Work event.. left me out of the planning

[Notthattimeofthemonth]

We have a work day out next month and they have asked us to bring in a baby picture and they are going to guess who’s who to get us all networking.

I’m the only black person out of 126 people going so wouldn’t take them very long to guess who’s who.

im trying to calm down before I address this as I’m currently infuriated.

how on earth do I proceed with this in the correct way..

Can you really not see why this would be awkward/problematic for the OP?
I’m white too but am cringing at the thought of it! Use your brain.

@ByPeachSeal if "the best person for the job" were to get it, every time, regardless of race or colour, do you think it is realistic that only one of those people out of 126 would be black? Really?!

This.

I can totally see why you feel left out, OP. I’d definitely raise it.

Truly fascinating how posters are saying “oh they just didn’t think about you” like that’s a perfect solution.

…Grand yeah, that makes it all ok, I’m sure OP feels very welcome in her workplace now.

Your colleagues who planned this are idiots. We had one black kid in my high school year group, and for our Prom, one of the teachers suggested the baby photo game. We, the students, had to point out what an idiotic idea it was. Just a way to other him, to single him out and ensure he couldn’t join the game the same way as everyone else. Of course he could still guess but everyone would be pointing at his, shouting it out right away, having a giggle about how obvious it is etc. It’s othering him. We all knew it in school…. How is this still happening?

OP, you are right to be angry about this. About the insensitivity and just plain idiocy.

That's a weird thing to get worked up about. The same could be said for someone with a birthmark or ginger hair

No, it isn’t. Check your unconscious racism. Maybe listen and learn about it.

Well statistically, yes. Only 4% of the UK population identifies as black, and most live in major cities. So in London I would expect a few black people in every company, yes, but in the middle of Devon for instance you can struggle to find a black face. Depending on where OP lives, it is quite reasonable that there are no other black people in the company.

But anyway, that’s not the point of the thread.

You’re right to react the way you have. Someone suggested in my work and I pointed out that it would be unfair to the one black person in our department. Idea shelved. It’s not inclusive.

can’t believe other people think it’s ok.

Damned with faint praise. Nearly half the workforce of our very successful company is BAME, with BAME colleagues at the exec level as well.

And that's because the company recognises you need diversity to succeed, not just 'a few black people'

I dont think this is intentional at all from your company, at the time of them thinking this was a good idea they would not have considered people's race, disabilities, hair colours, you name it. However, this does need raising with them as this will play out in a way that is totally unfair to you. If I was the only white person I would tell them either I am not taking part, or another 20 white babies photos need adding so that I have the same chance of people guessing me as everyone else.

@Startingagainandagain
Why should the OP has to point out the blindingly obvious? people should be able to do their job properly, and that includes being mindful of inclusivity and diversity in everything they do, without needing someone to remind them to do it.

Well, clearly, in this case, they do need reminding, so unless OP points it out, they're likely to do the same/something similar in the future!

I would definitely raise it -this is from an online article and lists all the reasons it is a really bad idea - https://medium.com/swlh/the-danger-of-team-building-activities-and-ice-breakers-5afd068070a9

• “Everyone bring in/send in a baby photo/photo of you in college and we’ll guess who is who!” / any “guess that person” photo game from various life stages
• This one is my ultimate inclusivity nightmare when it comes to ice-breakers; it poses so many potential landmines. Baby photos can be hard to obtain for people who have lost parents, are estranged from their family, or were adopted as an older child. A younger photo can show a gender expression that doesn’t match the person’s actual gender in the case of trans, non-binary, and gender non-conforming folks. Someone may not have attended college/high school at the “socially expected” age, or at all. The quality/colouring on a baby photo (grainy, sepia, black & white, etc.) can show the age of a person, which can be especially tough if there is an outlier or two in the group, either younger or older. And if there is only one person of a specific racial or ethnic group in the group, a baby photo reduces them to their race or ethnicity. (Or if there are only two, I’m sure it feels great to be mixed up.)

I’m confused about the title of your post. It says you were left out of the planning. Have they not asked you to bring a photo?

Nothing is wrong with the OP raising it. Of course not.
But it's tiring being the one who has to raise it. True allyship is someone raising it because it's wrong not because they are affected

We did this recently at work and have a small team including one black female and only one male

I didn’t want people to feel like you do, so I mixed in some celebrity bandy pictures too so that I could make it inclusive

I’m sorry that you are being treated like this and would absolutely raise it with HR

What's wrong with two truths and a lie anyway ?

I do, yes. @Ace56 has said what I was going to say.

If you find it distasteful just politely opt out, or say you don't have any baby pictures. They might just say just choose a jokey picture as it doesn't really even have to be you.
I'm sure the last thing they wanted was to cause offence. It really is just to get people chatting, maybe some light mocking if people supply silly pictures etc.
There could be others who are equally identifiable, by hair, glasses, just their face even?!
I hope you don't let it upset you.

OP, just an idea but you could cut and paste several black babies into a single photo with you and tell them you didn't want to make it too easy so they have to guess which one is you ... that might be a nice way of addressing it with good humour while pointing out the obvious.

Yes @Keepthosenamesgoing it's important to have allies - but in this instance, @Notthattimeofthemonth has also revealed that she works in HR, so she is more than well positioned to deal with something like this. In fact, she would be remiss if she didn't as, I assume, she's also responsible for upholding any DIE policies.

despite 4 pages (or so) of plenty of people pointing out exactly why it IS an issue.

why isn't it an issue?

It’s really not about the probability of solving the puzzle: it’s a giggle to see people with bowl cuts and undyed hair and neat little cardigans. That’s all. Yes, they’ll pair you to your photo immediately. But then they’d do that if one person in the group has extremely bright ginger hair or has very very curly blonde hair even as a baby.

@WigglyVonWaggly has just explained why in the post after yours.

Oh, so the other 125 attendees were involved in the planning but not you?