Who should be denied cheap flight set up?

[Wayda]

My younger brother is a pilot. For 5+ years I have been lucky enough to get access to very discounted cheap flights. Appreciate that. Has helped my child and I experience many things we simply would not be able to otherwise (single mum). My brother recently mentioned that I along with our other brother need to figure out who will keep the cheap flights. Pilot brother has 5 spots which he can divvy out. He has recently become serious with a girlfriend who he wants to give the discount to.

My brother (not the pilot) is on a far higher salary than me and does not have kids. Yes, he travels more than me but that is due to him having the time to do so. This brother also loaned my younger brother some money to live off whilst training so I think feels entitled to the discounts. He probably earns £80k. Anyway, when we met at the weekend he told me “you had a good run”! The cheek! Assuming I should give up my spot.

Parents witnessed this and did not say anything about their spots. If I were them I would try and help out a single mother. I know it may seem entitled but I’m more hurt by the lack of consideration.

AIBU?

The OP has gawn I think

You sound entitled. What have you done for your brother?

Yeah. I think she thought that everyone would side with her against the evil greedy brother, and when they didn't, she scuttled off.

@Wayda Out of interest who travels the most ? . Do you only do one holiday a year? could family keeping the cheaper slots club together to pay towards your trip as they are all saving excluding the pilot brother.

Why should they? OP sounds like an entitled nightmare and it sounds as if her family are fed up with her gimme gimme gimme attitude. There was an expression on a forum which I used to frequent, which was a 'gimme pig'. Perfect description of the OP.

If OP had four kids, she'd expect to have all 5 tickets with DB & DP's missing out.

The entitlement is unreal.

Your DB didn't railroad you, it's the only fair way as you've had 5 years.

What have you done in those five years to stop being a victim OP?

Your attitude says an awful lot about your character.

Maybe if you spent less time acting entitled and more working hard you’d be on 80k. You should be grateful for the kind offer from your brother, he could easily give it to a friend instead. You can have quality time with your child at home or camping.

And then pilot DB would explain that other DB gave him money when he was getting his pilot's license, so without him he literally wouldn't have any free flights to give.

He might also say that he gave OP and the DB the choice to decide amongst them, because he didn't want to.

You are so entitled. Fancy battling over this. Man up and support your and your kid's trips. Shame.....

Are you as nasty as this in real life?

OP has one spot and her son has another. She doesn’t have two. It’s one per person.

Non-pilot brother has enjoyed cheap flights for as long as OP has. When it’s come time for one of them to lose their spot, non-pilot brother has informed OP that she’ll be losing hers and he’ll be keeping his. OP objects to this.

How does this make OP greedy, selfish and all the other horrible names she’s been called? Why is there so much hatred for single mothers on a parenting website?

Why are there ridiculous statements like ‘stop being a victim’, ‘make better choices’ and ‘you had the same life opportunities as him’ being made to a woman none of you know, and on a site that’s supposedly feminist? For all we know, the older brother is able to earn £80k because he’s abandoned a child to be looked after by a single mother who’s made that ‘life choice’.

Just because you chose to have a child it does not mean everyone else should dance around you.

The money your other brother makes is his - you are not entitled to more “free stuff” because he is successful. You are asking your other brother to subsidise your choices, and being appalled when he doesn’t want to.

It seems very generous of your pilot brother to allow you one spot. You should be grateful. You are not entitled to this, it’s a gift.

Your pilot brother probably feels really annoyed that your reaction is to be so ungrateful a) for the past 5 years b) for future use of one spot. I would be hurt if I were him. He could have given that spot to friends over the past few years and he has chosen to prioritise you and your child - you’ve had 40% of his allowance.

Your other brother is right to be annoyed. Presumably all his travel companions (friends/girlfriends) have had to pay full price for their flights while your trips have been discounted for the past 5 years.

He did not railroad you, the solution he has assumed is blindingly obvious. This behaviour is exceptionally entitled and selfish.

@PostmanPatAlwaysRingsTwice i thought op had been the main benefactor of the free flights, and non-pilot brother hadn’t had any? (Despite helping subsidising the pilot training).

OP had 2 spots and non-pilot brother had one.
Non-pilot brother wants OP to give up one spot to give to pilot brother's new girlfriend.

Hates single mothers???
The victim hood is astounding.

People are calling out the grabbiness of expecting to keep two spots instead of being grateful to having to only pay for her child.

She wants a free ride and thinks she deserves it because she's a single mum when being a single mum doesn't trump being a decent person.

After 5 years, you'd think OP would be grateful and realise she has had a good run.

The comment about reconnecting on holidays shows how out of touch she is.

This has been a bonus situation but seems OP expects to have it for life.

How are the 5 spots currently allocated? Can you keep 1, bother has 1, parents 2 (I assume that's the set up) partner of pilot gets one- you'll still get a vastly discount yes holiday if only paying for the 2 yr old. Otherwise the only solution is paper scissors rock.........

God you sound like a spoilt brat

You had a good run. Now it’s brothers turn to benefit

Your brother didn’t GIFT you the flights because you are a single parent, he gifted them because you are his sister. The other brother is a sibling too. Please note use of GIFT - there is no obligation here.

This.
Plus, when I was an airline employee, cheap tickects were only avbl to spouse and children, no other family. And was definately a priviledge which could be withdrawn for any reason, no way entitlement.
It was awkward traveling as standby, you could be stranded. Prority was usually length of service, though being a pilot trumped all that.
Nowadays, within Europe, you are probably better traveling EasyRyan.
Carefully selected flights poss no more expensive but confirmed seats.

Best you remember your good fortune of a number of years with fondness.

@PostmanPatAlwaysRingsTwice

For all we know, the older brother is able to earn £80k because he’s abandoned a child to be looked after by a single mother who’s made that ‘life choice’.

From OP post....

But my other brother is in his late 20s, no kids, no partner.

I thibk we need to understand how practically it works?

I can't think as a single parent I'd like to be at risk of standby flights and not going away. Maybe okay if you are the brother and are happy to jump on flight anywhere at moments notice.
But how do parents manage it with2 of them?
Will new girlfriend have to fly on own too?

If it works better to always have 2 spots (to guarantee 2 can go together) then rotating around the group seems best, however often that can be done.

Else no one really benefits from the gift? I'd not be hugely grateful for a perk that I could not in practice use (beyond occasional risk free weekend trips to say Paris or Dublin, that take no time off work and doesn't matter if cancelled or not)

@PostmanPatAlwaysRingsTwice Re-read the OPs posts. You have got it all completely wrong! The non-pilot brother has no children! The OP and her child have had discounted tickets for 5yrs- yes, one ticket each whilst non-pilot brother had one only. 🙄

The situation of employers is simply not comparable. Put simply, if you choose to employ someone you choose to make yourself subject to the law on maternity payments. Blatantly that is irrelevant to the situation of a sibling.

Ranking is irrelevant, as there are 5 tickets going, and people could take turns using them.