Who here sleeps well? And do you know why that is?

[loveyouradvice]

I would really love to hear from people who sleep well, and why they think it is.

At the moment, I think there are three groups:

• Those who learnt to sleep well as a child: it is just a habit
• Those who do lots of physical work or exercise and are so tired they just go to sleep
• Those who've learnt to sleep well later in life - probably using relaxation/meditation or similar

I used to be in the first group, but for various family reasons life has been tough, my sleep went to pot and I'm now "relearning" and yes, meditation surprisingly is helping me.

And if you've learnt to sleep well - how have you done it?

I have always found sleep difficult, including when I was a fulltime professional sportsman. Oh and I do maths for fun, and for work, plenty cogs spinning around.

I stopped drinking at home (unless it’s a special occasion or I have have people over for dinner) and do the cognitive shuffle when going to sleep.

Good for you?

I said everyone I know. Not the entire world.

Fascinating thread - Im looking forward to reading ever post... unexpectedly busy weekend so sorry not to have been back earlier... See you all later and enjoy the sunshine!

Until my early 30s I had such an amazing sleep. Excercise helped. Not sure what happened after🤣

I used to be a good sleeper, 8-9 hours a night, no problems falling asleep, deep sleep. I was a bit smug about it tbh. Didn't do must exercise. I don't think mental stimulation during the day makes any difference to sleep, in fact it's more likely to keep you awake.

Menopause arrived and it all crumbled, waking up at 3am and not able to go back to sleep. So I had to put a whole lot of strictures in place I'd never needed before:

• windows open at night
• cooling gel pad
• magnesium
• no screens (except kindle) after 9pm
• meditation
• breathing techniques
• no alcohol
• no caffeine after midday

I think a lot of it is down to luck, whether you sleep well (leaving aside hormones, pets, children etc).

Me too.. I go mad with dh if he moves at all before I'm asleep.. it's like I miss my slot and don't sleep all night.

Sleeping is my super power. Mind you, I had 10-12 years when I was woken up every night by DS (ASD) and then DD (baby) or, if I wasn't I thought I would be. DH slept through everything and, when the tables turned, I just said "poor you, didums, don't wake me up"

I struggle due to menopause and a snoring DH. But thanks for making me feel stupid and unfit.

I've discovered Yorkshire tea bedtime. It has vanilla and nutmeg. That's also helpful, having a cup before bed.

HRT and mirtazapine and no alcohol = 8 hours of uninterrupted sleep 😴 😀

Ah interesting. So there must be something in the nutmeg theory! I was curious re the turkey. Unless you get turkey slices and eat before bed?!

I have found too but useless if you’re on a diet, carby biscuits with cheese seem to knock me out.

Wow what a fascinating thread - I am learning SO much!!!

I'm intrigued @Tracey123097 How on earth did you sleep train your husband? I'd love the step by step 6 month guide - mine has always been an insomniac and I'd love to try!!

@HereWeGoRoundAgain Wow!! That is SO impressive, turning your sleep round in 6 months - I am in awe. Love to know what sort of magnesium supplement you used and how much, and ditto cbd oil (and when you took that compared to when you wanted to fall asleep)

Loving all these replies - lots to digest. Thank you!!

@loveyouradvice I did the Sleepstation NHS programme, take a standard 375g magnesium carbonate from Lloyds or Boots (bisglycinate would be better but it's much more expensive), and the cbd oil I take is the Trip Dream drops - about £32 ish on amazon I think.

The Sleepstation programme is mostly stuff we all know already, but it really does focus your mind on implementing it consistently, and that's the key. It's a two month programme and I still use the techniques every night. The magnesium I take about an hour before bed, and the cbd drops as I get ready for bed and begin reading. I really rate the cbd I have to say, but it's still a small crutch I suppose.

Don't get me wrong, I still wake a night or two a week but it's no longer distressing like it used to be when it could be two hours at a time for weeks on end. Now I go for a quick wee, get back in to bed and am usually asleep again with ten minutes or so. If it's one of those when you know it's going to be a while, I get up, make a half cup of hot chocolate and take a book to the spare room. Am usually dozing within 40 mins. Still a great improvement. And most importantly I've just tried to stop worrying about it so much.

And as others have said upthread, the whole eight hours uninterrupted concept can be a hindrance. This article changed my perspective greatly - it's not without it's critics but it did help me see I'm not a freak and there just night be reasons for my struggles!

BBC News - The myth of the eight-hour sleep
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-16964783

Sleeping better helps me make better food choices in the day and take a bit more exercise as I've got more energy. Which in turn all helps support better sleep, and so on. I'm a nicer person to be around, my mood is ten times more stable, and i feel like a half way decent adult! It's a virtuous circle - sleep affects my whole life. I'll prioritise it over practically everything else.

That whole routine also broke my ten year over the counter sleeping tablet use as well. Three or four times a week almost every week for around ten years. Occasionally I'd be able to go a month or so without but I'd always be back on them eventually. Six months without now and I'm thrilled!

I am fortunate that I sleep really well, I go to bed by 10 and wake by 7, solidly. Even when I have a worry, my bodies way to cope is to sleep heavily.
The only times I had bad sleeps was when I had 2 breakdowns, then it was impossible.

@HereWeGoRoundAgain I'm not surprised you're thrilled!! That's so impressive... and I agree about prioritising sleep over everything else: I'm definitely a much nicer and more effective person when well slept!!