Who is wrong here?

[PyongyangKipperbang]

Person A. Random bad bout of motion sickness, not happened in this grown adult since childhood. Clearly very ill. Difficult journey so sickness ends up a full blown panic attack with intermittent heaving but contained with plastic bags and wet wipes, and Person A doesnt want to keep stoppinng to be sick every 5 to ten minutes. But speed is increasing the panic and keeps insisting that Person B slows down.

Person B is being very patient. Offers to stop, stops to try and buy remedies, opens windows etc. Does everything they can. They are driving will below the legal limit, so say 40 in a 60. This is slower than they would normally drive and they are making an effort to do slower braking and accelerating than they would normally do, but Person A is still asking them to slow down.

Person A says Person B should have slowed down further as it was a quiet road and maybe pulled in to let traffic pass if there was a queue.

Person B says that they were not driving fast and dont agree that they should have slowed down more on single lane roads.

The reason it was a difficult drive was that person A has a fear of heights and there was an unexpected (to A) climb up a very steep mountain road with high drops. Person B has driven this route many times, enjoys the drive and didnt think to mention the drops as didnt know that Person A was scared of heights.

Team B. Driving too far under the speed limit unless road conditions call for it, is dangerous driving.

It's actually a driving offence to drive too slowly because it can be dangerous. Even repeatedly pulling over isn't safe driving. Neither person is wrong, but B was definitely right to not go slower than 20 below the speed limit.

Simple person A was asking person B to drive dangerously and break the law. You only ask someone to do either one these things in an emergency situation. This wasn't that. Person A needs to leave person B to drive properly and safely.

It’s pretty obviously A is your son and B is DH.

B did nothing wrong, it wasn’t on him to describe the route to A and check if that would be ok for him. If A has a history of travel sickness (even years ago) then the responsibility is on them.

A sounds pathetic trying to blame others and B was extremely patient and did well to drive in a stressful distracting situation. I wouldn’t have carried on.

The way this is written either you are person A or agree fully with them 🤣

it was just one of those things, neither could win and neither were wrong or right (however I do agree with the driver re driving too slow as it can be more dangerous and I wouldn’t do it!) - forget it, move on and person A needs to make sure they take travel sickness meds in the future!

Driving significantly under the speed limit is dangerous and should not be a solution. If A was that ill, they should have curtailed the journey and continued when A was feeling better. Hopefully awareness of the landscape would prevent further sickness.

Im assuming you’re B, OP.

Both were unreasonable. A should not ask B to put other road users and themselves at risk by driving significantly under the speed limit, and B should have taken matters into their own hands and decided to stop the journey u til A was fit to travel.

I could not have driven with person A.

I feel sorry for person A but person B was dtiving and if person B thought it wohld be unsafe to slow down or cause issues on the road then they would have to keep driving regardless of person As sickness. We had a similar drive with my son doen a mountain oass and had to stop several times for him to be sick. But we needed to get to our destination too so had to keep going.

No-one is wrong. Fear of heights is horrible. I am a bit like that specifically with precipices. I will close my eyes to try and control my fear but can still feel the drop near me. Awful. Is A still upset with B? I'd get very panicky in this kind situation although nothing so bad as described. But once passed I would understand why the driver had to keep driving at an acceptable speed..

Motion sickness or a stomach bug?

If I had a passenger behaving like this I would want to get to my destination as soon as possible. B was already driving under the speed limit, A is being unreasonable (although understandably given what they were suffering).

It sounds like a nightmare scenario for both A and B and unhelpful to categorise either as being right or wrong.

A was very unwell and their body (and mind) was in panic mode

B was trying to be helpful but it wasn’t enough to help A

Edited to add: it might have been better if they stopped the journey altogether. I wouldn’t want to continue if I was A or B in this scenario.

Dismayed by the people on here who think that having a panic attack is childish, or that the situation didn’t ‘warrant’ one, as if a panic attack is something you choose to switch on or off. A shameful attitude imo.

OP sounds like they are Person A and unwilling to accept any different viewpoint.

The driver has ultimate responsibility to drive safely, and that means going at a speed predictable to other cars. Safety trumps sickness every time.

OP sounds like they are Person A and unwilling to accept any different viewpoint.

Nah I reckon person A is OPs precious little man child son who seems to want to carry on this pathetic argument and keep blaming B (likely her DH or DP).

A was wrong. A didn't want to stop -- B was willing to stop. B as the driver gets to choose the safe speed, especially as they were already driving under the speed limit.

A is being unreasonable. Person B was driving the car and was doing their best. At the time it must have seemed it was better to safely get to their destination as soon as possible. They are responsible for the safety of other roads users as well and it's their job to judge that.
Horrible situation but person A is being unreasonable in my opinion.

Person A would be walking

Driving too slow can be incredibly dangerous so I’d say they either pull over for a good while or just drive at normal speed to reach destination. Person A had a bag so should have unfortunately just got on with it until the destination was reached.

Person B should just slow down.

Apparently (confirmed by B) "Some" of it has barriers but quite a lot doesnt despite having a drop that would end in an air ambulance job at best.

Having read this, I am even more of the opinion that B needed to slow-the-fuck down. Mountain roads can be dangerous. Over-confidence when driving too fast for conditions is dangerous.

You do realise adults can get travel sick don’t you? I get it at age 40 and it’s miserable. Wouldn’t wish it on my worst enemy.

40 on a 60.road probably had people wanting to punch the pair of them.

Next time get some meds or take a train.

Person A doesn’t want to stop regularly to be sick, so presumably that means they want Person B to keep on driving. If height is the issue, the slower B goes, the longer A has to see down into the abyss, so the quicker they go the better. Not to mention the fact that driving too slowly is dangerous as other road users become impatient and are more likely to recklessly overtake, increasing the likelihood of an accident - even more so on a mountain road! B just needed to get on with it and complete the journey. Sounds to me like everyone lived to tell the tale, which goes to show that B’s speed was fine and A was panicking needlessly. Next time A gets motion sickness, tell them to stare at a fixed spot on the horizon, or some sort of fixed distant object as best they can. That will help with the sickness and also mean that if they’re travelling on a mountain road again they don’t end up staring down into the abyss again!

You seem overly invested in A being in the right when the majority of people believe B is/was.