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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

GUEST WANTS SHOWER CURTAIN INSTALLED.

231 replies

Tartantotty · 08/05/2024 08:15

I have a friend coming to stay with me for over a week in the Summer. She has sent a message asking that a shower curtain be installed in the en-suite bathroom she will use for the duration of her stay. She will pay.

Due to the shape of the bath etc it would be tricky to install a curtain and spoil the look of the place, I'm reluctant to do this, especially as she's getting free board and lodging in Edinburgh during festival time. AIBU reasonable in refusing? PS: She is a very large lady - no one else has complained about this, so guess it's due to her size.

OP posts:
AGodawfulsmallaffair · 08/05/2024 09:26

TwoLeftSocksWithHoles · 08/05/2024 08:19

I would avoid the use of the word 'lump' in this situation. 😉

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😆

AGodawfulsmallaffair · 08/05/2024 09:27

Overtheatlantic · 08/05/2024 08:17

might be from a country where people use shower curtains and feels uncomfortable without one

Tough.

Hereyoume · 08/05/2024 09:28

If she is "a very large lady", you may have issues with point loads on the bath. The bath may not be strong enough to support her weight when standing up. Also, is she slips getting over the edge of the bath, she could be very seriously injured due to her size and weight.

Maybe rethink your offer.

tellmewhenthespaceshiplandscoz · 08/05/2024 09:28

To be honest OP unless you provide more details on the set up you already have nobody can make any meaningful suggestions as to whether you ABU or not

PaminaMozart · 08/05/2024 09:31

Tartantotty · 08/05/2024 08:31

Thanks all. I will write her and tell her that this is not possible. She is lucky to get free accommodation at I time when I usually earn a bit of extra money on Air bnb. I guess she wants the curtain because the bath is small and guess she doesn't want to splash water all over the place.

I'm soooo puzzled...

What kind of shower screen is there atm - and why does she need a shower curtain...??

LookItsMeAgain · 08/05/2024 09:32

You know you can get shower curtain rods that are pressure fitted so that they are not screwed into anything and could be removed once your guest leaves? That she is offering to pay for it must mean that she really wants to stay with you and this is the only stumbling block to her being comfortable in doing that.

When you say that your bathroom is an odd shape, does it have two walls that you could install a shower curtain rod to? If you do, then you are being very unwelcoming to her. If you would prefer to earn money through AirBnB then do that but don't make your friend and the shower curtain the reason. Be honest and say you want to earn money and she isn't paying.

Just a quick follow up question - if your friend was to pay for their stay, would you be more open to the suggestion of installing a shower curtain?

Overtheatlantic · 08/05/2024 09:33

Bjorkdidit · 08/05/2024 08:35

Like the UK you mean? Or pretty much all other countries where people have showers and don't want to flood their bathrooms?

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No that’s not true. Private homes I’ve been in have had screens. I was surprised when I first moved here 15 years ago.

AnImaginaryCat · 08/05/2024 09:35

This is just weird. There isn't a certain size humans get where the water splashes out if they use a bath that has a shower over it. That happens if a person is in it an moves while the water is on.

If you've got a screen in place then the shower curtain request makes now sense, ecause surely adding a curtain too just makes it more restricted.

So is it a wet room or is it a style over practicality situation?

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 08/05/2024 09:47

Yeah she’s being a CF.

ViscousDog · 08/05/2024 09:54

Why aren't you answering when people ask if you have a screen?

babybrum · 08/05/2024 10:02

If you don't have anything in place it doesn't matter her size. It's impractical and she won't want to be responsible for the damage to your floor. Do you just not care because you don't use the bathroom and it looks better without?

Westfacing · 08/05/2024 10:03

Tartantotty · 08/05/2024 08:31

Thanks all. I will write her and tell her that this is not possible. She is lucky to get free accommodation at I time when I usually earn a bit of extra money on Air bnb. I guess she wants the curtain because the bath is small and guess she doesn't want to splash water all over the place.

A small bath, how did that happen? And how does she know you have a small bath?

CombatBarbie · 08/05/2024 10:08

Is it a standalone bath with an overhead shower. I'm guessing her size is her concern which is totally relevant to the thread, it's not fat shaming,

Librarybooker · 08/05/2024 10:10

KimberleyClark · 08/05/2024 09:21

We have a moveable screen and a wide at one end, p-shaped bath. All the water stays in the bath.

