A women called Claire moved in across the street from me in March with her 3 kids who are 6, 8 and 9 it’s clear already she’s a CF.
Shes constantly ‘borrowing’ things, (rarely returns them) has asked for lifts a few times and sends her kids round to neighbours with kids, often it’s to the woman next door to me called Sarah to play with 8 year old son.
Sarah is getting really pissed off because she’ll send her kids close to meal times and they often expect to be fed as well.
If she says to them it’s time to go home for dinner then they just say they will wait for her son to finish eating and sit down at the table so she ends up feeling like she has to cook for the kids too.
She has told Claire that this keeps happening but Claire just said “oh they clearly like your cooking better then mine then!”
Sarah is soft and hates confrontation and upsetting anyone and has even said she’s struggling to keep feeding 3 extra kids but Claire just tells her to send them home then. She knows full well that Sarah will be too soft to tell them outright they need to go home and they will ignore hints and suggestions.
A couple of weeks ago she sent her kids over and went shopping without even checking Sarah was there, Sarah usually works from home but had the day off and gone out with friends. I’d been out but as I arrived back saw the kids playing alone in her garden.
I didn’t want to leave them out there alone so took them into my house and kept them occupied and gave them a sandwich till Claire got back. She arrived back a couple of hours later just as Sarah was also getting home with her son.
I was absolutely livid because the kids had been hard work and had been fighting with each other, messing with all my stuff and there had been a tantrum when I refused to let them play on my iPad. I’m not great with kids at the best of times and these 3 are hard work.
I told Claire if she does that again I’m calling social services and said she chose to have kids so she needs to take care of them. She started crying saying she has hardly any support and is a single parent with no family struggling.
I said I had sympathy but she still needs to parent her kids.
She stopped sending the kids over and I know she’s asked another neighbour to have them when she’s had her nails and hair done but that’s none of my business.
But then today Claire has turned up on my doorstep and asked me to have her kids overnight next weekend whilst she goes out for a friends birthday! She’d asked other neighbours but they all said no.
I said no and wouldn’t back down despite her pleading with me. I chose to be childfree so I’m not taking on someone else’s kids.
When she finally got the message I wasn’t backing down she said “ok in that case can you make this to make it up to me?”
She hands me a recipe book open on a page with a cake and said she wanted it making for her friend’s birthday. Apparently she gives her a homemade cake every year but gets someone else to bake it and takes the credit because she can’t bake.
I told her to make her own cake and stop leeching off people and that I found her having the audacity to be this persistent strange and couldn’t believe how much cheek she had to knock on peoples doors and expect things from them for nothing.
Claire started crying again and said she thought we should all be a community as we were neighbours and that’s what she expected when she moved here. She said all parents need a village and again mentioned she had no family or friends nearby.
I tried to explain what she wants only exists if everyone agrees and she needs to put back in as much as she takes.
I was pretty harsh with her and another neighbour came out to see what was going on.
I don’t know how it happened but the other neighbour agreed to make the cake whilst looking after her kids and acted like I’d been a complete monster to make Claire cry when she was clearly feeling alone and not coping.
it’s got me wondering if it’s me being unreasonable and should I be making cakes and providing childcare for someone who isn’t even a friend and has never done a single thing to help anyone else as far as I know?!
It just goes to show how these cheeky fuckers get this way if people give into them as soon as they put pressure on, I’m normally such a people pleaser who hates confrontation and I was so proud I’d stood up for myself.
I NC and other names and details as not to be outing. Not sure if Claire is on mumsnet but tbh if she is and recognises this then it might make her think about her behaviour - unless it is me being completely unreasonable!