I've gone for a walk

[longdistanceclaraclara]

I've walked out of the house. Kids have been annoying ( making food for lunch yesterday that they didn't take to school, opening cans of Diet Coke they don't drink, making drinks with ice that they don't drink, etc) husband is fighting with them
So I've removed myself from the situation. It's a beautiful evening, I'm in the park and wondering when they'll all notice dinner isn't appearing at the usual time.

I'm totally fucked off with all of them.

Do you think they'll notice?!

Well the kids might be able to fend for themselves but what about him indoors?? Goodness knows there might be something that he needs in the fridge (centre of the middle shelf just under nose level) that he can't find?? How on earth will he cope?? Perhaps kids will help. Or perhaps they will ignore him whimpering and have their revenge!!!

Good for you. Sometimes we must put ourselves first.

You must miss your little pup a lot. Dog walks are so lovely and calming. 💐

When mine were both little and being awful to each other/ disobedient/ loud and nothing else worked, I'd make sure they were safe (separated with DVDs, books, jigsaws or whatever) and I'd put myself in time out. I'd literally go and sit on the stairs with a cup of tea, for a bit of peace. Now that they're teenagers, I'd absolutely walk off for a while instead. They actually get along much better now though.

I’m conflicted on this. My mother would always disappear when things weren’t going well. Trouble is it can trigger fears of abandonment. I think at least you should say what you are doing and why.

I’ve often thought about doing this. Good for you….

I’ve been there myself multiple times! It was around an hour before the phone calls and messages started. But it was a beautiful, peaceful hour!

Have a glorious evening!

Exactly!

I drove down to the coast in the early hours once and had a whole day away because they all pissed me off so much. Sometimes you just need to recharge and reset with some head space.

I'm sorry to hear about that. But they're 13. Old enough to be aware that they were being little shits, also busy arguing with their father.

Judging by the politeness and making dinner OPs walking out this once worked. Announcing it would have the opposite effect actually.

Way to go!
But don’t sit in the park. I did this to this and walked out after a row with DH, but unfortunately got locked in. When when I finally got home he hadn’t even noticed.

I actually agree with this. It would be considered toxic if a husband/wife did this - just walked out after a row and radio silence for a few hours. I think a text to say you’re fine, you need some space to calm down and you’ll be back at x time would be a much healthier way to approach this.

I used to do this regularly. Go buy myself a big bar of chocolate and a coffee and drive to the beach. It really relieves your stress. Stop buying the coke then they'll realise u mean business

Stay in the park and get wine x

I did this once. Took myself off to Premier Inn for the night. It was bliss!!!

I locked up my bike outside the premier inn the other day and had totally forgotten until that moment that I’d done exactly the same 13 years ago! Just went on strike! I probably just slept. I can’t remember. I do know that I needed to just have my own temporary box of space.

Wow that’s a first (in my experience anyway), a feminist heckle from a lorry driver.

I think I was feeling a bit hormonal and things got a bit much for me. Put the children to bed and went and sat outside the back door. It was pouring with rain, sat for at least an hour, was not missed until DH came out to put something in the bin. Said to me what are you doing here you'll get soaked! and went back inside. I stayed for a bit longer but realised it was never going to have the desired effect which I think, hoped, would be a bit of sympathy and what's the matter, can I help? As an act of rebellion it was a total "wash-out" especially as I had had a perm the day before (kids in school and nursery) so you can imagine what I looked like after being in the rain for over an hour!!

It sounds like you needed this for lots of reasons. I'm so sorry about your dog

Single mother of teenagers here. You have my entire sympathies. Your DCs are with another parent should they need anything and it's not like you left them entirely on their own (which would also be okay for a little while given their age). Hope you left it a good few hours before going back.

And I'm sorry to hear about your dog OP.

Sorry about your dog. We had to do the same a while ago and I had no idea I’d miss her this much.

She’s not 15! Who drinks wine alone in a park as an adult? After a row and stress, just about the worst thing to do is drink. MN has a really unhealthy attitude to alcohol being the answer to everything, when in most cases it just makes things worse.

Good for you! I'm thinking a great idea to make a habit of doing this. Great safety valve.

Might be a good idea to lay down some non-negotiable rules sometime soon. 13 yr olds won't improve, just get worse, for years yet. Do you want to live like this until they leave home? Of course not! You'll go crazy!
And when the rules are broken, and they will be, have a plan on how to respond.
Such as, going on strike. You wanted your laundry doing? Dinner?
Funny, I wanted......( whatever) and that didn't happen either.
Now try joining the dots, dear kids.

Have you told them you’re going for a walk? Or just left? I only ask this as my youngest teen DD got really paranoid recently when I went out for a walk that I was never coming back 😞 I couldn’t work out where this feeling had come from - it transpired it was a joke made by a family member but I really hated the idea that she was fearful and insecure while I was gone. I’d sit down and have a serious talk with your teens. I’m a single parent so that probably is factor OP. I hope you enjoyed the park 💐