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Yes we have had that in places we’ve lived. Prefer that to a shower curtain. Having nothing at all doesn’t work though

Bloom15 · 08/05/2024 10:13

Your friend is cheeky - either accept what is there now or stay somewhere else. Same as you do with a hotel/air b n b - where you actually pay to stay

thedendrochronologist · 08/05/2024 10:15

What is currently there?

A bath only
A bath and hand held shower
A bath shower and screen

It's weird but I kind of get where she is coming from unless it's just a bath

My friend had claw bath and hand held shower. No curtain and it was weird.

But I'd not ask her to put a curtain up!

ViveLaOeuf · 08/05/2024 10:17

Bit weird and demanding!

But do you not have anything there at the moment to keep the water in the shower OP? I'm not big and I'd find it difficult to have a decent shower without some sort of curtain or screen to catch the water and stop it going on the floor.

wombleberry · 08/05/2024 10:18

"She is a very large lady - no one else has complained about this, so guess it's due to her size."

Why on Earth would this be a reason?! Maybe this is her way of saying she doesn't want to slip over on your bathroom floor and a shower curtain would help her with that by keeping water inside the shower?! Your fatphobia is unreal and perfectly unrelated to the weird request from your friend.

Feel free to use your words and ask her about this instead of slapping it all over the internet that she's fat and therefore unreasonable. Honestly, with friends like you who needs enemies? Hopefully your friend doesn't know you're so judgemental and unpleasant.

CasperGutman · 08/05/2024 10:18

Peachy2005 · 08/05/2024 09:21

It will be this kind of setup. No shower screen so you have to sit or hunker in the bath and still be careful or water will get everywhere so taking a standing shower is impossible. Your friend’s size is irrelevant: it’s an old-fashioned UK thing, from the days when people took more baths or washed their hair leaning over the bath - proper showers were rare. Our family bathroom in our rented house is like this (never use it) and we just looked at another house with the same arrangement (wish I had taken a pic as bath, sink and toilet were floral-patterned!). It’s still OPs house and choice and expecting her to change it is CF behaviour by her friend….but friend’s size is irrelevant!!

It'll be that, I bet. It's not really meant for you to hunker down uncomfortably in the bath while showering though. The idea is for you to have a bath, and the shower head is just to make it easier to wash your hair while you're in there.

We have one of these over the bath in our family bathroom. It was particularly useful for washing the children's hair when they were small. I wouldn't want to use this to take any kind of shower, though. I'd use the separate shower in the same room or in the other shower room!

In the OP's position I'd be telling the cheeky would-be guest that the en suite is not going to be modified for her but she's welcome to just use the washbasin and loo in there and use the proper shower in the main bathroom (assuming there is one and OP doesn't shower while hunkering in the guest bath!).

VickyEadieofThigh · 08/05/2024 10:21

We've got the hand-held shower thingy in one of our bathrooms, but there IS a shower curtain as well, so that people can stand up and shower in they want to.

RobBeckettsGiantTeeth · 08/05/2024 10:23

Ringpeace · 08/05/2024 08:17

"Please remodel your home in order to accommodate my bulk during my free stay in a very expensive city's most expensive time of year."

My answer would be like it or lump it.

You can say this without fat shaming, you know.

Well, you can't, obviously.

missshilling · 08/05/2024 10:26

I’m struggling to see what is weird about having a shower curtain around a bath with a shower. We have one. Without it water would splash everywhere and soak the bathroom floor.

QueenCamilla · 08/05/2024 10:27

I'd use the separate shower in the same room or in the other shower room!

⬆️ If they don't have bread, let them eat cake - Marie Antoinette

I'd just use the annexe in the stately grounds, as all normal people do 😁

FiatEarth · 08/05/2024 10:31

So large that without a curtain you run the risk of your bathroom being flooded?

I would disconnect the shower and offer shower facilities by way of garden hose in the garden.

That's really not on.

What about the strain on your bed or chairs?

You must have been mad to agree to her staying!

Maybe up your home insurance to cover any breakages or damage.

EmmaGrundyForPM · 08/05/2024 10:32

OP, do you have a screen? If not, how do you stop water going everywhere?