Should I refuse reception settling in days if I can?

[Jiski]

Hi,

Has anyone ever gotten their child to stay full time when it’s supposed to be a settling in day. Can you do it? How did you do it?

I’ve read on an old post that it was possible, but the link to government guidance doesn’t work and I don’t know if I just can’t find it or if it’s outdated advice now.

My son already goes to nursery full time and does lots of other activities like Squirrels and swimming so he’s used to long days. Also, I don’t think he needs to settle in as he’s been to playgroup at the school a number of times and should be in a class with 3 of his nursery friends.

FYI I don’t have any annual leave left as my annual leave year resets in November.

Thanks

Why didn't you save some A/L for this purpose? It's pretty widely known that pretty much all schools do this.

It's widely known that some schools do this. There are plenty who start full time from day one. The OP shouldn't have to save A/L to cover random half days, especially as staggered starts actually cause confusion and upset for many young children when starting school.

No one is saying staggered starts / settling in sessions shouldn't be available to children who need them, but the vast majorty of children cope better with the transition to school when they start full time from day one.

Childminder or nursery? I used nursery for some sessions, so did half day at school, then took them to nursery. Not many days but some. Then I found that school tired them out so much that were docile enough to watch tv, play a game quietly whilst I wfh.

we did half days for two weeks, I didn’t have that kind of annual leave left

My son leaves nursery on July 18th. I have annual leave so I don’t have to spend over £1000 on nursery fees that I can’t afford.

Widely known if you're on Mumsnet as this thread appears every year! 😆

You mentioned a husband, can he not take time off? There's a lot of "I" and not much "we"

I have no leave left
I can't afford childcare
Etc.

You can afford them now though? I think you should consider putting him in nursery an extra month

My DD started full time from day 1 (incl after school clubs) and she coped fine (and is the youngest in her year) - she just accepted it as normal I think as it's what big sis was doing.

As far as I’m aware the school are required to take children full time from day 1 if that’s what parents want. If they’ve set up their first few days in a way that a parent requesting this would be an issue for another child, that is on the school to sort out.

I get 30 free hours now. I don’t get that in the holidays

But part of the settling in is being in the new environment with fewer children - which isn't going to be the case if everyone sends their children in full-time.

He doesn’t either.

I’m a newbie I signed up a month or 2 ago

Why should the OP pay another month of nursery fees, when she could send her child to school full time from the start of term?

And yet that happens at schools all over the country. The kids cope fine because it's what they are anticipating.

The children I find most unsettled are those who don't know whether they are coming or going, or why they only stay for lunch some days and not others, why granny picked them up yesterday but today it's auntie Kathy or why they are suddenly back in nursery the day they start big school.

My son was at the school nursery 2.5 days per week and he started full time from day one. Those who had done mornings or afternoons over 5 days at the nursery or came from private day care did a week of half days.

They don’t need settling in days. Our school stopped this and everyone was much happier with it. The more parents go against and insist they have them full time from the start the more likely the school is to get rid of this pointless practice.

Exactly. A classroom isn't just 10 children and 2 members of staff, and the school day doesn't end at lunchtime. So why do we think children settle any better by pretending that's what school is like for a week or longer? Children who start full time from day one understand this is what being at school is, and the vast majority cope with it. For those that struggle, staggered starts and half days are useful.

I remember this post from last year and I am still so relieved DD's school had just a single half day setting session, the reception teacher thought this was the best idea. Others schools in the area were on half days until half term and a friend with a child at one of these schools asked for her child to go full time from day one.

’Entitled’
’Right’
’Tell’
‘Inform’
’Demand’
’Challenge’

All words used in this thread to talk about sending children in full time from day one AND other threads about taking children out for term time holidays!

Schools (and teachers) are not the enemy! We are just trying to do the best for ALL children in our care. We even do staggered starts in Secondary with Y7/12 starting before other years. You only start school once and for some it can be a really big deal. Best to have a window of time to be able to iron out small issues before they become big ones.

Because her kid is going to have to end up sat in a classroom on their own or with one other kid or in with the older kids. They'll wonder what's going on that means they don't get to go home when everyone else does

A staggered start may work best for some children but wouldn’t for mine which is why they went full time from day one including breakfast and after school club. Very common when there are two full time working parents.

Best to have a window of time to be able to iron out small issues before they become big ones.

How do you iron out problems like a child being overwhelmed by being in a busy class of 30 for a full day, if they've spent 3 weeks with just half the class and leaving at lunchtime?

The settling in process isn't helpful I don't think. For children who have been in pre school or nursery full time it's a backwards step.
My 2nd started reception this year, abd I have an older one in year 3. From March I started gradually 'nudging' the head of EYFS to a less drawn out settling period, and we got it down from 3.5 weeks for all to 3 days for older children and 1.5 weeks for younger children.
And yes I was fully aware of her entitlement to full time school from day 1. But I also wanted to maintain a really positive relationship with the school my child would attend for the next 7 years of their life, rather than going in with an entitled attitude.

What makes you think the child will be in a classroom alone. The likelihood is there will be multiple parents who wish to send their child full time from day one. The child won't be wondering why everyone goes home but them any more than they would be wondering why they are back at nursery with the babies when they are meant to be at big school.

There’s a few of us parents who will probably request it so he won’t be on his own.