to think the ageism on here has been disgusting recently

[EverythingYouDoIsaBalloon]

Distaste for the idea of older mothers. Pesky pensioners daring to shop at weekends when they've 'got all week' to do it. Retirement-age people being lambasted for not resigning to free up jobs for younger people. A lack of comprehension as to why older people are even in the workplace at all. Calls for over-80s to be stripped of their driving licences. A solemn assertion from one pp earlier in the year that '60 isn't young. It's old.' like middle age doesn't even exist. And that’s just off the top of my head.

Some people are going to get a shock when they get older themselves, according to some of the comments I’ve seen on this forum recently.

It's up to the woman.
We should have control of our own bodies.
A 40 year old woman is no more likely to be a bad mother than a 30 year old one.

It goes both ways though sadly. Similar amounts of vitriol are rained down on Millennials and Gen Z from older generations!

Different generations can often have very different needs, views, lifestyles and politics, so tend to disagree and view each other with suspicion.

And regardless of age, people also want to claim their way of doing things is right/valuable. It’s a self-preservation thing.

What threads are they? What's the equivalent offensive term for them, like "boomer"?

I have never seen a comment like that to women in their late 30s.

Meanwhile the comments to young women are really unkind and sometimes quite vicious. And of course, nobody calls it out.

If you're a young parent:

You're a child yourself, you can't possibly have an education or career, have any kind of social life or hobbies, your life sucks. You'll probably be split up from your partner in a few years. Wasting your life with sick and nappies, not travelling and partying like you should be, bla bla bla.

If your life doesn't suck, you're a cheeky fucker who must have exploited the state or grandparents. Even if you plan to travel in your 30s and 40s, it's just not the same. You'll never be good enough.

I mean, even if there are mean violent to older mums, it's a lot more likely to be coming from smug people in their 30s. As much as the above comments piss me off, I'm not going to be derogatory to older mums because I know how it feels.

Also different "generations" don't automatically disagree. It varies person to person.

I can only think of one of my friends from school who's mum worked, while we were at primary school anyway. Most of them went back to work once we were older.

Just asked DH and he said all his friends mum's were SAHMs that he can recall. There were a couple of kids he knew who's mum's worked but it wasn't the norm in his circles.

We can all only go on our experiences.

Similar amounts of vitriol are rained down on Millennials and Gen Z from older generations!

There is some animosity between generations, of course, but it is certainly not "similar amounts" directed by older generations. This kind of whataboutery is just another example of ageism.

Regarding Brexit as it was such a close call we would have almost certainly remained if all the young people who couldn't be bothered to vote had actually done so as I'm pretty sure most of them would have wanted to remain. Statistically older voters are more likely to actually vote.

Midold aged? Mould aged?

But the accident is far more likely to result in a death with young drivers than 80yos… so should we stop young people driving?

I think it's crazy to be upset about Brexit if you never bothered to vote.

I must admit I've been surprised by the extent of the negativity towards older people on MN. A significant enough number of posters that I've noted it as a thing, seem absolutely furious with them, blaming them for all the ills of society. Still others appear to despise them, which ranges from spiteful comments about what older women should wear, to viscious glee at besting their MiLs.
My theory is its the demographic, which is largely people who are no longer young themselves; and some are starting to panic a bit about their own aging and mortality. Framing even older people as something to be despised, mocked and scorned is a way of othering them and distancing from them lest anyone think they may be becoming them. Its also fear, because we all know we're going the same way, and we hate what we fear.

What makes you think all the non voting youth wanted to remain?

@paasll Can you share where you got the info that it was the fault of the over 80 drivers? Also looking forward to the stats that prove the young drivers weren't at fault. This is known as cherry picking, and your factual speaking is still ageism.

Goodness me.

1. It’s not whataboutery if I’m pointing it out as an unfortunate fact that develops on, rather than contests, the original point.
2. I’ll admit I don’t have access to the precise amounts and should have said “similarly, the older generation do this to the young and the things they say are no less unpleasant” …
3. You don’t have access to the amounts of vitriol either (nobody does)
4. Your statement that pointing out that generational animosity more broadly exists is a form of ageism makes no sense.

Yes, I would prefer people who are not safe to drive not to drive, even if that means they lose independence.

Unsafe drivers put everyone else on the roads at risk.

" A solemn assertion from one pp earlier in the year that '60 isn't young. It's old.' like middle age doesn't even exist."

Oh dear. Just because middle age exists doesn't mean old age doesn't also exist. For me, middle age is 40 to 60 so yes from 60 a person is old. It was a woman's retirement age when I was growing up. I understand that people's health is generally better these days and we may feel old a little later, but it's not ageist to admit that old age exists!

🙄

"Distaste for the idea of older mothers."

I think this depends on how old? If someone is having a child post menopause age with another woman's egg it's a totally different thing to having a child at 35. What ages have people been showing 'distaste' for?

Right, but they're not unsafe owing to them choosing to not drive far in the first place. So you'd rather myself and DH use up our holiday allowance at work taking them places? They're eventually going to be unable to look after themselves and be put in a home. Unless you'd rather they live with us in our tiny house?

I’m referring to the general discourses of disdain directed at Millennials and Gen Z, which crop up on threads and in the world, rather than having specific threads in mind.

E.g.
Younger generations can’t save for a deposit because of Netflix and avocado toast / they expect everything handed to them / are selfish and materialistic / don’t want to work / don’t know hardship like we did …

People of any age can be guilty of ageism. It’s just another form of tribalism and stereotyping. People can be so drawn to stereotypes because the world is so confusing and complex without them. But of course they’re insufficient and reductive.

I suppose it’s not surprising that older people don’t feel valued in a capitalist society where advertising fetishises youth and sex, and a person’s value is also closely equated with wealth, health and vigorous activity (look at the hatred for “benefit scroungers”, the disabled, and so many other groups).

Where does Gen X fit into these debates? Always wondered what ills we are blamed for.

What amuses me (not in the 60 plus age bracket myself btw), is how younger people froth at the mouth because they think retirees are taking money off them by getting paid a pension. A lot of these comments are due to ignorance that actually pensioners have paid into the system for 40 plus years, and have ‘earnst’ their pension, just like the young people will have done when it’s their turn. Problem is, lazy ineffective parenting is producing people who don’t want to work, for whatever reason, and don’t possess any life skills, so obviously when these young mums reach pensionable age, the pot might be empty. But that’s not our problem. You reap what you sow and all that….

Yes, I think it's actually ageist of the OP to claim that being told that a 60 year old is old is offensive and I think it ultimately comes from a fear of dying.

It's knowing they'll feel very differently when it's their turn that stops me taking such sentiments seriously