to be an equally shit neighbour?

[SkyeB86]

In 2019 a new family moved in next door and immediately they started acting a problem. Then lockdown happened and it escalated. Big heavy basketballs thud constantly from morning till night, kids (6 of them) scream at each other (and I mean blood-curdling screams at times) they think it's fine to jump into my garden whenever they fancy. I had a word with the dad, his response was that other than them jumping in my garden, they're not breaking any laws so he wouldn't be telling the kids to quiet down. Fair enough, they're not.

So I've bought some Bluetooth speakers. Whenever they get too noisy, I play music in my garden which effectively drowns them out, and can only be really be heard from NDNs garden. The dad has this weekend asked me to keep it down.

AIBU to think that if they can have the 'fuck everyone else' attitude, then so can I?

Tell him you will when his kids do

”Hi neighbour, I completely understand you can’t control the noise your children make, so in the interest of good neighbourly relations I’m just making sure I don’t have to listen to them. If this bothers you, I’ll be more than happy to lower the volume when your kids do.”

Tell him you only play music when his noise disturbs you.

Sometimes fire with fire is the only language these sorts of people understand!

My response would be something along the lines of-

"I use the speaker to drown out the excessive noise from your house. Stop giving me a need for it and both our problems will be gone."

Seems fair enough. Just be aware if you ever want to sell you don't want any disputes on record.

“I’m not breaking any laws mate, so no I won’t quieten down. You calm your kids, I’ll calm my music “
done

hm.. his children are not intentionally making a noise to disturb you, this is what kids do and are entitled to do, you on the other hand are intentially making a noise to disturb them! Can i assume that this noise only goes on during normal hours and do not go on into the wee hours of the morning?

have you spoken to the council re the noise disturbance, do you have a noise diary? what about making contact with your locaL PCSO to see if there is some form of mediation available.

The adults are intentionally not telling them to keep noise at a reasonable level. I grew up youngest of 4, and also 2 cousins. We had a great childhood, but if we'd have made half this noise we'd have been told to shut up or come inside

'I'm more of a living and live kind of person. I haven't made one complaint about your kids have I?'

whats a resonable level? reasonable for who? you i guess!

Turn it up louder.

I think most reasonable people know full well what a reasonable level is

My neighbours were like this - fire with fire was the only approach that worked with them, and it has worked well. If they are disturbing you and don’t care there is absolutely no reason you should care when you drown them out with your music.

Well like he said to you no laws are being broken..he can jog on

Tell him oh sorry about that, I struggle to hear my music over other noises. Maybe get your kids to make a little less noise and I won't have to play it so loud in order to hear it.

He'll know what you are actually saying.

his children are not intentionally making a noise to disturb you, this is what kids do and are entitled to do, you on the other hand are intentially making a noise to disturb them!

As I read it, OP isn't playing music in order to disturb NDNs but to drown out their noise while not disturbing any other neighbours. That seems reasonable, because NDN adults already have the noise of their kids in their own house & garden & apparently they don't mind that.

the op has said that they play music in a way that only the NDN can hear...

Why are you so angry? 😂 It's music I'm playing, I'm not throwing grenades over the fence, becky

what makes you think i am angry? i can just see it from both points of view.. i think that you playing music so loud that it annoys only your neighbour is just asking for trouble.

what makes you qualified to decide what is a reasonable amount of noise that children should make?

i've suggested contacting the council, I've suggested a noise diary.. i am assuming that you've already tried this route and been advised they are not causing an issie.. so you have taken matters into your own hands.

this

Knew there'd be one trying to insult me with the 'karen' jibe 😂

Ok Becky. Calm thyself.

im perfectly calm thank you,... you however appear to be getting a wee bit rattled!

i notice you are chosing to ignore my sensible suggestions.. have a lovely evening, perhaps it will rain where ever you are and then the kids will go play inside.