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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think that people living longer is making quality of life for everyone worse?

640 replies

Futurascope · 14/05/2024 22:04

Possibly controversial…,

https://www.itv.com/news/2024-05-14/one-in-three-councils-not-confident-they-can-provide-basic-adult-social-care

“The fears about meeting the legal requirements come despite eight out of 10 councils forecasting having to cut spending on other community services such as parks, libraries and leisure centres to try to protect funding”.

So - libraries, leisure centres, parks, all vital for young children, families and others - being closed because the elderly desperately need social care.

As awful as it is for us all individually to lose somebody that we love….. is curing every disease, and having us all live to 100 really a good thing if it is at the expense of quality of life for the rest of society?

OP posts:
Thread gallery
8
WearyAuldWumman · 15/05/2024 18:11

Itsrainingten · 15/05/2024 16:56

"NineChickennuggets · Today 15:01
Perhaps we should stop the use of vaccinations. That should cut the number of people down quite easily."
Well it's interesting that you say that!
We don't vaccinate kids against chicken pox in this country because it's deemed worthwhile them catching it and getting sick (potentially very sick if they're unlucky - a kid in my DCS class was hospitalised with sepsis from chicken pox last year - it was touch and go) to ensure that elderly people get "boosted" by varicella by being around them, to help ensure protection for THEM against shingles.
When there is even a vaccine for shingles anyway! So kids get chickenpox now, and because of that will likely get shingles when they're old themselves, to help stop current elderly getting sick now (when they could just have a vax)
I hope you're all calling out the ageism there as well. Ageism works in both directions...

That doesn't make a lot of sense to me - I'm not disputing what you're saying - since elderly people here are offered the vax.

I've not had a vaccination yet, since I'm still in my 60s and I think you have to be in your 70s to get it. (My husband got the vax as a one off.) I had chickenpox once as a child and I've had shingles twice. (First time, I was in my 40s.)

Itsrainingten · 15/05/2024 18:14

@WearyAuldWumman well it's an economic decision based on ageism unfortunately. But people seem to think it only applies when it's the elderly that are being disadvantaged.

WearyAuldWumman · 15/05/2024 18:16

Itsrainingten · 15/05/2024 18:14

@WearyAuldWumman well it's an economic decision based on ageism unfortunately. But people seem to think it only applies when it's the elderly that are being disadvantaged.

The situation that you describe around the lack of a chickenpox vaccination seems really illogical to me.

WearyAuldWumman · 15/05/2024 18:17

WearyAuldWumman · 15/05/2024 18:16

The situation that you describe around the lack of a chickenpox vaccination seems really illogical to me.

According to the NHS website, it is actually available to some people - including medics.

https://www.nhs.uk/vaccinations/chickenpox-vaccine/

nhs.uk

Chickenpox vaccine

Find out about the chickenpox vaccine, including who can get it on the NHS, how to get it and what the side effects are.

https://www.nhs.uk/vaccinations/chickenpox-vaccine

upthehills1 · 15/05/2024 18:30

WearyAuldWumman · 15/05/2024 18:16

The situation that you describe around the lack of a chickenpox vaccination seems really illogical to me.

The mortality and hospitalisation rate of shingles in the elderly is wildly higher than that of chickenpox in children

K0OLA1D · 15/05/2024 18:37

Uniqueusername2 · 15/05/2024 16:59

Just the elderly. If you get to 90+ you’ve had a great life. I’m not talking about bumping off disabled people if that’s what you’re implying

So my able bodied nan, who is in better physical shape than me, needs to just throw the towel in if she needs help at 90? In just 3 years time? She has my dc for tea twice a week. I'll let her know

K0OLA1D · 15/05/2024 18:38

upthehills1 · 15/05/2024 17:48

They should respect her right to choose. Relatives have a tendency to suddenly assume they know what’s best for someone as they get older. Losing your independence is no joke.

It’s not about getting someone else to do the shopping. If you physicality can’t manage your activities of daily living, it’s likely you are in some pain, the things you enjoy.

Your comment suggests you care more about the thoughts of the relatives than the person themselves. Unfortunately this is all too common

Edited

Mate I know it's no joke. I am 33. I haven't had independence for almost 10 years. My life is still worth living. Even if it's just for my family.

K0OLA1D · 15/05/2024 18:40

Macaroni46 · 15/05/2024 17:58

@K0OLA1D

"Ridiculous. When I enquired about going private for a hip (I was going to get a loan), they said they could get me in in 2 weeks."

Same here. By going private I've been able to choose when I'm having the op which enables me to plan the least loss of earnings and have family around to help during my initial recovery.

I hope it all works out for you. Please message if you need to. It's good to have someone who has been through it before. There are really good UK knee replacement groups on FB too.

upthehills1 · 15/05/2024 18:43

K0OLA1D · 15/05/2024 18:38

Mate I know it's no joke. I am 33. I haven't had independence for almost 10 years. My life is still worth living. Even if it's just for my family.

That’s great if that’s what you want. But please respect the fact that others are allowed to have differing views on their own lives

K0OLA1D · 15/05/2024 18:45

upthehills1 · 15/05/2024 18:43

That’s great if that’s what you want. But please respect the fact that others are allowed to have differing views on their own lives

They aren't saying it for just themselves. They are saying it on behalf of everyone! And doubling down! That's the problem? Have you not been following this thread?

upthehills1 · 15/05/2024 18:49

K0OLA1D · 15/05/2024 18:45

They aren't saying it for just themselves. They are saying it on behalf of everyone! And doubling down! That's the problem? Have you not been following this thread?

Edited

Your original comment I responded to was about someone making a statement about themself.

