Shorter maternity leave???

[Sausagedog101]

Has anyone here taken a shorter mat leave (less than a year)???

I am taking 8 months which is the right decision for us as a family (my MH is in tatters and work help keeps it at bay!) but I get a lot of surprised/shocked comments from people who say they can't believe I'm not taking the year, or people saying I'm not making the most of the 'full allowance'.

I would argue quality over quantity is more important but I am feeling abnormal for wanting/needing to work when everyone seems to love mat leave and never want to go back. I keep busy with my boys and always out and about but my mind craves stimulation or else I end up in a dark place.

Anyone else???

I'm a childminder so I took 2 weeks with my 2nd baby and 3 days with my 3rd and 4th but obviously wasn't leave my baby so a little different. I did have a mum come to me with a 3 month old and she was just desperate to get vsck to work to see if her pnd would lift and it did. Made such a difference for her to be able to be away from her little one for several hours and then come back- tiny babies are lovely but hard work!

I took 6 months + one month leave. Would have liked longer, but not financially feasible.

However I do enjoy work too.

I used some leave to take off a day a week for a couple of months. Would love to do that more permanently as I really treasures that midweek break and baby/ kid day.

Loads of people only take 9 months, if they can't afford to have the unpaid portion.

I took 8 months with DD1 and 7 with DD2. I wanted to go back to work, being home with small children does not suit me. I had severe PND both times.

Is this your first?

I didn't want to go back sooner than a year

I’m currently pregnant and will be taking 39 weeks in total as that is when my SMP runs out. I have about 6 months of full pay before that but we can’t afford for me to have no money at all coming in. I’m fully expecting certain people in my family to do that whole wide eyed “but how can you leave your precious baby?!” bollocks routine but they will be told to stop being daft.

I took 9 months, 6 months full pay, 3 months half pay, anything after that would've been unpaid.
But as I work remote it was easier for me to go
Back to work, I didn't need to put my baby in nursery either as I had family helping out.
One of my colleagues took 6 months maternity leave

I went back at 6 months and then my husband did 3. That was actually not the best financial decision but it was best for us a family. I’m not cut out for babies. If I could have a year out now he’s four I’d much prefer that!

First baby I took 4.5 months off. It's all we could afford. Basically once my full pay ran out and I'd used up a chunk of annual leave I had to go back.

Second baby I took 5.5 months then my husband took another 2.5 months (I'm the higher earner). I then had enough annual leave to take a day off a week until she was a year old.

It was tough but no regrets. If they get settled early enough at nursery they don't get separation anxiety.

This is my second. I took a year with my first and it was personally too long for me and my MH took a battering.

What a spiteful comment.

We took 6 months each (me the first 6 months obviously!). I was bored to tears and loved being back at work, though I do largely work from home. Really recommend shared leave for having a fully involved DH from the start. I earn 75% of our household income and I see my kids plenty - doing most drop offs and pick ups. A lot of the negative comments you will receive are from people stuck in the 1950s. In the 1980s my mum took 6 weeks!

Feeling similar. Can't really explain why I'm struggling at home but it's similar to how I felt during pandemic / furlough. Financially we planned for me to take the max (12 months then A/L) but i have just decided today to go back earlier. Most people are shocked and I feel guilty like I should want to spend as much time as possible with my baby. But I think going back to work will mean I will be happier and therefore a better mum.

I was a c/ minder . I had children from 6 weeks , 3 months , 6 months … everyone was different .

One thing I have noticed since having a child , people seem to feel a need to share their opinions on what I do ..

you have to learn to ignore them - you do what works for you and your family.

I am sorry you are struggling too.

I understand what you say about being happier and a better mum. But I also understand the guilt component.

I tell myself too that if I am not happy then I won't be 'maximising the time' as much as possible, for both myself and my son. I will maximise the time when I am happier and in turn a better parent.

If you don't mind me asking; how long will you be taking? Wishing you all the best!

I took 3 months, which was all I could afford. Do lots of people take a year? I am surprised people can afford to

I took a year but my maternity leave ended at six months. I had to take a combination of other paid leave.

I’m one and done. I am happy to have had the time. I feel though at 8 months I could have gone back to work.

I’m back part-time. I like the balance of being a mum and working.

I returned to work after 8 months and got loads of comments about it. I clearly wasn't very happy to be back (had to go back for financial reasons) but people still went on about it! I don't think they realised how bad it made me feel! People make comments without really thinking about it 🙄

How long did your DH take off work- did he not also raise your children?

Yes, this!

'Oh not taking the year? I want to make the most of the time I have so will be taking the year....'

Guilt inducing!

Thankfully many posters here have stated that they only get the statutory minimum. Seems only on MN that so many have T&Cs that exceed that. You do what feels right for you OP even though you might have better than minimum MT rights.

I'm sure many stat-min ML mothers/parents would like to have more choice but don't have that option.

Some interesting stats about rates of maternity pay here

https://www.cipd.org/globalassets/media/knowledge/knowledge-hub/reports/employer-focus-on-working-parents-report_tcm18-111075.pdf

Sorry but what does MT stand for?

Meeee. I took 6.5 months off. Due to a combination of financial pressure and being offered a role l couldn’t say no to. In hindsight my mental health improved after going back so it was the right move. But like a lot of parenting then it’s a personal thing. I however still cringe at the former friend who took the whole year, then annual leave and then “sick” (she didn’t feel like going back -does anyone?!). So was off for 15 months for both of her children

I'm self employed and will likely be taking about 6-8 weeks off then I'll be working again. Idk how anyone can afford to live on statutory maternity pay

I absolutely love being at home with my baby, she's delightful, but I took 10 months off as any longer would have been tricky financially, being the slightly higher wage earner.