AIBU.. Reactions to walking to primary school?

[Jaggedbubble]

Due to a house move, we had a hard time getting a suitable primary school place for DS in September. Thankfully we've now managed to secure one which is 1.3 miles from our new address.

I have a car but I fully intend on walking to school with him. We currently walk to nursery which is about half the distance, and I love our walks and chats together.

The thing that has really surprised me is the amount of negative reactions from other parents about our plans to walk. 'What about in the winter! What if it's raining! They will be so exhausted!' Some of them so dramatic like I'm commiting an awful act against my DS!

We are an outdoorsy family and have plenty of warm winter gear, decent waterproofs, scooters (with pull along strap if needed) and even a bike with large seat if he's really struggling in the first term.

Also it's a big school with absolutely notorious issues for parking/ driving at school run time so I plan to avoid the stress of that! And I will still have my car if there is an emergency/illness etc, but don't plan to use it otherwise.

AIBU to be a bit miffed at everyone's reactions?

As we moved around a bit (army family) and experienced a variety of school runs, I can undoubtedly say the one we had to drive was the most stressful. (Just over two miles). It could take anywhere between 7 minutes and 45 minutes. There was the day I left to take them at 8.10am, and got back at 10.20 am due to gridlock around the school as a tunnel was out. Parking was a nightmare.

Our other commutes have been cycling 1 mile, school bus with the closest stop 1/3mile away (then they had 30 mins on the bus which they loved with their friends and school staff), and a 5 minute walk, a school taxi service (which they didn't particularly like) So much calmer.

I agree, we do have a really close school (0.2miles) which we couldn't get into. One of the families a few doors down drives! Yet you also get people further away using our street to park as its so close, I cannot understand driving from there, it must be so much extra stress for the sake of a few meters closer

If lots of the nursery mums are asking they could be sounding you out for lifts/free childcare if they think that you live further away from the school than you do. 'Of course it would be no bother picking up little Sammy because you are driving past anyway'. If not now, in a few years when they are working longer hours.

This. Why are you annnouncing you're going to walk like it's an irrecoverable decision. You can walk most of the time and still drive sometimes if it's raining or you're going straight off to work after. No big deal.

On the other hand if you don't work then 2.6 mile walk twice a day will be great for your health!

Ooh I hadn't thought of that.
I'll consider that going forwards, thank you!

It will be fine. As for rain, children are not the wicked witch of the west, they won't melt.

I walked with DD for most of the time when she was at primary school, a 15 minute walk away. The funniest thing was how many other parents stopped on their way and offered us a lift. I was always….”thanks but we actually chose to walk.”

One if dd1's friends is probably about that distance from school, they've always walked. In Reception though her Mum did still bring the pushchair/bike trailer because she couldn't always make it home so it might be worth considering that kind of backup for the first few weeks until you've got a better idea of how tired he is.

I don't think many parents have that sort of time to be spending on the school run. Young children walk slowly, so the walk there, wait for the teacher, turn around and walk home would probably take me about an hour. Not to mention most parents are heading to work after so need the car.

We do walk because it's close, and I really like it, but I think we'd be struggling if it was over a mile which is a shame as I like walking and hate driving.

If you've been talking about the horrors of driving to school to people who will be driving for whatever reason, maybe you've gotten people's backs up.

We don't have a car so always walked to primary school (only about half a mile, nice walk involving a park and a path only open to pedestrians, so more or less as the crow flies). As we set off I often saw a young, slim, healthy-looking woman up the road (so a bit nearer the school than us) loading her children into her people carrier. By the time she'd done that, driven round (she couldn't go as the crow flies and there would have been heavy traffic, so not that quick), found a place to park and got them all out again, we were already in the playground. I would then see her pulling up back outside her house as I walked home, so it's not as if she was driving on to work or the supermarket. It would have been far easier for her to walk and better for the children. (Yes, I know there could have been an invisible health condition affecting her or one of the children. From what I knew of her, though, I doubt it. She was just wedded to her car.)

