To think she thought I was 10 years younger than I am

[Mairzydotes]

I was at the dentist yesterday. The receptionist asked my date of birth first, and I gave it , and she then asked my name. She then quiried if it was the ' somethingth' or the 'twenty- somethingth' and I confirmed the correct one. ( I referred to the month by name).

She said there was nobody coming up. Then she asked if I was at the correct dentists. I was because I always go there. She asked me if I was sure I was I was actually registered because they had no patients with that dob 1993. I was born in 1983. She finds me , and I have my check up.

Then I've been thinking, she didn’t check the year at all, so she must have took me as being 31, 10 years younger than I am .

But according to mumsnet, nobody can ever be mistaken for 10 years younger than their actual age, in the real world.

This. Young lady is just more polite, they are hardly going to say "hey- old lady, come here" are they? LOL

Because cshe wasn't concentrating on how old you look but on what you said. And visually I'm not sure there's that much difference between 30 and 40.

I don't ask. They tell me.

What is it with this emotional investment in the idea that it's impossible to look younger than you are? Some people do.

I'm very slim, I'm good looking, and I wear fairly natty outfits. I don't know what else to tell you other than people assume someone who looks like me isn't over 40. I looked about 12 when I was 16, so it's been constant throughout my life that people assume I'm younger than I am. Just one of those things.

Honestly, get over it! 😂

I'm very slim, I'm good looking, and I wear fairly natty outfits. I don't know what else to tell you other than people assume someone who looks like me isn't over 40. I looked about 12 when I was 16, so it's been constant throughout my life that people assume I'm younger than I am. Just one of those things.

Have any of these people who think you are under 40 heard you refer to your "natty outfits"?

Some people - well women, look fantastic. I can't pin an age on them because I don't know what the parameters are for how somebody is supposed to look.

I'm thinking of some actors who I've always thought look young - Caroline Quentin for one. She went to the spa I go to once and she looks fabulous. Deborah Findlay is another. They're kind of timeless but neither are in their 20-30s anymore.

I'm sure you do look great, Deludamol, there's no need for defensiveness, this thread is predictable and the daft things being said, like "young lady" and being ID'd isn't any sort of barometer. Saying it here and being gently chided to think about it is better than being mocked in real life by people you perhaps have to see all the time.

The sad thing is, it's only ever women who are judged - and judge - based on age. We should stop it at least.

I was also querying why you'd be preening if strangers are randomly saying this to you? It's not normal to blurt out whatever is in you head and being that personal with somebody you do not know is just creepy. Or it would be to me. Really creepy.

I'm not defensive at all. I'm just getting a lot of PPs addressing me in comments. I don't particularly care whether people want to assume I look wizened or not. They can't see me so I'm not going to be offended when it's just a blind assumption.

Lol people always say Im a young mum, couldnt have a 15yr old etc

Nothing to do with looking younger than 40, my age, just more thay llt most professional women have babies 35+ so I'm an anomaly

I’m trying to picture these randoms telling you you look younger than your actual age, when you haven’t actually told them your age.
It sounds a fairly bizarre conversation all round.

People do believe my age when i tell them but when i say i have adult children i seem to hear you dont look old enough or your not old enough to have adult children yet.
Im 38.
I always take it with a smile no harm done.

The only people who I genuinely dont think look their age are JLo and Angela Bassett.

I have never met anyone in real life whose age I couldn't guess give or take a couple of years here and there. I have met people who claimed to look decades younger and they really did not. But I would just smile and nod when they said it as its rude and unkind to say anything else and what would it achieve?

I have also referred to women I knew full well were older as "young lady" because it made them smile and who doesnt like a compliment. I like to encourage women especially as it's hard being female and being judged heavily on appearances.

Yeah this doesn’t mean anything. Receptionist at our dentist asked me to spell my name and asked me to speak louder halfway through so I repeated myself - he ended up typing my name in as (for example) Alexalexandra

I mean, as an ex GP receptionist, I used to just type what I heard. I rarely calculated what age that birth year would make the patient nor did I ever judge whether they looked older or younger, it's just an easy mistake to make when you type what you hear all day.

I always act surprised when someone tells me their age and say oh surely not I would have said “ten years younger” I’m just lying but it makes peoples day. I thought everyone does this.

I am 38 with a uni age child and always get - oh you don’t look old enough to have teens/a kid at uni. It’s just because I started earlier than a lot of people and not because I look particularly young.

Honestly OP - You may look great for your age, I can't comment on that, but she will simply have misheard what you said and wouldn't have given a thought about what age that made you. She was following a process and that is what would be on her mind.

I was asked by my GP very recently what occupation I had - moments after I had confirmed my date of birth. She was a bit embarrassed when I said I had been retired for a number of years, and looked again at my DOB 😂I just told her I'd take that as a compliment. But in reality, it was just her asking questions which come to her mind, because it might have been relevant to the problem I was seeing her about.

It is possible for someone to look younger than their actual age - just as some people look older than their actual years, no matter what people on MN say - but some people aren't very observant. My daughter was once ID'd in a supermarket when buying some alcohol - she was 42 at the time! She does look quite young for her age, but not 17 years younger!!

I always act surprised when someone tells me their age and say oh surely not I would have said “ten years younger” I’m just lying but it makes peoples day. I thought everyone does this

This is why I do it too- it makes people smile. I mean, what else are you going to say? yes, you do look every bit of your 65 years 😂

Compliments are just a social lubricant that people use to make interactions more pleasant. If we knew every thought others were really thinking it would be horrific

To be fair, you are young to have adult children.

I got called a young lady the other day. Wrong on both accounts but I just smiled. I forgot to report it on MN to get slayed though!

About five years ago a GP said she thought she’d got the wrong notes up and then said how well I was doing (or something like that). But yes, on here no-one’s allowed to say they look younger than their age!

Eh? People on here say it all the time.
You just did.

Of course you're allowed to say it but the examples people are giving are just a bit silly- especially when people have said in this thread they say it to deliberately compliment people and not because they are genuinely staggered that someone is 45.

Your doctor saying it is a prime example of this. Doctors mainly see people who are older and frail and have chronic health issues so of course their sample of what 50/60 looks like for example, is going to be skewed to the more unwell, older end because healthy, fit, younger looking people dont tend to frequent the doctors as much because they dont need to. Therefore, when they do meet someone who appears younger than their "norm" it's going to stand out to them. If you went to a convention of former olympic athletes over age 50 you probably wouldn't get those comments because the sample you are in will likely be fitter and healthier and therefore the comparison is completely different.

People think I'm young to have adult children and I'm 10 years older than you.

As if!
Unless the twist is that you’re 95 and still running marathons?

Thank you but i do.🙂

I know, my point is that it's not surprising that people think you look young to have adult children, because you are.