I’ll try and keep it brief and not lose all my dignity!
Im in my late thirties for context.
I’m mentoring a girl in her twenties at work, and I can’t stop ruminating about how jealous I am of her. She’s at the age where she’s out every weekend, amazing social life. She’s really pretty, dresses well and is SMART. She’s good at her job and has so much potential. She’s friendly to everyone, and I do really like her.
My life is no longer like this, and I miss it so much.
In addition, she’s started seeing a guy at work… who had previously expressed interest in me. It seemed pretty innocent at first and he was friendly and a bit flirty with me, and then sent me some extremely sexual messages about the fantasies he’d had about us. I got cold feet because it felt inappropriate (it’s a colleague and I’m older) and the chat went dry. But now she’s seeing him, I can’t get him out of my head. Classic want what you can’t have I guess. She doesn’t know about any of the flirtation between us before as far as I’m aware.
How do I proceed? I feel like I’ve done a good job of not showing my feelings (hurt and envy) but I don’t know how much longer I can keep it up.
Additionally any advice about how to lose these horrible feeling would be so appreciated… its making me feel awful!