which seems to be the default setting of nearly everything at the moment.

Oh OP, you’ve just reminded me of the very naice small nursery I used to own 20yrs ago and we ended up with a wooden cake with the slices stuck together with Velcro and a blunt wooden knife for the birthday child to cut up as we sang happy birthday. We’d then pretend to eat it.
Joyless!
One small cube of cake a month just isn’t an issue.

DC1s nursery did candles on fruit for birthdays
DC2s nursery allowed them to bring cake and have candles but the cake would be given to the parent at the door to take home, never eaten in nursery.

I was happy with both options

Sounds like a monthly cake would be better for these kids as an alternative could be planned for.

They had cake at our nursery, only if you paid the cook to make one. I think it was more about allergies than sugar.

If they nursery are feeding them day in day out they'll have something suitable in, or the parents can supply a stash of safe treats (which is that we do).

It’s joyless but I wouldn’t be blaming the nursery. Some parents make staffs lives hell so management will just do things to keep them happy. It’s wrong but as a teacher (and former nursery worker) parents (like this) are literally the worst part of the job!

Schools don't allow and am surprised nurseries still do.

It's a faff for the staff and they have to worry about allergies.

Plus I bet there's a bunch of parents quite happy not to have the hassle of rustling up a cake for nursery.

But they aren't. They are making a cake once a month.

What a sad sack that mother is to stop everyone having cake ! Her kid will be obsessed with food later in as she is a sugar nut

So we are looking at a sugar free, egg free and dairy free cake……

so…. Air?

I say this as a parent with a child with an egg allergy. She was fine with a nice alternative they provided.

Yes, yet another staple in the coffin of kids having fun!

I'd be pretty unimpressed if my nursery fed my child with a food allergy some home made cake!

So sugar = joy ???

Bollocks. Sugar = weight gain + tooth decay.