Page 4 | To think that owning your own home doesn't give you the right to be rude and entitled?

k2493 · 2024-06-20T22:17:25+00:00

AIBU to think that owning your own home doesn't give you the right to be rude and entitled? We have been having issues with our neighbours and how entitled they appear to be for years now. i.e please stop allowing your guests to park where they block our driveway. We have asked the agent but we keep getting told try to have a discussion. Well I finally had enough and politely asked must you constantly allow your guests to block our driveway? It's making our life very difficult. The response straight away was Do you own your property? Nope. Well we do. What the actual? I am genuinely confused. Does it really matter in this day and age whether you rent or own? DH says he's a twat because it should have nothing to do with money but if he wants to play that game, we pay 1.5 times more in rent than he does for his mortgage so he needs to get a life. Also I appreciate there have been some bad tenants in the past but there's a lot of us good ones and I appreciate not all home owners are this bias but surely this is bang out of order lording it over and thinking it's there god given right because they own and we don't. I work with clients needing housing all the time so I know how severe the housing shortage is at the moment. Surely anyone who is keeping a roof over there head at the moment is doing a great job mortgage, tenant or otherwise. Why do we deserve less respect because we are renting.

EnglishBluebell · 21/06/2024 09:06

Us single parents (99.99% of us did NOT choose to become single parents btw) experience the same judgement. Arguably worse as it's almost daily for me! I became a single parent as I was widowed.... I now have a partner but I still get judgement

TheaBrandt · 21/06/2024 09:10

Had this in my twenties my flatmate and I lived in a gorgeous flat in a Georgian house in a tiny cul de sac they would have street parties etc but we were never invited! And were referred to as “the renters!”. We didn’t care but still!

PoppyCherryDog · 21/06/2024 09:12

Foxblue · 21/06/2024 08:51

The mortgage comments are making me laugh, because you can very easily figure out roughly what people's mortgages are if you know either what £ or % their deposit was and roughly how old they are. Or at least, you can figure out the worst case scenario for their mortgage payments!
Price of house is available online, so you'll know roughly when they applied for the deposit and what interest rates were available at that time.
You need the deposit and the term length... done.
No, it doesn't account for the millions of variables that can get your rate up or down, but you could absolutely get a ballpark figure for most people. But it's unlikely people will tell you deposit/equity so.

Exactly you need the term and deposit amount… too massive variables that people don’t tend to share with other particularly neighbours… very hard to get a ball park figure without those things so not easy as you say

Tiredalwaystired · 21/06/2024 09:12

Foxblue · 21/06/2024 08:51

The mortgage comments are making me laugh, because you can very easily figure out roughly what people's mortgages are if you know either what £ or % their deposit was and roughly how old they are. Or at least, you can figure out the worst case scenario for their mortgage payments!
Price of house is available online, so you'll know roughly when they applied for the deposit and what interest rates were available at that time.
You need the deposit and the term length... done.
No, it doesn't account for the millions of variables that can get your rate up or down, but you could absolutely get a ballpark figure for most people. But it's unlikely people will tell you deposit/equity so.

Not necessarily. They might have remortgaged £££ for renovation works. You have no idea what that might have added to a mortgage.

EnglishBluebell · 21/06/2024 09:17

PoppyCherryDog · 21/06/2024 08:21

Yanbu they shouldn’t block your driveway.

But you have no idea what their mortgage is…

OP has just said they've told her! RTFT!!

EnglishBluebell · 21/06/2024 09:19

orangeleopard · 21/06/2024 08:22

I’m having a very similar issue. I live on a nice new build ‘estate’ where all of the houses are owned and are worth around £1m+. On this estate is two small council block of flats, we pay over £1k to the council so our rent isn’t cheap - but they treat us like crap because we’re council and they own their homes. The flats have a car park where we have allocated parking spaces. The houses don’t want to lower the status of the area by making it look ‘messy’ with cars on the road so they send their visitors to park in our car park - which means them parking in our allocated spaces. I mean when people have parties, all guests park in our car park which means none of us residents cannot park in our own spaces. I have brought it up the council and they do nothing, yet when one of the houses bring something up - the council send out a letter to state to ‘not park on the kerbs/road’. I have two allocated spaces and one car and a lot of the time cannot get one of my spaces. These houses have garage/garages AND large drives and still have the audacity to use our carpark. Yet they think because they own their homes and we’re ’just’ council that we’re beneath them.

