To break up with him on his birthday?

[Faceissues]

Hi all. I've been with my boyfriend for about 10 months and he has cheated on me with atleast 4 different women in that time. The last time it happened (about 6 weeks ago) he actually rang me from his bedroom to reassure me he was home with just his male friends and they were gonna have a drink and go to bed. His friend then put a story on social media of them all downstairs with women drinking etc. It again turned out he had took someone home and slept with her. He begged, pleaded and swore that he felt awful and he would never do it again. In fairness to him things have been great since then.

Today (friday) is his birthday. He went to the pub with his friends and said he would be going home when it shut. He rang me about half 11 to say he was going out out, to the same club he has met all these women at, with the same friends and I'm just an absolute wreck. I've been crying since I spoke to him and I feel so anxious. He said I need to trust him but I've heard it so many times before I just can't.

We are supposed to be going out with his family this evening for his birthday. WIBU to call it off today? I can't keep feeling like this but it's awful timing.

Thanks

Why on earth did this happen more than once?

You must have barely known the bloke the first time he cheated. Why on earth didn't you dump him then?

Yes, dump him now, and then spend some time working out why you let him walk all over you before you start looking to date again.

Not all men lie and cheat. You deserve better op.

And he deserves to be dumped on his birthday.

I don't see why you'd call it off now when he's already cheated on you four times in 10 months and you're still with him. What's one more for the road?

Of course you should split up with him btw. But you should also examine why you stayed with him after he treated you so badly.

end the relationship now, birthday or not.
And gently op, please go and get some counselling to work on your self esteem. You're worth so much more than this. It's worrying that you don't seem outraged by what he's done and that you'd even give
one, never mind several chances

Dump him, he doesn't care about you, why should you care about his birthday

I thought this was maybe a bit harsh from the title - then I read your post.

I think the absolute least you should do is ruin the lying prick's birthday! Enjoy it. Then go out with your girlfriends and have fun. He's not worth another second of your energy.

This is not a marriage of twenty years which you’re desperately trying to save after infidelity. This is a brand new relationship with a guy who has been cheating on you the whole time. The whole time. Why are you with him? How desperate for a man are you? Seriously, where is your self worth? Why are you with this guy? Why did you stay after the first time, then the second, then the third and then again 6 weeks ago? Does he have a magic cock or something?

Wake up. Know your worth. What are you doing? Jesus.

YABU to break up with him just because he’s going to this club.

YANBU to break up with him because he’s a lying, cheating scum bag.

But let’s be honest, you have no plans to break up with him as you would have done it already.

He is of course in the wrong but people only treat us how we allow ourselves to be treated.
He isn’t going to change and so it’s up to you to decide whether you want to be treated this way or not.

Get rid - he doesn’t give a shit about you so tough luck if it’s his birthday

Get rid. He doesn't value you or your feelings

A friend of mine dumped his now wife a few days before her 21st because he didn't want to go to her birthday party and meet her family! Now that was unreasonable but it's an amusing story. Every day is a good day to dump someone that care so very little about your feelings

Honestly, I'd be tempted to do it after the main and before the desert in front of his family. :-) Then, leave with your head held high, grinning from ear to ear as your mission is accomplished - you have humiliated him the way he has humiliated you by gaslighting you

Like @Bushwhacked20 says
"If he makes you cry now he will always make you cry. In time you'll be glad you binned him."
Birthday is irrelevant.
How and why will you sit through the family dinner, acting out a part, knowing what you know and watching his friends and family toast and pay tribute to him. It would be a nauseating ordeal. Why would you put yourself through that to spare his feelings? After the way he's treated you.

Yes. They might say, "Oh no. not on his birthday!" but as he's such a smooth operator he will probably make an excuse for you not being there. Or he may play the sympathy card. Either way, you won't be there to see it.

Plus if you are worried about him spreading the story or even about hurting his feelings (lol) A school friend was dumped shortly after being wined, dined etc on Valentines , because he felt it would be cruel to do it on the actual day. He presented it as doing her a real favour and a kindness.
Everyone thought it was more despicable than breaking up on the day because it led to false expectations. The friend felt she'd been made an absolute fool of on top of the breakup, and all her friends agreed.
The truth is always better.

Just do it. You owe him nothing

He thinks you should trust him?! What planet is he on?

Just dump him now

Dump him and stay single until you work on yourself and are able to walk away the first time someone cheats on you. If you allow someone to cheat they will take it as a free pass to do it constantly.

It sounds like he wants his freedom, so let that be your gift to him. Ditch the cheat today and never look back.

Reading the title, my immediate reaction was 'No! That's so mean!' But reading that he has brazenly cheated on you. Yeah, fuck him. End it today. He deserves it. What a wanker.

You should have dumped him months ago. He's been a spectacular prick to you repeatedly, you absolutely can not and should not trust this selfish, immature wankstain of a boy. Your big mistake was allowing him to treat this way. Fix that now, tell him happy birthday and fuck off, block him and never look back.

I am not sure why you are asking this. Yes break up with him. You should have done it the first time. Do it now. Block his number. Dump any of his stuff you have at your house out into the street. Get some self worth.

No don't break up on his birthday. He won't necessarily see those women when he goes out just because he met them there.

Why are you waiting for the 5th time?

You know he's a cheating asshole. You know this and he regularly repeats it.

What on earth is ging on that you are putting up with this? It's crap and he doesn't give a shit.

He's cheated on you FOUR TIMES IN 10 MONTHS and you're fretting about dumping him on his birthday? Fucking hell.

I would not only dump him on his birthday, I would dump him at the birthday meal, in front of his bloody family, and I'd probably chuck his drink in his face for good measure. Jeez.

Did you miss the part where he's already cheated on her four times prior to that? Fucking hell.

I didn't, but birthdays are special

Who cares about his birthday. Just break up which you should have already done after he cheated you for the first time.