Should I refuse reception settling in days if I can?

[Jiski]

Hi,

Has anyone ever gotten their child to stay full time when it’s supposed to be a settling in day. Can you do it? How did you do it?

I’ve read on an old post that it was possible, but the link to government guidance doesn’t work and I don’t know if I just can’t find it or if it’s outdated advice now.

My son already goes to nursery full time and does lots of other activities like Squirrels and swimming so he’s used to long days. Also, I don’t think he needs to settle in as he’s been to playgroup at the school a number of times and should be in a class with 3 of his nursery friends.

FYI I don’t have any annual leave left as my annual leave year resets in November.

Thanks

It would be a no from our primary. We paid the daycare to do pick up and drop off until dc started full time then we used school wrap around service.

What are you going to do when it half days and early finishes and teacher training days etc?

I started school in 1984 and remember doing mornings for the first week, afternoons for the second week. My DC is currently in reception and did 10am-12pm the first week, 9-12pm the second week, slightly longer the next two weeks.

UK schools have been doing this staggered approach for decades and decades!! Why did you use up all your annual leave? Did you not realise your child was starting school in September? It’s a few weeks of disruption. The children are really tired those first few weeks, it’s a big change. Schools aren’t childcare, they are doing shorter days initially to ensure a slow steady start. There’s been a thread running for the last few days on here about a 4 and half year old who has never poohed and weed in a toilet. Some of these children are still like babies. Stop trying to make out it’s for the good of the children to start full-time, it’s because it’s inconvenient to you to pick them up at midday.

Four years you’ve had to get this sorted.

I'd be re thinking your leave and look fo summer schemes this summer for dc so you can save your annual leave for spetember

Schools are obliged to provide children with the opportunity of a full time school space from the beginning.

The ruling that made this obligation clear is this one:
https://assets.publishing.service.gov.uk/government/uploads/system/uploads/attachment_data/file/296261/ada2479_st_marks_primary_bournemouth_16aug13.pdf

But the school admissions code does also now say that children must be provided with a full-time space. (See section 2.17)

The school has had 11 years to get it sorted since the Adjudicator ruling making it clear they must provide full-time spaces from the start if that’s what the parent prefers.

At a whim? You’ve had four years (at least) notice to get this sorted. When you had your baby, did you not realise they would be starting school in September 2024? Staggered starts are not a new fangled thing. It’s part and parcel of your child starting school. Did you and your DH not give your employers / your colleagues / your clients / business partners etc notice in the last year or so that you may have to take annual leave in Sept 2024? That you may need flexibility, may need to catch up in the evenings, may need to nip out, may need to take unpaid leave, may need to swap shifts etc etc. I think this is on you to work around, not the school.

The people banging on about how essential the phased transition is, are rather undermined by the fact that loads of schools don’t do it. None of my 4 kids have had a phased start. All went in full time from the first day, as per the school’s standard arrangement (3 different schools).

when I started school myself in 1989, we all went in full time from the first day…

I’m sure you can insist that the school keep them all day. I wouldn’t myself. I think children want to be doing what everyone else is doing, and it would be a nice opportunity to spend the afternoon with them.

I think it would be a bit overwhelming and upsetting for children to be the only one staying for the afternoon, especially if put into the year 1 class.

Did you not realise that there would be such days when you booked all these holidays? I would be rethinking how I organised my leave for the year or looking at some unpaid parental leave.

Surely it’s much nicer for the children to start in a quieter classroom with a better chance for the teacher to get to know them?
Usually half the class do the mornings and half do the afternoons.
A classroom is a very different environment than a nursery - 30 new children, many of whom will have behaviour issues/development issues/not toilet trained, with only 2 new adults to look after them, trying to settle them, stop them hurting each other, change pants/clothes/nappies, comfort those who are crying.
It’s a very stressful, noisy, hectic environment to be in for a 4 year old who won’t know where anything is, what to do and when, why they can’t do things they used to do at nursery, why they have to line up, sit down etc
Part time start makes so much sense. Schools are not like they used to be - there are so many more children with behaviour and development issues.

You need a plan B for parenting. There will be loads of days when your child is off school and you don’t have annual leave to cover it.

I thought settling in was pretty sensible tbh. My DS went to nursery full time but lost his mind when he started school, it really is a world of difference. Our school had 2 settling in days and then started full time.

Can you not take unpaid parental leave? Jiggle your flexible hours temporarily?

They don’t transition the children in a specific way for shits and giggles.

You should have been more responsible and saved some annual leave days for the school transition, just like everyone else does! How many days is the phased transition? Ours is 3 days of half days and then full time the following week. Half the class in the morning and the other half in the afternoon. This allows the teachers to get to know them a bit before they begin. You’re already being that parent that thinks that the rules don’t apply to them and will throw their toys out of the pram if there is something they don’t agree with.

