Just had a blazing row with a builder

[musicthroughthewall]

Not working for me, he keeps parking across my driveway. I’ve asked him again to move it and he said all I have to do is be polite and ask.l each time.

I responded with I was polite the first time and how about he just doesn’t do it. And wow did it escalate. He was screaming that he pays road tax and can park where he wants, I pointed out it’s a dropped curb so no he can’t.

Honestly. It got so much worse, he called me a fucking bitch. Now I feel vulnerable in my own home.

Aibu? I shouldn’t repeatedly have to ask someone to stop blocking my car. I’ve noticed he doesn’t block the driveway of the people he’s working for.

And the one common factor with all these stories? Men.

Is it? Always seems to be women moaning about builders.

Yes, we should know our place. If a man calls a bitch we should quietly thank them and definitely not complain.

Next time he parks there, don't ask him to move. Just ring the local council to come and tow it.

Call either community enforcement or the council, whoever deals with this stuff in your area.

Personally I would not have spoken to the builders at all, they don’t care what you think, you aren’t the one paying them. I would have spoken to the neighbour who are having the renovations and ask them to make it clear to the builders that they cannot block neighbours drives, sure as hell they won’t be telling their customer to eff off!

The OP says the neighbours have form for not caring.

OP has said the neighbours don't care.

Best thing to do is just ring the council.

Don't confront him or give him the opportunity to move. You've already told him and he became aggressive. He's had his chance.

There is also no point ringing the council/ police after he's already moved.

Every time it happens in future, ring the relevant authority as soon as you see the van there.

A man screaming like that at a woman (actually regardless of if he was in the wrong, which he clearly is) is hugely threatening. I’d personally have rung the police.

I agree. If he was actually screaming that is.

Aside from his threatening behaviour, it’s so tiring to constantly hear of people inventing this “road tax” that they don’t pay as an excuse to be dicks whether it’s parking or how they treat other roads users such as cyclists.

Red flag? She just wants him to move, not shag him! 😆

I completely understand why you’re angry, but you need to drop the sexist line IMO as these pricks are arseholes to everyone, not just women.
If you were a man you’d be called the ‘c word’ and possibly worse; these people know no boundaries and always think they’re right whatever they do.

Good luck - I’ve had similar (I’m a man) and I was threatened with violence, damage to my house etc - all caught on CCTV.
All that because I had the audacity to ask the Openreach van that was blocking my drive (not working on my property) to move so I could collect DC from school.
I just calmly got my phone out and played the footage back to him, which turned the abuse into a sob story about how his life is falling apart, he’ll lose his job if it gets out - apparently I was then ‘changing the subject’ when I pointed out he was happy to threaten me until I had the upper hand!

I hope he lost his job, people like that shouldn’t deal with the public.

My partner's a 6'2 ex amateur boxer (quite apparent from his squished nose lol). They tend to move pretty quick when he asks. 🤣

All very nice. However. Whether or not you pay ‘Road Tax’ doesn’t alter the fact that it’s illegal to park across someone’s driveway if there is a dropped kerb and a car parked on the drive. It isn’t the act of parking there itself that is illegal, it’s the fact that you are blocking access to a public highway. If there is no car on the driveway you are not blocking access, but ingress from the highway, which is not an offence.

Last year we had major roadworks outside my house for months. I can assure you the people living there were much more fed up with the temporary lights than you were and the company doing the work outside my house were very conscious of how much we were inconvenienced so letting someone off his drive seems reasonable to me. How many seconds were you delayed?

We had some people chatting by the house who were outraged they had to wait at the traffic lights and it was adding minutes to their commute. Their solution was it was tough luck for us but the work should go on 24/7 so their inconvenience was reduced. As it was we had them working 12 hours a day 5 days a week and half a day on Saturday, the noise and dust were terrible and my DH has breathing issues so at one point I thought it was going to kill him.

I quoted the Office for Budget Responsibility earlier, they clearly state VED is a tax.

If he blocks you again, just keep going round and asking him to move it - every 20/30mins or so. Do it very very politely but so often that he will get the picture

I didn't say VED wasn't a tax. I said "road tax" doesn't exist.

It is a road tax, if you take your car off road you don't need it ie you SORN it. It is a tax, it is because you need it to have your car on the road. It is so boring that any thread where road tax is mentioned you get the same responses with people jumping on the bandwagon. You know what it means, it is a good description and is so boring to bang on about "it isn't road tax."

But it isn't a "road tax." People use the term 'road tax' to demand that cyclists, horses etc. shouldn't use the road because they don't pay it and try it use it when defending themselves whilst parking inconsiderately like the OP. In fact, we all pay towards the upkeep the roads, regardless of whether you pay VED or not. I disagree that it's a 'good description' and it's boring when people argue they pay a non existant 'road tax.'

Have you never experienced the 'joys' of how some boundary-less school mums park in the most inappropriate places - and then get angry and aggressive when people object to them doing whatever they like?

Neither sex has the monopoly on anti-social and selfish parking.

I heartily agree that, although people do pay various taxes and charges in order to be able to use their cars - including one that is commonly understood and known as 'road tax' - this in no way buys you the right to park/drive/act illegally, selfishly and anti-socially.

Apart from anything else, the people who do this and protest their belief that their paying 'road tax' allows them to park wherever they like and remove other people's rights are usually (nonsensically) arguing their supposed case against other people who have also paid the same tax!

I never once said or remotely suggested that it did. I 100% agree with you re illegal and selfish/dangerous parking.

My point was merely addressing the people who like to be superior in telling people that there's no such thing as road tax, when to all intents and purposes, by the widespread common understanding, there is.

Just because this nasty builder invoked his paying 'road tax' as some kind of bizarre justification for his inability to park correctly and use his vehicle safely, that doesn't negate the fact that he has paid what is commonly understood as road tax; just that the tax buys him the same standard vehicle usage rights that everybody has, within the law, and doesn't randomly make him king of the road.

Anybody demanding that horses, cyclists and others shouldn't use the roads on the basis that they are not required to pay road tax - is clearly not very pleasant or very bright.

But that doesn't mean that there is no such thing as road tax (technically called VED) that many road users are required to pay for their circumstances (i.e. usually owning a motor vehicle) - any more than you could argue that there's no such thing as stamp duty, just because you yourself may have bought a house under the threshold and thus never been required to pay it.

It is not the existence of road tax that is responsible for any illegal actions that people who have to pay it may choose to perpetrate with their taxed vehicles.