GUEST WANTS SHOWER CURTAIN INSTALLED.

[Tartantotty]

I have a friend coming to stay with me for over a week in the Summer. She has sent a message asking that a shower curtain be installed in the en-suite bathroom she will use for the duration of her stay. She will pay.

Due to the shape of the bath etc it would be tricky to install a curtain and spoil the look of the place, I'm reluctant to do this, especially as she's getting free board and lodging in Edinburgh during festival time. AIBU reasonable in refusing? PS: She is a very large lady - no one else has complained about this, so guess it's due to her size.

I think I would tell her to accept the free ! guest ! room as it is. It's very rude of her to make such demand under the cover of friendship.

Can't you just get a tension rod and a curtain? She's paying for the solutions. Get on Amazon or eBay. It's the work of 5 minutes order and 5-10 to put them up. I'd happily do that for a friend.

No. Just politely decline and state property as is, when she stays, or she needs to find alternative accommodation.

She sort of sounds like my very entitled sister-in-law, who sails through life from a single prism point of view of what she wants, what she needs, what's most comfortable for her - and what everyone else can do to assist her.

But some people you just have to say a firm no to. If it sounds unreasonable, it usually is unreasonable.

how rude im large but i dont expet my hosts to rearrange or put up stuff for me

Or a windscreen wiper

I would say no. Nobody needs a shower curtain. She would have to get a hotel.

I have a bath with a hand held shower attachment to the taps. No screen. Set in a niche with a sloping roof so impossible to stand. In other words, a sit in the bath and shower type thing. Not possible to put in a curtain. It’s a holiday cottage for the last five years, has been fully booked all year round, not one complaint. It’s an old house, and there is another stand up shower in a bedroom en-suite. I feel that she has a cheek asking this but maybe when she stayed before she found it too difficult not to get the floor very wet and she is anxious about this. You can leave a mop and bucket for her to dry the floor after showering, let her know that this is the only solution.

I wonder if the guest is American.

I love my US cousins dearly, but one of them is quite unintentionally demanding. So at breakfast time "Where's your OJ?" and she couldn't actually believe that we didn't drink orange juice at breakfast because of course everyone does. Demanded a top sheet under the duvet because she found it too hot with the duvet ( I had to rush out and buy one as we don't use them).

The requests weren't too onerous, but they were presented as if it was absolutely standard that everyone in the entire world must drink orange juice and use a top sheet and I was somehow deficient for not having these things in place.

Whereas as a brit if she had said "Would it be possible to get some OJ/ top sheet, let me chip in for that " I would have been absolutely fine with it.

Since cost isn’t a factor I guess it really depends on how easy this is to do. I personally detest shower curtains and would rather have a screen since curtains stick to you! But I’m guessing either way it involves some DIY and it’s up to you if you can be bothered with this. I really have no clue how easy it is. If it was fairly easy I might consider doing it, but yanbu to decline.

Of course her size is relevant and it's pretty obvious why she's worried. She's trying to be thoughtful and not splash water/ she can't fit in with the screen if there is one. Maybe she feels embarrassed asking but it's better than causing damage to the bathroom. Maybe she carries the shame that so many women have internalised about her weight. Maybe she's coming across as a bit demanding but that's masking all sorts of worries. Maybe an honest conversation about why she needs a shower curtain, done kindly and thoughtfully might give her a chance to let some of those insecurities out and help her in the long run.

It's not very thoughtful to expect someone to drill holes into their bathroom walls/tiles to accommodate a weekend visit.

It would be more thoughtful to offer to stay in a hotel.

It’s mumsnet. Any excuse to bash the gigantic enormous elephantine morbidly obese woman (who is probably a size 16).

Why did you 'have to rush out and buy one'? Couldn't you have just said 'sorry we don't use top sheets so don't have them'?

But no-one's expecting anyone to drill any holes.

For £20 you can buy a spring loaded pole, hooks and shower curtain from Argos, Ikea, Dunelm etc.

I don't see why this is such a big issue. I think if I was the guest, I'd just buy it myself, put it up before my first shower, and remove it before I left if I thought a simple request about wanting to have a shower without flooding the bathroom was going to cause so much drama.

I just use a king size duvet cover as a top sheet on hot nights! I would have offered that 😆

Really all this conversation is moot unless OP comes back and explains the shower set up.

Don’t hurt your business for your friends.

My first thought was 'CF' but then you mentioned her size and now I feel really bad for her
She must be a close friend if she's staying so long so, assuming the request is out of character, I'd guess it took a lot for her to ask and she must be really worrying about fitting inside the existing arrangements (assuming you have a shower screen?)

Like a pp has said, if you can put up something temporary, like a telescopic pole or a curtain wire on hooks (even command hooks) then I'd really try to accommodate her request and not embarrass her about it

I also think she is worried about water bouncing out onto the floor because of her size

i bought a tension pole and cheap curtain for my whizzy new bathroom while waiting for the hideously expensive, bespoke new glass doors to be delivered and installed.

it was cheap as chips, no trouble, left no marks, and was far more efficient that said doors as it turned out

but if there are no walls to tension it against, I’d just get an extra large bath
mat

Wtf? Just no. Stay elsewhere if yours isn't suitable!

Possibly the most fustrating thread ever. An OP with inadequate information followed by an update that was just as bad. This kind of thing should be banned.

If the friend explained why she thinks she needs the shower curtain, the OP would be able to either alleviate her concerns or have more understanding for her request. Maybe the explanation got left out the OP.

After 7 pages, I'd like a diagram / photo of the shower set up please. I'm invested now.

Yes, it makes me think the op just wanted to fat bash and got plenty of people to join in.

With no explanation of what currently contains the water from the shower, this thread makes no sense otherwise.

Not sure what else OP can do, she thanked everyone for responses and updated her next course of action.

This? Although if you haven’t got a shower (just a bath) she’ll have to lump it, but what do you have at the moment?

I have brain damage and as a result issues with spatial awareness. One result of this is that I fine it hard to work out which way the shower head is pointing. Your bathroom would be soaked in about 2 seconds if I was there. I wouldn't want to soak the bathroom every day I was staying with you. Having some kind of barrier is a very reasonable request.

I honestly don't see the issue with her request? Shower curtains don't need to be installed so to speak, you can get telescopic rods that you can just remove after her stay. If you've agreed she can stay I'm not sure why you wouldn't want her to be comfortable if it's a minimal inconvenience to you?