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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

We don't like the same food - AIBU?

104 replies

Teenagehorrorbag · 04/06/2024 20:35

DH likes gravy dinners. He likes potatoes and veg, with a piece of meat or fish. A Sunday roast is his favourite. He also likes steak/sausages/gammon and chips once a week or so. (As do I.....)

He will eat anything - and does occasionally eat pasta (preferably lasagne, ideally with chips and peas). Rice is OK with curry, and he does actually like that from time to time. He also enjoys a chinese takeaway. But he's really not keen on any other sort of pasta, stir fries, noodles, etc or anything 'mixed up'. (Though he eats stew, chilli - with chunky beef - and even soup)!

I prefer things like lasagne, spag bol, mince and spuds, corned beef hash, pasta bake, risotto, shepherds pie etc. But do also enjoy gravy dinners from to time, but not 7 nights a week.

My teenage kids eat and enjoy anything, pretty much.

DH never cooks or prepares food - he says he can't (Mummy's boy). Mid 50s - he's not going to change. I hate cooking and meal planning but accepted that was my role when we got together - but never dreamt how fussy he would be.

Today I couldn't think of anything so made a tuna pasta bake. It had onions, peppers and sweetcorn so contained protein, carbs, dairy and veg. He moaned and moaned and stared at it, pushing it round his plate, for ages. The kids loved it and had seconds. He kept saying it was for people who had no teeth and nobody eats food like that. Just so rude - he really pissed me off and I did get quite angry! He had steak pie with spuds and veg and gravy last night, so I don't think I'm unreasonable doing something the rest of us like today. He's not allergic to anything and doesn't hate any of the ingredients as such - just that it's not really his preferred sort of food.

Please tell me most people (including those with penises) do eat pasta bakes, stir fries, and similar. He's convinced I'm weird.......

OP posts:
Wotcher · 05/06/2024 12:41

Got to be honest, I’m not a big pasta fan. It’s boring, doesn’t taste very good and I don’t like tomato based sauces, they do nothing for me whatsoever. I don’t mind creamy pasta as much, but it’s unhealthy so I don’t bother. I’m also not a huge fan of your general list either, with the exception of stir fry.

BUT…. if you’re cooking for him every day, and you mix it up with other stuff then he can suck it up and bloody eat it.

My ex was a bit of a pasta fan, and would make bolognese, lasagna or pasta dishes sometimes and I’d just eat them. The only time I might feel really down about it was when he’d buy the ravioli style stuffed fresh pasta pieces with a tub of fresh sauce. I still ate it, but was always disappointed having to have it as I never enjoyed it.

But yeah. He can cook it himself the lazy shit. I could not, and would not, be with a man-child that cannot do things for himself. I couldn’t love someone like that. ESPECIALLY if they were not even grateful for me looking after them like their mummy!

Pigeonqueen · 05/06/2024 12:42

Are we married to the same man? 😳🤣

Also been married 15 years. I’ve given up listening to the moaning. I just ignore him completely. He’s got to the point now where he doesn’t moan as much, he’ll just not eat things and then chucks what he doesn’t want. I just make sure everyone has a mix of meals they do like and if they don’t like some things it’s just tough shit.

Spudthespanner · 05/06/2024 16:42

Your husband is a legitimate freak. What 50 year old man behaves like this?

Teenagehorrorbag · 05/06/2024 22:49

KarenOH · 05/06/2024 11:52

The no cooking thing wouldnt bother me if he pulled weight elsewhere.

The having food preferences wouldnt bother me - sometimes DH makes something that isnt to my taste, so il just make myself something on toast,

But to not cook and THEN criticise in such a childish and rude way? Absolutely fucking not. How bloody dare he!

Exactly! He does pull his weight elsewhere but he really needs to learn some manners where food is concerned. He was so rude - and I have just escaped to my study tonight because he started on again! He does have a few good points but I'm struggling to remember them right now.......

The kids really enjoyed it, and argued tonight over who would get the leftovers.

I get some people don't like some foods - but a polite "not sure that was my favourite, please could I have something else if you do it again?" would suffice? Not the pathetic (and massively rude) poking food around his plate and whinging....

I really want to stop feeding him but he is such a dinosaur he genuinely thinks that women should look after their men. (Blame his 97 year old mother who is the worst ever role model....) I did cook when we first bought this house because he spent every waking hour doing the renovations. But now it's done he just does whatever he likes, and I've set some sort of stupid precedent....

Seriously contemplating LTB. The kids would be sad but I can't face this for the next 40 years...........

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