To think that an Irish funeral is a bit different to an English funeral?

[MargoLivebetter]

I'm looking for a bit of guidance, as I think that an Irish funeral will be different to an English Funeral and I obviously only have 2 days to prepare! My partner has been as much use as a chocolate teapot with clothing advice.

Firstly, this is a Catholic funeral for an elderly person, not someone who passed away at a young age or in tragic circumstances. They were in their 90s and had a long and well-lived life and died peacefully after a short illness. In England, from the funerals I've been too that are of similar types deaths, this would be seen as a celebration of that person's life and whilst it is unlikely that people would be wearing pink or red, it is unlikely that they'd all be in black.

I was chatting to an Irish work colleague this morning and she said that funerals in Ireland were much more traditional, particularly those in the countryside and that I should be looking to wear black, or navy at the very least.

So, firstly checking in with Irish Mumsnetters to see if this is the case? Secondly, if it is, I am thinking of wearing a black dress with small white polka dots and a black jacket and flat shoes for the inevitable standing around. The dress is a shirt dress, so modest, not clingy. Does this sound appropriate? I don't really want to have to buy an entirely black dress that I'll probably never wear again. I also don't want to be the clueless English fool who isn't showing proper respect.

I know it will be a wake with an open coffin, but I've done one of those here in the UK, so I'm prepared for that.

Anything else that are likely to be stand out differences?

Thank you.

I’m Irish. There can be big differences between city and rural funerals.
I’m in Dublin and over the past few years I’ve been to more short services in crematoriums than funeral masses in a church. Short humanist ceremonies are becoming more popular. Haven’t had a Rosary for years!
It’s also not uncommon for families to prefer greeting people at a room in a funeral home than having an open coffin at a wake in their home.

It’s different in rural areas where every man and his dog will turn up for some grub at the wake.

Can't thank you all enough for the advice. The funeral was definitely different to anything I've been to in the UK, but I felt well briefed and could recognise the various aspects from what you had all told me. We had the wake at home with an open casket, the full closing of the coffin ceremony and removal with members of the family carrying the coffin. I don't know if the morticians in Ireland have different techniques to those in the UK, but the dead people I've seen laid out in the UK look like they are asleep. DP's Uncle looked very dead, iyswim.

I was very grateful for the tip about everyone lining up to say "Sorry for your troubles" in the church, otherwise I'd have wondered if they'd all got lost or something. Never seen that in my life before.

In the end, I wore the same dress for the wake and the funeral, as I just couldn't hack trying to squeeze another outfit into my tiny bag. It was fine and although I was possibly a smidge over-dressed for the wake, it didn't matter.

It was a tremendous event, despite it being a funeral. A true recognition of a life well lived. I've no idea how such a thing is organised in 3 days!!!! Definitely way more religious than anything in the UK (more rosaries than I've said since I was a tiny tot), but I'd say that had more to do with the age and beliefs of the individual than anything else.

Glad it went well. It’s intense which is why I think we do it all so quickly… any longer than a few days would be exhausting! I find the long drawn out time between death and burial here in England very odd,
friends Ddad wasn’t buried for a full 3 weeks… such a long time to wait to say goodbye and celebrate a life .