Park behind the cars in your spaces! They'll soon learn when they can’t get their cars out!!

crackofdoom · 21/06/2024 09:24

EnglishBluebell · 21/06/2024 09:06

Us single parents (99.99% of us did NOT choose to become single parents btw) experience the same judgement. Arguably worse as it's almost daily for me! I became a single parent as I was widowed.... I now have a partner but I still get judgement

Agree.

Reugny · 21/06/2024 09:24

Where I live if you block someone's drive you can call out the parking attendants to at least get the car a ticket.

After ticketing if the vehicle is still there after about an hour it can be towed away.

There used to be a guy who used to block someone's drive weekly on the way to my DD's CM. The guy had a blue badge. I don't know whether he asked the occupants if he could park there.

Anyway he ended up getting a ticket and catching the parking attendant who told him the rules applied regardless of whether he had permission from the householder to block them in.

Sharontheodopolodous · 21/06/2024 09:25

Stripeysocks1981 · 20/06/2024 23:25

They sound like absolute wankers. Being homeowners doesn’t mean they own the fucking street. Hate people like this!

We had the exact same thing
Only they rented (council) and we own (she thought we rented)
She moved in and seemed to think it was her street and we had to live under her rules
I don't think it's because they own their house,it's because they are twats

SomePosters · 21/06/2024 09:29

Start letting their tyres down, cap off, mung bean under, cap on. 30 seconds.

its not criminal damage but it’s very inconvenient for them and they will soon learn that it’s easier to park elsewhere

Some people won’t play nice so there is no point trying to play nice with them, sadly.
I would much rather live in a world where we just be considerate of each other but what can you do?

Cattery · 21/06/2024 09:30

OnTheRightSideOfGeography · 21/06/2024 00:04

It's astonishing how many people seem to think that homeowners have more rights than those who rent. Moreover, those who also believe in an additional hierarchy of how long you've lived there, meaning that those who have been there for 40 years get first dibs on the parking, those who've only been there 15 years get the leftover scraps and the renters don't deserve anything at all.

I bet the people with these attitudes are also disproportionally nasty racists; so much so that, after they have managed to buy themselves a house in a 'naice white neighbourhood - with none of those undesirable immigrant sorts' (i.e. anybody who is non-white), they need to actively search for some other ridiculous petty 'reason' to stir up animosity based on some arbitrary characteristic that they just happen to 'win', based on their own stupid rules.

This ^

Toooldforlonghair · 21/06/2024 09:49

We own our house but in an area where at least 50% are rented. Many have LLs living in the property as the houses are ones that easily divide into flats. I came across this attitude to renters at a neighbours party when a bloke introduced me, sneeringly to his wife as:

' One of those living in those HA houses'.

All are privately owned. There are no HA houses. He had a total personality transplant when I told him this, adding truthfully I was also mortgage free, which just confirmed what a snobby git he is. His reason for assuming that the houses that we are HA tenants? All the houses in the row are the same colour!

This was to save money. Scaffolding is required for work because of the height of the houses which adds considerably to the cost. We asked our neighbour (a builder) for help when the house needed repainting. He saved us and himself money by offering to do the other houses in the terrace - hence all the same colour.

OnePeachCrow · 21/06/2024 10:01

I work in social housing. My heart absolutely sinks when I answer the phone and the caller starts by telling me they own their house because 9 times out of 10 it will be a ridiculous complaint about one of our tenants.

Livelovebehappy · 21/06/2024 10:40

EnglishBluebell · 21/06/2024 09:06

Us single parents (99.99% of us did NOT choose to become single parents btw) experience the same judgement. Arguably worse as it's almost daily for me! I became a single parent as I was widowed.... I now have a partner but I still get judgement

Try being a single parent AND private rent. The judgement is then off the scale. Happened with me before I got back on the housing ladder, and I got loads of judgement from my neighbours.

Livelovebehappy · 21/06/2024 10:42

SomePosters · 21/06/2024 09:29

Start letting their tyres down, cap off, mung bean under, cap on. 30 seconds.

its not criminal damage but it’s very inconvenient for them and they will soon learn that it’s easier to park elsewhere

Some people won’t play nice so there is no point trying to play nice with them, sadly.
I would much rather live in a world where we just be considerate of each other but what can you do?

