Page 5 | Shorter maternity leave???

Sausagedog101 · 2024-06-11T15:19:47+00:00

Has anyone here taken a shorter mat leave (less than a year)??? I am taking 8 months which is the right decision for us as a family (my MH is in tatters and work help keeps it at bay!) but I get a lot of surprised/shocked comments from people who say they can't believe I'm not taking the year, or people saying I'm not making the most of the 'full allowance'. I would argue quality over quantity is more important but I am feeling abnormal for wanting/needing to work when everyone seems to love mat leave and never want to go back. I keep busy with my boys and always out and about but my mind craves stimulation or else I end up in a dark place. Anyone else???

Original poster

Sausagedog101 · 12/06/2024 21:31

MollyRover · 12/06/2024 21:27

@Sausagedog101 where I am there is additional 6 months of unpaid parental leave for each parent which can be taken up until your child is 8 without affecting pension contributions. Most people use it to work reduced hours until it runs out. Minimizes loss of earnings if you're only taking a few hours a week and means that there's a more equal split in parenting too. Childcare is also so expensive and difficult to access that it's a huge incentive to use it. I don't know anyone who hasn't used it to be honest.

I wish we had something similar in the UK! There's a lot of focus on the first year with a baby, but it would be nice to have the option to spread leave more evenly across the early years.

We can take unpaid parental leave - 18 weeks per child until child turns 18, but I don't know many people who take this. It is also unpaid and generally capped at 1 month at a time. I will use it though for settling in primary school etc and am fortunate to be able to.

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Original poster

Sausagedog101 · 12/06/2024 21:33

DrinkFeckArseBrick · 12/06/2024 21:30

Frist time 10 months second time 13.

Remember you are entitled to unpaid parental leave of up to a year any time your kid is up to 18. If you ever want some more time with your kids (when they are older and more fun, or if you want to travel or something) then it's still possible.

Also remember your baby won't even remember

Thank you! I wish it was a year but I think it is 18 weeks in the UK.

Out of interest, Was there a reason you took longer second time around?

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Hotpolarbear · 12/06/2024 21:34

My lb was born in feb. Il probably end up going back in September as cant aftord to be off any longer. I worked right up until my due date to maximise my time off after

MyOtherHusbandIsAWash · 12/06/2024 21:37

I took 6 months for both-I earn much more than my husband so we couldn’t afford for me to take more. Thankfully no one made such a shitty comment to me regarding not taking the full year-they’d have been put well in their place for multiple reasons! First time I was so ready to go back, this time (back in 2 weeks) I have mixed feelings and would have liked a little longer with him. Length of leave is based on all manner of reasons for different folk, so just make the best decision for your family and then tell anyone trying to make you feel bad (whether intentional or not) to jog on.

Original poster

Sausagedog101 · 12/06/2024 21:42

MyOtherHusbandIsAWash · 12/06/2024 21:37

I took 6 months for both-I earn much more than my husband so we couldn’t afford for me to take more. Thankfully no one made such a shitty comment to me regarding not taking the full year-they’d have been put well in their place for multiple reasons! First time I was so ready to go back, this time (back in 2 weeks) I have mixed feelings and would have liked a little longer with him. Length of leave is based on all manner of reasons for different folk, so just make the best decision for your family and then tell anyone trying to make you feel bad (whether intentional or not) to jog on.

Thank you for the wise words!! I need to take a leaf out of your book and be stronger in my decisions & not let the opinions of others get to me.

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DrinkFeckArseBrick · 12/06/2024 22:03

I went back earlier the first time as I was worried about the effect on my career. The second time, I didn't have that worry, and my baby didn't sleep. They wouldn't take a bottle and woke up every 90 min, I couldn't do anything let alone work. When we sleep trained about 7 or 8 months the feeding dropped from about 12 times a day to 3 or 4 and it did something crazy to my hormones and I had awful headaches for about 3 months. So I went back a bit later as I felt like I'd been in limbo for months and months and not actually done anything on mat leave. Then my husband took a month unpaid (bit of a random reason but there was a large measles outbreak in our area at the time and we wanted to wait for the 13 month vaccinations before sending them to nursery).

Boymum2104 · 12/06/2024 22:39

I've just taken 14 months off. Personally I just thought I'll never get this time back so take as long as possible. But it's a completely personal choice and theres many factors involved. As long as you're confident & happy in your decision

Original poster

Sausagedog101 · 12/06/2024 22:58

Boymum2104 · 12/06/2024 22:39

I've just taken 14 months off. Personally I just thought I'll never get this time back so take as long as possible. But it's a completely personal choice and theres many factors involved. As long as you're confident & happy in your decision

It totally is a personal choice isn't it, and every individual situation is different. For me personally, I want to enjoy the time I do have so would rather take less time to make sure this is the case. But I know everyone is different!

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