In regards the thread in general, I don’t believe we should stop caring for the elderly. I do however believe thar we should not keep someone alive artificially if they have no quality of life. It’s torture and I’ve seen it first hand.

K0OLA1D · 15/05/2024 18:52

upthehills1 · 15/05/2024 18:49

Your original comment I responded to was about someone making a statement about themself.

In regards the thread in general, I don’t believe we should stop caring for the elderly. I do however believe thar we should not keep someone alive artificially if they have no quality of life. It’s torture and I’ve seen it first hand.

That wasn't me

viques · 15/05/2024 18:52

maddening · 14/05/2024 22:39

Logan's Run?

Soylent Green?

Thevelvelletes · 15/05/2024 18:59

Logan's run was a 70s film set in the future.once you hit 30 you were executed according to govt policy and if you went AWOL you were hunted down.

Kendodd · 15/05/2024 19:23

upthehills1 · 15/05/2024 18:49

Your original comment I responded to was about someone making a statement about themself.

In regards the thread in general, I don’t believe we should stop caring for the elderly. I do however believe thar we should not keep someone alive artificially if they have no quality of life. It’s torture and I’ve seen it first hand.

I agree.
And the people advocating for all kinds of treatments to extend painful and terrifying lifes act like they're the ones on the moral high ground .

ShyPoet · 15/05/2024 19:46

@Kendodd Elderly people refuse care to prolong life all the time. My mother did. The difference is they do not have an arbitrary person saying you are over 75 so too old for treatment.

K0OLA1D · 15/05/2024 19:47

Kendodd · 15/05/2024 19:23

I agree.
And the people advocating for all kinds of treatments to extend painful and terrifying lifes act like they're the ones on the moral high ground .

Where has anyone done that? I am arguing against people being written off due to their age.

ShyPoet · 15/05/2024 19:54

upthehills1 · 15/05/2024 18:49

Your original comment I responded to was about someone making a statement about themself.

In regards the thread in general, I don’t believe we should stop caring for the elderly. I do however believe thar we should not keep someone alive artificially if they have no quality of life. It’s torture and I’ve seen it first hand.

Who decides on quality of life? Is someone paraplegic judged to have no quality of life? Someone with complex autism? Someone non verbal?

EverythingYouDoIsaBalloon · 15/05/2024 20:18

WrenNatsworthy · 14/05/2024 22:42

I'm 51 and I'm dying so that'll make a bit more room eh.

@WrenNatsworthy I somehow missed your post till now. I'm so sorry this is happening to you. 💐

Itsrainingten · 15/05/2024 20:19

"upthehills1 · Today 18:30

WearyAuldWumman · Today 18:16

The situation that you describe around the lack of a chickenpox vaccination seems really illogical to me.
Show quote history
The mortality and hospitalisation rate of shingles in the elderly is wildly higher than that of chickenpox in children"

I mean, sure. But kids can and do end up in hospital or even occasionally die from chickenpox. To protect the elderly. Are you ok with that? I'm not. Especially when there is an actual shingles vaccine.

Rosscameasdoody · 15/05/2024 20:42

Itsrainingten · 15/05/2024 20:19

"upthehills1 · Today 18:30

WearyAuldWumman · Today 18:16

The situation that you describe around the lack of a chickenpox vaccination seems really illogical to me.
Show quote history
The mortality and hospitalisation rate of shingles in the elderly is wildly higher than that of chickenpox in children"

I mean, sure. But kids can and do end up in hospital or even occasionally die from chickenpox. To protect the elderly. Are you ok with that? I'm not. Especially when there is an actual shingles vaccine.

The Shingles vaccine is not available to everyone though, you have to be over a certain age. I’m vulnerable with multiple conditions including rheumatoid arthritis and my GP still wouldn’t give me the vaccine until I was in the right age group, despite multiple requests from the consultant rheumatologist.

Rosscameasdoody · 15/05/2024 20:45

ShyPoet · 15/05/2024 19:54

Who decides on quality of life? Is someone paraplegic judged to have no quality of life? Someone with complex autism? Someone non verbal?

Agree. I think some posters here haven’t got their heads around ‘keeping someone alive artificially’. Anyone who has had surgery for any condition which can kill you if left untreated, is being kept alive artificially. Cancers are more common in the elderly. Why should they be left to die a horrible death untreated if there’s something that can be done for them. The human race is in an awful state if we’re judging whether someone can be kept alive or not based on what it costs.

ShyPoet · 15/05/2024 20:49

My point is that able bodied people can assume someone disabled or chronically ill has no quality of life, when that person themselves values their life.

Rosscameasdoody · 15/05/2024 20:50

upthehills1 · 15/05/2024 18:43

That’s great if that’s what you want. But please respect the fact that others are allowed to have differing views on their own lives

It’s not just their own lives though is it ? This poster is clearly disabled and has to rely on others for care. From that viewpoint, the thought that someone else - a carer for example - could be given the authority to euthanise you if they deem your quality of life not to be very good is terrifying.

WearyAuldWumman · 15/05/2024 20:51

Itsrainingten · 15/05/2024 20:19

"upthehills1 · Today 18:30

WearyAuldWumman · Today 18:16

The situation that you describe around the lack of a chickenpox vaccination seems really illogical to me.
Show quote history
The mortality and hospitalisation rate of shingles in the elderly is wildly higher than that of chickenpox in children"

I mean, sure. But kids can and do end up in hospital or even occasionally die from chickenpox. To protect the elderly. Are you ok with that? I'm not. Especially when there is an actual shingles vaccine.

I haven't said that at all. I mean that it's illogical not vaccinate the population.

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