Similar to another woman I met when my daughter was a baby. We were at an NCT coffee morning in a house at one end of a residential road, maybe half a mile long. I asked her where she lived and it turned out she lived at the other end of the road. 'Oh nice', I said 'Just a short walk for you, then.' 'Oh no, I drove', she said. 'I worry about the fumes from exhaust pipes if he's in the pushchair on the pavement, he's on their level'. I always wish I'd said 'I see - other people's exhaust fumes are a problem for your son, but your totally unnecessary exhaust fumes are not an issue for my daughter?' I didn't, though. Maybe it was a PFB phase.

Sounds like an excellent reason to carry on walking! Reciprocal arrangements like that have the potential to go badly wrong, if MN is anything to go by.

I was thinking similar. Most parents at my kids school need to work and don't have what would realistically be the better part of 90mins to 2 hours every day to piss about walking to and from school.

I do walk my kids to school BTW cos it is a ten minute round trip.

People are so odd about walking.

I went for a health check recently and as it was a nice day, rather than change tubes I got off at the nearest stop on my tube line and walked the 30 mins to the clinic as it was a nice sunny day.

The doctor who was assessing me reacted like I had run a marathon when I told her.

For us it would be the time factor that means that distance wouldn't be ideal. We moved house so we could be a short walk to our dc's primary school - it's a 5 min walk now. I love being a short walk away - I've sometimes had to pop back again within an hour for an assembly or meeting, and with 2 dcs I sometimes have 2 pickups when one child has an enrichment club or trip, so going back and forth multiple times is much easier when it's a 10 min round trip. It also means dc can get to lots of extracurriculars and play dates locally or just hang out in the park and have a quick walk home in time for dinner. It's also a short round trip for me and means I have more time to get on with things during the school day.

You might want to make a habit of bringing the scooter with strap every day at pick up. Reception can be really tiring for 4 and 5yos. Mine used to fall asleep in the bike trailer on the way home sometimes.

Lots of people are fatter and lazier now.

I highly doubt it's that, don't be so cynical. They're just a bit surprised you're planning on walking a distance that they wouldn't for whatever reason (time, children's energy levels, just don't want to). It is longer than the norm these days so I don't know why you're so shocked.

If there's judgement in your tone in these conversations people will be backing away, so be careful. Everyone does what suits them best and isn't that great.

Surely the reason many people are driving is they are heading to work immediately after so don't have the time to walk half an hour home again to grab the car and then set off again?

And lots of people have two parents in the house who work (or single working parent) so they don't have time to walk that distance and back twice a day.

Lots of people are just lazy.

We walk (or scoot, or bike) about a mile to nursery. A family down the road does the same journey going literally two stops on the bus.

No physical difficulties (I know them well enough to know), they just don’t move more than they have to.

My dcs did that walk from reception to year 2. Apparently I was 'brave' to do that (undertone 'mean').

I now live a 10 min walk from school which I admit is amazing (I didn't mind the rainy/cold walks too much it was the 30+ degree days that killed us). 3 parents on my street drive to school then drive straight home. I mostly wfh and usually beat them both ways as parking is awful at the school.

@NerrSnerr yes same in our household but lots of people drive unnecessarily too. People are lazier in general

Well such a conversation could have happed as part of the 'where are you moving to?' conversation. Where are the children going to school? Oh, that's quite a way away, etc.

My daughter walks that distance to secondary school each day. It's fine, it's good for her. She walks in all weathers but if it's really atrocious (torrential rain and gales, for example) I'll give her a lift. This has probably happened about 6 times in 2 years. You have to use your common sense.

I feel like I've got some people's backs up with the 'anti driving' thing. I absolutely don't have an issue with people driving to school. Everyone does what works in their circumstances.

I work from home part time so I recognise having the time to walk is a privilege that not everyone has. I'm not trying to start an argument against cars, I love my car!
I was just surprised how much negativity I've received, not even blatant always, just comments such as the above like 'brave' or 'interesting' or 'you'll change your mind come winter..' etc.

I'm all for each doing what suits them best! Just a bit miffed at some reactions is all. It's nice to read others positive experiences from walking the school run, thank you for those.