How's this not criminal damage?

StarOf · 21/06/2024 10:46

They sound batshit crazy OP. The entitlement of them is disgraceful. People are awful regardless of whether they have a mortgage or rent, it’s just their mentality.

GasPanic · 21/06/2024 10:50

There are a lot of people out their who seem to think "renting from the bank" makes them superior to tenants.

I would just block their drive with your car. When they complain, just tell them "we're only tenants here so we don't give a shit".

poetryandwine · 21/06/2024 10:52

orangeleopard · 21/06/2024 08:22

I’m having a very similar issue. I live on a nice new build ‘estate’ where all of the houses are owned and are worth around £1m+. On this estate is two small council block of flats, we pay over £1k to the council so our rent isn’t cheap - but they treat us like crap because we’re council and they own their homes. The flats have a car park where we have allocated parking spaces. The houses don’t want to lower the status of the area by making it look ‘messy’ with cars on the road so they send their visitors to park in our car park - which means them parking in our allocated spaces. I mean when people have parties, all guests park in our car park which means none of us residents cannot park in our own spaces. I have brought it up the council and they do nothing, yet when one of the houses bring something up - the council send out a letter to state to ‘not park on the kerbs/road’. I have two allocated spaces and one car and a lot of the time cannot get one of my spaces. These houses have garage/garages AND large drives and still have the audacity to use our carpark. Yet they think because they own their homes and we’re ’just’ council that we’re beneath them.

This is awful. Can you buy bollards or something to save your parking spots when you vacate them?

You shouldn’t need to, of course. But in your shoes I think I would, if only to annoy those awful homeowners

Crikeyalmighty · 21/06/2024 11:10

Im afraid there are plenty of mumsnetters guilty of the 'just tenants' - or 'you will have to move into rental' too .

We pay a bomb to live in our very lovely 4 bed rental home in a beautiful city- could we buy? Nope, because we suddenly started earning very well at a point we were too old to get a mortgage over anything but a very short period. Could we buy elsewhere- probably yes- but not anywhere we would actually remotely want to live and we are against buyto let's. We do have other plans at what we would do further down the line-

If anyone wants to act superior to me they will get very short thrift as my rent is probably 3x their mortgage and is my 'home'

Ponoka7 · 21/06/2024 11:43

Riversideandrelax · 21/06/2024 00:07

But you still don't know what mortgage someone needed to take out?

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If you assume that they had the minimum deposit, then generally that is still lower than the rents. Which is why buy-to-lets are profitable.

Ponoka7 · 21/06/2024 11:47

PoppyCherryDog · 21/06/2024 08:31

You can’t look up what rate their mortgage is on, what term it is and what their deposit was though 😂

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Buy-to-lets are profitable because a mortgage, even at a higher rate is cheaper than the rents. Assuming a minimum deposit on 25 years, the rents are still higher. They could remortgage on a high rate and extend, but it would still be rare for the cost to exceed the rent for the equivalent house.

Justspeculating45 · 21/06/2024 11:51

The law doesn't care whether you're tenants or not, if they're obstructing your drive way, call the police.

Foxblue · 21/06/2024 11:54

Tiredalwaystired · 21/06/2024 09:12

Not necessarily. They might have remortgaged £££ for renovation works. You have no idea what that might have added to a mortgage.

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Ah yes, sorry I thought that was implied by my note about the myriad of variables!

IMustDoMoreExercise · 21/06/2024 11:54

GoneFishingToday · 21/06/2024 00:29

Next time he's openly obnoxious to you OP, I'd be inclined to remind him that a dispute with his neighbours could make it VERY difficult for him if he ever wants to sell HIS home, (he'd have to declare a dispute with his neighbours on the sale paperwork) so he might just want to think about that, before he causes you problems in the future! Ignorant pig that he is!

Really good advice. If you complain to the council about him, then he would definitely have to declare it if he sold so telling him that might change his entitled attitude.

Crikeyalmighty · 21/06/2024 12:05

@Ponoka7 not the case on my house- the mortgage would be much much higher than the rent. And for anyone buying now in a decent area needing over £250k mortgage I think many would find the same- obviously if interest rates dropped by several percent that's different - our house would be £950k approx to buy - and it's not huge.