Do you know what's in your parents' Will(s)?

[YorkshireTrailRunner]

Just that really.
I've spent the past 20+ years begging my folks to make Wills, to which they always retorted 'we don't need to, you're our only child, it will all come to you' - I'm 50, gay (lesbian) childless, for context.
Found out this evening that they have made Wills but they hadn't told me. And that they have left stipulated amounts to charities. My Will leaves everything to them, only goes to charities - including theirs- if they pre-decease me.
It's absolutely their money to do with as they wish, but there's a real chance one or either will need care. AIBU to swallow any discomfort and ask for more disclosure?

even if you're not willing to ask them to share more detail about the content of their wills, it's worth finding out:
(a) who will be the executor of each will?
(b) have they made any provision for the possibility that they may not always be able to manage/ make decisions regarding their care, finances, life admin etc (eg power of attorney)?

I'm not worried about finding more information while they're alive. When they're gone, I/we will be able to find a Will or we won't, and we'll deal with whatever it says or its absence at that point.

I'm not worried about being named as executor. I've seen it done by close relatives both with and without bought legal help, and with a simple case and a complex international al one. If I am named as executor and I can't do it myself then I'll hand it to a solicitor to do it for me.

I really would rather not damage any relationships now by getting information. Will deal with it at the time!

@EmmaPeele I've known my PIL for 35 years now and I am of no more importance to them than their new window cleaner. It's all about their children including DH but if he was to go, I'm not sure they'd even send a Christmas card.

It's always about discussing things with the siblings or between the siblings. I've no idea how they haven't rumbled that it isn't DH that has organised and hosted visits, sent cards, suggested solutions....thiv

Even my BIL's 'new' wife has been on the scene for ten years, blood will always be thicker with this bunch. It's made me quietly resentful in recent years.

Yes, I'm the executor of my parents will.

Nope, don’t know, don’t care. It’s their money to do whatever they want with.

I was there when my mother's Will was drawn up as we were sorting out POAs at the same time.
After the POAs were registered, the originals were stored in the solicitors' vaults & I was given authenticated copies to send off as necessary.
They also authenticated a copy of the will for me as I was the executor & also stored the original in the vault.

It's going to be a similar thing with my Dad & Stepmother - I know what they've got planned & I'm the executor.
Their solicitor is in the process of registering the signed POAs.
All documents to be stored in the solicitors' vaults.
Obviously if there are any changes to the current wills then it is up to them to decide whether to inform me or not.

No I don't know and don't care tbh. I expect they'll be fair to all their dc as they always have been.

No I do not but recently discovered by chance that my mum has put her entire house in her new husbands name. The house was given to her by my grandparents on the understanding it would be passed onto me and my siblings eventually to form part of our inheritance. I guess that was going to be a surprise for us in the future but at least I know now I suppose, haven’t told my sibling though as don’t want to start a battle.

Yes totally equal split between self and DB, DM jewellery to me, DF watch and wedding ring to DB

I have abusive parents who were financially abusive when I was growing up and always 'will waving' when I was an adult.

We aren't in contact now at all so I would say that I've probably been disinherited. They might skip me and leave something to my son but who knows? I'm not sure I'll find out that they've died...

I don't wish them ill at all, I'm just really sad that the family has fallen apart the way it has and that they are so troubled.

On the plus side I've created a happy family and I try to be a good person.

'Do what you can with what you have where you are' is my motto.

I do, my mum sorted POA at same time so as I was signing that she also let me read her will.

Yes roughly. To be split between all siblings. Includes sale of properties and a decision to be made around current family business

One parent left. Several children and grandchildren in the mix. The Will states the property to go to 1 grandchild, 50% of money to 1 child and remaining 50% shared between other children.

@GMMagnet Exactly same situation here. I'll never be " real family" to them and our children are adopted so they think even less of them, which is quite sad really. They treat their daughter's husband the same way, he's not classed as "real family" either, we actually have a laugh about it between us. However, If I've learned anything from it, it's that I know exactly how not to treat any future partners and children my son's may have.

Yes - everything goes to me as I'm the only child and only family in the country.

I have an awful feeling that my parents will come up with something excessively complicated relating to grandchildren (possibly leaving a house split between them). But will disregard the awkward stuff with siblings.

I would like to buy my siblings out of the house we grew up in. One sibling disinherited and NC. One sibling no interest in the house. One sibling wouldn't want the responsibility of the house and would happily see it go to me.

It would make more sense for the assets to be left to us jointly and if I can afford the house, then keep it.

Not make it weird for grandkids to sort out (0, 2 and 1 across families respectively).