I think he’s expecting sex on the first date

[CherryBlossom97]

What might not even be a proper date now I’m thinking about it. I’ve been speaking to this guy for a few weeks. I’ve known him a while but not seen him for probably about 10 years.. he has turned recent conversations quite sexual and now he’s saying things like ‘This needs to happen sooner rather than later’ and now he says he’s free any day next week if I am with wink emojis so I think he’s now got an expectation. What would you do?

Yes, he is expecting something.

Ewwwwww. 'This needs to happen'? Not in a million years mate, goodbye.

Ugh. No. Raise your standards, you shouldn't even need to be asking.

Seems your side in this is missing, what are you saying to him that he is responding this has to happen sooner rather than later.

it is right to say no if you don’t want to. You can change your mind either way, at any time, but it is always best not to give someone an expectation if you have no desire to do something, saves awkward situations.

This.

You need to be crystal that it's not going to happen beforehand. If he doesn't want to meet once you tell him then you've escaped and there's no twattery about leading him on.

" this needs to happen sooner than later"
WTF!
Just block him, what a creep

Block and ignore.

Unless you want a casual shag. In which case go for it.

He sounds charming (yes that's sarcasm).
Run @CherryBlossom97, run.

Ridiculous responses on this thread. Tell him what your expectations are and if you are uncomfortable with a topic. He’s not a mind reader and pure online communication can be difficult at best.

If he ignores that you know that he won’t respect your boundaries, but you won’t know until you have been specific about your wants.

You say you knew him 10 years ago? as a friend or an ex? Someone you want to start again with?

Yes he wants sex (find me a man who doesn't) the question is "Do you?"

"This doesn't sound like something that's for me, so let's call it off. Good luck."

Block.

I’m not going to make our date. It’s become apparent that your interest in me is only sexual and that’s not what I’m looking for.

Ewww nope.
I would say to him "I am really interested in seeing you again but I'm keen to take things slow"

If he pushes your boundaries on the above then ditch him. He could be terrible at flirting, equally he could be an entitled prat.

What he’s actually saying is - I have the right to have access to your body now and whenever by I want.

Kick him to the kirb, he’s told you who he is.

I’d end it. I end any chat with a man that turns even vaguely sexual if I haven’t met them. It’s so disrespectful.
Yours is much worse. He’s saying we’ve chatted for ages l, I’ve put the work in, now where’s my reward. You don’t want to date someone like that.

Exactly,

He's just an entitled prat.

This needs to happen sooner rather than later’

Why would you lower yourself to just being a receiver or his cock?

He's not meeting you to find out what your interests and views are or to admire your hair and discuss all the lovely places you could visit together whilst getting g to know each other.

He is o my meeting you so that he can pleasure himself inside of you.

Please block him and find your self worth and know you can do so much better than him.

If you have any doubts have a mental image of you getting ready for your date and then sitting in a cafe or restaurant looking forward to nice food and great conversation and this bloody oaf walks in with his cock out waving it around as he walks towards you.

He's repulsive:

Receiver of ^

Straight in the bin 🗑️

You are more than just a body cavity OP.

But they have been chatting for weeks. I usually try to meet early as well because prolonged online chats often just fizzle out as you end up being strung along. The OP just needs to clarify her boundaries and expectations instead of being passive.

I’m a tad concerned about those telling you to raise your standards! This is almost akin to victim blaming.

On occasion, l’ve had sex on a first date when the chemistry is right and no regrets. My sister has been married for years to someone she had sex with within a few hours of meeting. But OP, this is clear not what you want and his language sounds very presumptuous. I would suggest that rather than ghost him as some have suggested, lay your cards on the table now and see how he responds. And never do anything you don’t want to do.

’Hey, I’m happy to go for a date and see if we get on in person, but I don’t do casual sex, so if that’s what you’re looking for then let’s call it day.’

FWIW I had a 3 month rule and told everyone from the beginning, it was great way to weed out the arseholes and it became a fun game for guys to see if they could ‘pass’ the test.

The reality is that the ones that weren’t compatible disappeared after the first month because they weren’t able to consistently put the effort into dates and those that went the distance turned into fantastic relationships because we had a genuine connection.

Spot on.

‘This needs to happen sooner rather than later…’ - and why would that be the case? I’d make him explain why it needs to be sooner rather than later. Does he only have a few days left on earth?

Depends if you want to have sex with him ?