Can you speak to the school? They may well be flexible on the settling in period. You won't know if you don't ask!

The “rule” is that the school is legally obliged to provide her DC with a full time space. It is a requirement schools have known about since the adjudicator ruling 11 years ago.

She hasn’t been irresponsible, she’s tried to manage her finances sensibly.

There’s a reason schools transition the children into full time. Generally speaking, it’s done over a couple of days which is for the benefit of the children. I could understand the inconvenience if it were weeks, but I bet this isn’t the case.

They are not a babysitting service there to work around the OP’s work schedule. Of course she has been irresponsible. She’s used all of her annual leave and not taken into consideration that she needs to be there to support her child over a couple of days when they start school. She’s happy to shove the kid in without a backward glance because it’s convenient. That is being irresponsible and making poor parenting choices.

Just call and ask the school.

Reception teachers at my DDs school do visits to the preschool settings as well as settling in days.

One of my DDs did her settling in session on her own on a different day to the other children due to our circumstances at the time. The other children did 2 half days, our dd did just over 1 half day.

You have to remember the days are planned out in advance and it will be dependant on the schools layout, for want of a better word, whether they can accommodate a change to their usual settling in plan.

But you won’t know unless you ask.

Alternatively, if you already have established relationships with other parents, could you ask someone to help with pick up and minding your dd for a couple of hours on that day?

The School Admissions Code was changed in 2021 and now states that schools must be able to provide full-time provision from the beginning of the academic year.

Schools that don't are not acting within the legislation.

The relevant paragraph is 2.17 in the Code.

All the schools in our Trust offered full time places when the Code changed and tge children settle much quicker than they did before.

There is no evidence to back up a part-time transition being beneficial. It's largely done because the school 'has always done it that way'.

Since the School Admissions Code made it explicit in 2021 that full-time places should be offered from the first day of the academic year, decent schools have changed.

If schools are not aware of this change, what else are they not aware of?

OH FFS!!
Teachers go into school during the holidays to male sure their class is set up and ready to run first day nail.
Activities/lessons are planned and resources sorted well before a child enters the class.

When I taught reception we offered either part days 10-2 first week, 9.30-2.30 2nd week and then in full time 3rd week. Most children came in full time immediately but we only had a small intake with mixed aged classes so the older children already knew routines etc

There are several reasons schools are legally required to provide full-time education from the get go and one of them is that parents absolutely need to be able to rely on them to look after their DC for the whole school day. The child care role of school has always been important and that importance has increased as more mothers of young children have moved into paid employment. It was seen clearly during COVID just how vital the school’s role as a “babysitting service” (as you put it) is.

OP has every right to rely on the expectation her DC will get the school hours they are legally entitled to. Both for educational purposes and in terms of child care. State education is free at the point of service and that means that, except in very proscribed circumstances, schools cannot require parents to cover costs. That includes not requiring parents to cover the costs of childcare because the school would like to have fewer children in that day. Even if it is beneficial to most children (and the evidence does not support it) it is not something that our society has deemed important enough to specifically cover the cost of or require parents to cover the cost of. It’s something teachers came up with, probably without any thought to the costs to families.

OP has not been irresponsible to use her annual leave to minimize her childcare costs if they are struggling for money. It’s entirely sensible to do so. And it’s sensible of her to look at what she is legally entitled to expect her DC’s school to provide and structure her holiday and work around that - which she has done.

Bollocks! Mine were all more than ready for school and were irritated by the namby-pamby "settling in" days.

Some schools do take it to extremes.

Our school had settling in days but as our kids had been at nursery full time from 1year old we just said no. A quick tour of the school when we chose it and that was it. Some kids did half days but they were mainly the ones that hadn’t been to full time or any nursery at all.

Id love someone to tell me why some schools do Home Visits.

Is this a new thing
Do all schools do it
Why

Home visits are certainly not a new thing. We had home visits for both my children circa 1998 and 2004. My children both loved showing the teacher their favourite toys etc and it seemed a positive thing to do even if I did have to book half a day off work

Thanks.
But why do some schools do this and others not. My kids started 2004 and 2007

We do home visits for two reasons. The main reason is for your child to meet us in their own environment, which shows them that we are safe adults that you trust to allow into your home. The other reason is for us to see what kind of home the child has. Since Covid very few professionals such as health visitors go into children's homes and we can identify if support is needed for a family. I've done lots of home visits over the years and on a few occasions have seen some quite alarming things which have needed a referral. The one which stands out the most was a family which had dog and cat poo all over the floor inside. You could smell it from outside.

I think some parents think that we are being nosey and want to judge what kind of tea you offer us, but was actually want to put your child at ease before one of the biggest events of our lives and check they are not living in a dangerous environment.