Would you let your child do this or am I over the top?

[KrustyBurger]

Currently on holiday in the USA. We are staying at a Marriott so not a motel type set up.

Husband asked our daughter who is 12 to run some rubbish down to the bin next to the lift, she would have to go past about 12 room doors (6 each side).

I said no, il do it as you never know who’s in the rooms and it only takes 5 seconds for someone to open the door and yank her in and you wouldn’t even know which room it is or where she is.

Husband said ok but gave me a strange glance.

Was I being over the top? Or would other parents do the same. It’s nearly 10pm at night here.

Husband's a bit of a clean freak and our bin is full hence not just leaving it.

Why do you think she is in more danger of being abducted while walking past six hotel rooms in a hotel in America than she would be while getting a bus or going to the shops in the UK, though?

You're being really irrational about this.

my eldest is 17 I am well aware of how to help them navigate life and have alerted them to all sorts of risks that they need to know about. Believe me my DS is super confident, very laidback and nowhere near the image of a gibbering wreck that some on here would like to believe.

The odds of winning the Lottery are about 1 in 4 million - but huge numbers of people still play it because we don't live our lives by statistics. I always lock my room door when I stay in a hotel - am I being irrational?

I'd go with her! If we are anywhere foreign, on vacation, whatever, I don't like letting my kids out of my sight & they are 17 & 12! Even in the grocery store, I hate it when they flit off to another aisle.

It literally only takes a split second (for the worst to happen).

Because she’s on holiday, clearly.

and yes it was approved by the school. Not that either point it relevant to the thread.

My children are younger than that, but we have been working on skills needed for age-appropriate independence since they were small. The statement that in a few years they would be crying because they can't find their way back from toilets is therefore utterly ridiculous. I can imagine this happening to a child who has until then been under constant supervision though - of course you panic if mummy has been always there every step you take.

A troll, I have been on here for years! A bit rude- I didn’t say I wouldn’t go camping where single people go but a) I wouldn’t go camping in the first place as I don’t have a tent or equipment and b) if it is not a family campsite the dynamics may be different, more rowdy behaviour, more drinking, more merriment that isn’t really appropriate for kids. I’m not sure how that fits the description of the clinically insane, it is a practical approach.

Marriott is fairly nice… I assume all corridors have cctv? I mean worse case scenario you can start banging on one of those 12 doors?!
As long as you trust her to come straight back I don’t see a problem.

I stayed at a similar chain with my 2 year old in the USA who thought it was funny to keep opening the door and run down the hall to the lifts. I can assure you nobody grabbed him…
Usually housekeeping are around. Nobody is going to be waiting at the door expecting your daughter to walk alone down the hallway, or be able to grab her in time physically. Sorry I think you are being delusional. She is probably safer walking down the hallway in this hotel than at some places in the UK… I am sure most people are on holiday to enjoy themselves and not planning to kidnap anyone.

You've witnessed 12 year olds crying because they couldn't find a toilet in a bar and being escorted back to their parents by strangers?!?!?!?!

Hahahahahahaha!!!! I am actually crying 😂That is the best post on here today by a mile 😂

In other news, my 12 year old DSD is off into Manchester for the day on Saturday with her best friend to go shopping for holiday clothes.

I despair of people saying if parents keep an eye on young children 24/7 on holiday the children are destined to become anxiety ridden adults with no confidence. I can assure you I was never out of sight of my parents when on holidays & I am the total opposite. I say let your young children go off on their own on holiday as much as you wish, or walk alone at night down dark lanes. I say that's dangerous.

At 12 I had free reign in hotels, going to the pool on my own, to the cafe or lounge. I had siblings, younger and older and we all did what we wanted as long as we turned up for meals. It’s ridiculous to keep a 12 year old in the room because you are scared something is going to happen. I wonder if OP would treat a 12 year old boy differently.

How far from Manchester are you? My DD goes to the shops in a City but we are a 30 min walk from it and 10 mins bus journey, 5 mins train as live next to a station but I wouldn’t let her go to London yet which is an hour by train as too young and I don’t know anyone that would. Dd is nearly 13.

Yes I’d let my DD leave a hotel room to go down a corridor alone

If I was that frightened of being somewhere I probably just wouldn’t go in the first place

Actually my mum is petrified of this and reminds me every time we take dcs to a hotel.

She claims there was a case/ cases in the 70’s of 80’s where exactly this happened.

I tend not to worry too much simply because if I worry about everything my brain gets overloaded by fears; but in op’s defence it’s by no means the first time have heard of this and, as I say, my mum is convinced it is backed up by incident.
So I’m voting YANBU op. After all, you’d feel pretty stupid if you’d worried, done nothing and then it happened.

I agree and I used to have a friend when I was around 17 that wished her Mum gave as much concern for my well-being as mine did. My Dad was the opposite and dismissive about my Mum being overprotective and in all honesty I wouldn’t want the father of my children to be so flippant about it - it did sometimes feel like he didn’t care.

Her well-being obviously not mine.

I'm not even sure what their argument is any more

They seem to just want to keep arguing and change their point to maintain their argument

How have I changed my point? I don’t agree with you stop referencing me and get over it!

Woke up to lots of very angry posters arguing. Didn’t think it would get so many replies and I didn’t realise so many people would be so angry about it. 😂

Going to a well known city with a friend is totally different to being lost in a bar with multiple floors, loud music & filled with people drinking, especially when staff are speaking a foreign language. Laugh away, I'll accompany them at 10/12 thanks.

Says the poster who has jumped on another poster for making a point that wasn't even directed to them 🤣

Can I ask OP, would you let your child do this task in a hotel here in the UK?

That’s what Mn is op!

My mum would think you were a rare specimen of parental responsibility . She’s certain the hotel kidnappings are a thing.

I have not known her to be neurotic or make things up so I’m guessing it is.

I'm not angry, I just want to know if your husband does have a unique set of skills, just in case you need it.